I think a appropriately sized Stegosaurus tail would serve many uses. Useful in handling every day idiots and potentially as a way to serve hors d’oeuvres (sp?) Of course, Prehensile would be mighty useful.
Has anyone considered a squirrel tail? Instant sunshade, umbrella, blanket, pillow, and seat cusion all in one.
A Giger’s Alien tail, complete with stinger.
It would be useful for recalcitrant vending machines.
Big old fluffy ring-tailed lemur tail. That’d be sweet.
I feel I must point out that crocodiles and alligators don’t really “attack” with their tails. True, the tails of crocodilians are massively powerful, since it is their main source of swimming propulsion. So, if you happen to be in the water with one (not a great idea for a number of reasons) and manage to spook him, the tail can do a huge amount of damage if it strikes you accidentally. But if a gator really wants to hurt you he’s going to come at you with his teeth.
Iguanas, on the other hand, will happily flay your skin open with their whiplike tails if they feel like it, so this might be a suitable substitute. Me, I think I’d go for a pangolin tail, just to be different.
I read a SF story once, a long time ago ( I want to say it was “Venus on the Halfshell”…) that involved an alien race that had tails and used them for kinky sex. And pitied the poor races that had to have sex without the benifit of tails.
So sign me up for one of those…
I would definatley get a tunafish tail. According to marine biologists, tunafish shouldn’t be able to move as fast or as long as they can with the muscles they have, so they must have super-fish tails, I want that!
of course I might make a sandwich out of myself while sleepwalking…
I want a long tail with a fully functional hand. I can’t decide if it should be a left or right hand, though.
why not a symmetrical hand with two thmbs?
I’d want one flexible enough that I can tickle my own ass during sex.
A long tail like a lion’s, but very flexible. It would be very strong and I could use it to whip people. But I could also hang from it and grab stuff with it.
You know, when I was little, I wanted a tail. For our Christmas play when I was in first grade, the first graders all played lions. My mom made me a tail out of rope and a little yarn pouf on the end. I used to wear it around the house.
You know, if you had a long tail, could you use it to masturbate?
(Dude, do I have a sick mind tonight!)
Hmmm, Sock Munkey, a symmetrical hand sounds versatile and a godsend to the glove industry. Two thumbs up!
If you were gonna be masturbating it, you’d still use it to pick up stuff and hang off of? Scary analogies
I hope you would at least wash it first…
Gotta agree with the OP regarding prehensile. That tail is gonna make buying pants a bitch, so it better be able to hold another tool, hang onto the ladder, or somehow be useful, like the other appendages!
Possibly TMI
Playboy bunny tail.
That way I could powder my nose with my ass.
I like the hand-equipped tail… I’d want mine to have very thick, strong fingers, with tough skin, so I could also use it to support my weight, handle sharp or hot objects, etc.
The fingers should all be mutually-opposable, so I could grab an object with any pair. Clearly, it wouldn’t look much like a human hand, but why should it? I have two human hands already.
Since the hand is so solidly-built, it could serve as a useful club when clenched. I think I’d like some small spikes, too, in rows along the sides of the tail, and some little ones on the knuckles. Not too big or too sharp, though… I don’t want to gut myself while I sleep!
The tail should be quite thick and strong… I want to be able to lift my own weight at least, both pulling and pushing. Long enough to reach around in front and hold work in place while my other hands manipulate tools, flexible enough to scratch my own back.
Prehensile devil’s tail, complete with barbs. Tool, weapon, conversation piece!
Cute, right up untill you have to do a post-dump wipe. LOOK OUT CAPTAIN IT"S THE CLING-ONS!
I suppose a lobster-like claw on the end of a thick kangaroo-like tail would fit the consensus on what the best tail would be.
i think sleeping on our backs might be a little uncomfy too.
maybe there’d be tail beauty salons, so you could dye your monkey tail punk blue!
i think there could be interesting things done with music, if the tail was dexterous enough to use some instrument. hmm, tail handbell choirs?
gradeschool might have more issues- “teacher! he pulled my tail again!”
psychotherapy might incorporate “tail envy” or early childhood tail loss trauma in their counseling assessments…
i’m not sure what tail i want yet, i like the monkey tail idea because i could hang from a tree and have hands free to eat tropical fruits, which sounds fun. i’m kind of considering a tiger tail, just because it’s my chinese animal sign. i’ll have to think about this more.