Midget with a trombone appears.
(blasts several flatulent notes, and takes takes a deep breath)
Behold! ** Genghiz Lamp, The Undying, Trampler of Nations, Defiler of the Light, Master of the Ebon Night, He who feasts upon the entrails of the gods and hath assimilated their Wisdom, The Godslayer.**
His existence is everlasting!
(steps back to allow all to bask in my presence)
The Greatest to Ever Play the Game
Her Holy Beatitudiness, Empress of all She Surveys.
Or Holy Bea to my friends.
Very creative, guys! I like it… Keep them coming! 
“Moderator”.
Well, hell, I’m already THE Kabong, but y’all can call me El_Kabong the Immoderate if you need a bit more.
I was really going for El_Kabong the Well-Hung but Boyo Jim put an end to that.
Der Trihs the Mad, Opener of the Way and High Servant of the Elder Gods
Pimp Diogenes.
His Royal Scoobiness
Good Gad, you are asking for telescopic rifles, car bombs, even kamikaze bicycles.
Ruh roh!
What kind of a country would have a cartoon dog as a ruler…?
The Planetary Union of Pluto, of course !
“Introducing His Royal Scoobiness of the P.U.P. !”
A cartoon country, obviously. One soon to be under the iron thumb of Latveria, unless those meddling kids get in the way.
She Who is Good Enough.
“I regret to inform the populace that His Royal Scoobiness was assaulted with a newspaper this evening…”
I highly approve, and have given prolonged thought to becoming a sultan for the insanely-baggy-silk-pants aspect of things.
The Dude(tte).
Her Imperial Majesty, Queen Maharani, the Glorious Chatelaine and Sovereign Kythereia works as well.
How about you go for Malleus Caledonia, and I’ll simply pretend I don’t speak Latin. Win/Win!
My subject shall address me as “Bob”. Except in formal state occasions, in which my full title shall be used “Steve”.