If anything can turn me from a mild-mannered, even-tempered, easy-going person to seething, raging, and ready to kill it’s a) someone standing in an office door way (or roaming around the office) eating something larger than small snack, b) someone commenting in anyway on what I may be eating, c) making inordinate amounts of noise when eating - smacking, slurping - pleeease don’t.
I don’t want you munching a sandwich as you talk to me. If you want to eat a handful of something small: jellybeans; peanuts; etc. as you wander about - that’s fine, but a salad that you’re eating from a bowl as you walk around the office just makes me crazy.
I swear I go totally ‘stabby’ if someone dares to judge what I choose to eat. I don’t care if you think I’ve made “ooh a healthy choice”. I don’t need you to comment on whether I go back for seconds. Don’t say “mmmm that looks good”. Generally paying any attention at all to what’s on my plate I find very rude. Pay attention to your own plate, goddammit.
I’ve tried to determine why I can’t just smile and go on - but it has literally ruined my mood and made me all cranky for the remainder of the day.
You’re not alone. I hate the “That looks good” shit too. It is a fucking frozen meal cooked in a microwave, not fine cusine!
I’m sure it comes from my hatred of small talk. I’m forced to make it 8 hours a day with clients, I damn well don’t want to make small talk at work when I’m on break.
I get irrationally *enraged *when I can hear someone else chewing or slurping (which I think stems from the awful sounds my mom makes when she’s eating a banana–I have literally had to excuse myself from the room).
But, we’re social animals. Although I’m an introvert who doesn’t comment on other people’s food choices, I can understand why extroverts do–especially in an office environment when it can be hard to find a benignly distracting, non-work topic of conversation. Someone talking about my meal doesn’t really bother me, but I know enough people who are bothered by it to refrain from doing it myself.
Seems a tad hypersensitive. But that’s probably because it’s something I would never give a thought to. Eating and talking, slurping noises, all not nice, but it seems easy enough to just move to another seat, in avoidance.
But hey, y’know what? Everyone has something that ticks them off, and those things must seem hypersensitive to people who don’t notice them.
I say, as long as you don’t actually get stabby, a personal miff is more than understandable.
Roaming around eating doesn’t bother me, nor does someone eating while talking to me f2f. Assuming the eater is being neat about it. Commenting on food either way - eh, I do it, don’t mind it at all. Then again I don’t mind small talk.
Noisy eating, or anyone eating while talking to me on the phone - makes me nuts. Like rachelellogram, I think that stems back to having a very noisy, mouth-open-while-eating person in the family and it’s just gross. I’ll end phone calls with someone who’s eating while talking to me abruptly by saying I’ll call back when they’re done with their meal.
If you didn’t pay attention to what people were eating, the way you don’t want them to pay attention to what you’re eating, you wouldn’t get annoyed by what they were eating, would you? Or is that too simplistic?
I’m guilty of commenting on others’ food if it looks good. Mostly it’s just to make small talk and be social, but partly it’s because I don’t always know anything else to say after years of not really being around anyone while agoraphobic. Anyway, to anyone I’ve offended, I apologize. This has never been an issue on my radar, but now that it is, I’ll try to do better.
Feel free to comment on whatever I’m eating! That’s always appreciated, especially if it’s something I’ve made myself. Totally not a social faux-pas in my opinion.
If I hear popcorn obviously popping, I will comment. Otherwise in my cube farm, I do not hear others eating. And if I did I don’t think I’d care. There are about a billion things I’d complain about first. Plus, whoever is going to get it gets me on their list, which is awesome.
(1) At my first and last Real Job, I had a co-worker who often came into the department (worktables all in one large open space) first thing in the morning and proceeded to eat a bowl of cereal, with milk, before the shift began. Damn, woman, is your kitchen table broken?
(2) The clink-clink-clink sound of Mr. S’s spoon against his cereal bowl as he sits across the room from me reading the news and such on the other computer = fingernails on a chalkboard. I know it’s my irrational response, and he’s not obnoxious about it or anything, it’s just normal noise, but sometimes I have to leave the room until he’s done. Maddening since it’s MY office.
So…nom nom nom…you dont’…nom nom…like me…nom nom… eating …nom…nom… my sandwich…nom.,…nom…loudly?
The thing that always got me was when people were eating a sandwich and holding it in a death grip while standing and talking to me while I sat. I focused them alright. I was focus on when the mayonnaise would be squeezed out and land on their shirt.
It’s not strange, and you’re not alone. I spend a lot of money on good headphones to ensure the survival of the slurpers/slobberers in my office. If my headphones are stolen or fail, there’s a good chance I will be on the evening news.
You are not alone. If you approve of what I’m eating, I get “Oh, that’s sooo healthy!” (It’s healthful, dammit. And it’s none of your business.) If you don’t approve, it’s “Oh, that looks like a hearty meal!” Yeah, and next I’m going to eat your kid fried in lard. STFU.
These people are on my list right next to the ones who say “That looks like a good book!”
I have a potential explaination for this one. I can’t eat when I first wake up. I need to be up at least an hour before I’m ready to consume food and sometimes it’s up to 2. If I want to eat at home before going to the office I would need to be up by 5:30am and sleep time is valuable. I will salute her budgetary restraint however because my solution was a little cafe in the subway station where I would eat before walking up to the office.
I don’t mind comments that something looks or smells yummy. Other than that, keep it to yourself. I don’t need your value judgments on whether my food is healthy, or I could have made it healthier by substituting this for that.
I’m not too upset by people eating whatever they want to eat wherever, if it’s not in my space.
As for noisy/messy eating…serioulsy…how old are you? Have you not yet learned to chew with your mouth shut or use a napkin? This is the worst eating offense there is.
This. There’s an inherent . . . if not hypocrisy, than an illogic to the OP’s opinion. Other people, I’m paying attention to what you eat and don’t like it when you eat specific things, but don’t you dare talk to me about what I eat, keep your eyes and thoughts to yourself!
Which isn’t to say I don’t also have things about which I feel similarly, but it makes it hard to get behind the OP.
I recognize there is no logic in my opinion. It’s in recognition of my lack of logic that I’ve come here to determine whether it’s a shared lack of logic.
I understand people need to eat, get busy and eat whilst they do other things. I’m not really commenting on what they eat as much as the size of what they eat. For example: a handful of something, a “nibble” so-to-speak, doesn’t bother me. Rather if something takes two hands or has to be on plate or in a bowl as you wander around, I think “Goddammit, sit down and eat your meal”. Perhaps it also invokes my belief that you don’t eat in front of people who are not eating.
With respect to other people’s comments on what I’m eating - I would never pass any judgment on what people eat, whether I take note of it or not. I feel it’s not my business to discuss your choices. And therefore none of yours what I choose to eat. I found another example of what makes me nuts. I was having my lunch at my desk (as I often do) and my assistant popped her head in my door. “Oh, sorry, I’ll come back when you’re finished your snack”, she said. It wasn’t a freakin’ snack it was my lunch. I don’t snack . . . grrrrrrrr
Totally not a social faux-pas in my opinion.