[obligatory Hell, Michigan joke]
No, that’s Detroit. Hell is just down the road a little ways, though.
[/obligatory Hell, Michigan joke]
Looking at Christian theolgy at its most basic face value, Christ came promising eternal life. Period. As a Protestant sermon I heard some years ago put it, the punishment for failing to be saved is not eternal life in Hell, it is death. You cease to exist.
I don’t know but you can bet there will be plenty of insurance salesmen there though…
For a good (if not theologically accurate) view of Hell check out the “In Hell” series of books by Chris and Janes Morris. A lot of people are there for a lot of reasons, some of them fairly trivial. Also the version of Hell that they write of is pantheistic.
There are lakes of fire and demons with pitchforks but mainly as a backdrop for the most vile torture that I can think of enduring for aeons. Frustration.
All of your obsessions foil you in hell, the passions that were your downfall or folly in life plague you and never satisfy you.
Not to mention that you are constipated and probably have erectile disfunction or some form of VD. Hell is a not-fun place to be, but it is a lot of fun to read about.
My personal favorite in the series is “Heroes In Hell”.
All in all a great read.
The Devil in Miss Jones?
You get locked in a jail cell with an eternal erection/hormonal imbalance and an attractive member of the opposite sex who keeps looking at bugs and talking about bugs and slowly drives you out of your mind so that you can be the bug person for the next inmate.
I recently read a monograph on Hell (really!) that discussed four different kinds of hell which are popular among theologians. I can’t recall the terms they used off the top of my head but I did take some notes which I can find if anyone cares.
Basically they discussed whether hell was literal (actual burning sulfur, or actual physical pain) or metaphorical (indirectly painful because of absence from God); whether it was eternal (once you were in hell you stayed forever in that state) or temporary (having rejected Christ’s atonement, you had to pay the price for your own sins, but then you were free to go). There were other, more subtle differences that I can’t recall. And there were representative schools of theologicians who espoused each of these interpretations (and their various combinations.)
Moving from the general to the particular I can add that the Mormon conception of Hell would probably fall in the metaphorical, temporary category. Mormon theology and metaphysics is, however, usually radically different from that of other Christian sects and hell is no exception. There is a special category reserved for the worst sinners that is worse than Hell. It is known as “outer darkness” and those who inherit that reward are known as “the sons of Perdition”, Perdition being one of the names of Satan. In Mormon scripture (Doctine & Covenants, Section 76), God specifically states that the only ones who will understand it are those who experience it. It’s also believed that very, very few people will be condemned to that fate.
p.s. Some Latter-Day Saints equate outer darkness with hell, but, IMHO, they are wrong and I am right. But I think I’ve described the mainstream view here.
I’m pretty sure I read a partial description in the Bible, that Hell is actually a cold and desolate place. Being no theologan, I’d like to know if that was meant to be a physical or emotional description. Anyone else read that? The Bible? You know, the Good Book? Oh heck.
As an agnostic/atheist (some days one, some days the other, I find this answer very interesting. In a sense I am condemning myself to this version of Hell as I beleive that when you die there is no eternal like.
When you die you are dead and that is that. It seems ironic that my belief that there is no life after death condemns me to something that I don’t believe in --Hell-- and yet this version of Hell is exactly what I beleive in --ceasing to exist.
Er…Eternal life…not eternal like
…just and updated version of MSFT3K.
The audience is composed of Fundamentalists, sitting on sugar clouds, strumming on harps and watching with glee the un-saved suffer eternal torment.
At least that’s what they think is happening. Ghod, in Its Infinite Sense of Humor is just providing them with what they would expect. It’s all an illusion, provided for their entertainment.
Eventually, they’ll get bored and start wandering around Heaven, looking for something else to do. They’ll eventually run into Ghandi or Plato or some other famous, non-saved person and suffer one incredible brain fart.
Christianity is the politics of eternal revenge.
It’s very simple, actually.
You go to sign on to the SDMB.
And there’s an automatic-forwarding link that connects you to the LBMB.
And they won’t let you log on.
And they have one of those open-a-new-window gimmicks that keeps you there whenever you try to back out.
And your reboot and on-off switches don’t work.
All you can do is sit there and read LBMB posts.
http://www.biblebb.com/files/tniv/HELL.NIV
They have files on all sorts of biblical subjects.
http://www.biblebb.com/tnivarea.htm
Take this entry a little below Hell, for example.
http://www.biblebb.com/files/tniv/HOMOSEX.NIV
I think this site could be very useful to me in the future…
But if all the televangelists go to Heaven, will Hell really be Hell after all?
No no theres a bible verse that says that all televangelists go to hell. So your stuck with them after all.
I was talking with my catechist about Hell a couple of months before I was confirmed.
We discussed the traditional “fire and brimstone” beliefs. I pointed out to him that if Hell is being utterly cast out of God’s presence, the eternal flames would be redundant.
He concurred.
Well, if Denis Leary is correct, you wear plaid bellbottoms, and have to listen to Shadow Dancing for eons, while sitting next to the Bay City Rollers.
Sounds bad to me.
There seems to be some question, though. Variant philosphers have stated that you either “go to a lake of fire and fry,” with only short respites every July 4th, or that it is “living without you,” though the “you” is unspecified.
Course, if you’re really interseted, you could get a ticket to Jamaca, and check it out for yourself . . .
I’m still trying to figure out if Heaven is a “place where nothing ever happens,” or “oo-oo, a place on Earth.”
Or possibly some combination of the two.
–
“So, Catholisism is just a placebo?”
I dunno. According to these verses of the Bible, the evil get resurrected along with the good.
Then according to these verses and these verses, the wicked will get cast into a furnace of fire. Much weeping and gnashing of teeth will ensue.
And then there’s that whole business in the book of Revelations about the lake of fire.
Ah, but here, the lake of fire is called the “second death”. So maybe the deal is you get resurrected, tossed in the lake of fire (“You woke me up for this???”), and then you are dead forever.
Meanwhile, Satan gets tormented “for ever and ever”.