I live in a 2nd floor flat with 2 other girls. We each have our own rooms. It’s starting to get a bit cool in the evenings and being that this is our first winter as a threesome Kim brought up that we would start using heating soon. Happy that she had brought it up I agreed as did our 3rd flatmate.
Kim went on to say that she guessed we would set the timer to go on before bed and turn of an hr or so later and then turn it on about 5 or so in the morning before we get up. I’ve never used a timer based heating system before and said that she could do that but I would need my heating on lall night as I am anemic (and been having treatment for several months) and even before that I just get cold very easily. Kim did not like this. She said that if I overrode the timer then her room would be cold in the morning. I suggested she have her heat on low all night. Kim didn’t like this either. The timer thing would be tricky at best anyway since our bedtimes vary and then I get up 2 hrs before everyone else in the morning.
Kim is a decent enough person and we get on in general but we have a lot of confrontations because
a) she has a horrible way of putting her feelings across i.e. THIS IS HOW IT IS GOING TO BE
I know this and flatmate 3 and I have discussed this on many occaisions and tried to gentley coax her into a more communal way of thinking but she continues to speak in this manner.
and then
b) I am very fierce. I don’t let people walk all over me and when they try to I tend to get my back up about it and be stubborn. You can assume that i went about this conversation the wrong way as well then (though i tried very hard to stay mellow).
So after some arguing and her accusing me of being selfish she said that if we didn’t do the timer way (i.e. “my way!”) then she wouldn’t ever use the heat and I could pay it all myself. She then turned to 3rd flatmate and tried to get her to pick sides which I thought was unfair to 3rd flatmate. She has this way of making things me vs her which I hate because it takes away from the issue at hand. 3rd flatmate said that we should try the timer and see how it goes.
I said that I was more than willing to try the timer but i expected flexibility both ways i.e. if I was cold I would exercise my right to turn the heat on in my home. Again she said I was being selfish because she would be cold in the morning. I then offered the compromise of if the bill was truly that much more than the previous months bill then I would pay the difference, no problems. Nope, she said, it’s the timer or nothing. Well, so much for compromise.
Am I out of line for wanting the control the temp in my room? I’ve never had this sort of heating, back in Canada we had thrermostats in each room so you could personalise it. I will not buy a portable heater as I would rather utlise the giant radiator in my room. I truly get cold at night and I have a very warm duvet and nice flannel jammies, it’s just one of those things I’ve had as long as I remember. My Nana said my uncle was the same, had to have his room nice and toasty or he couldn’t sleep.
Apparently, if the timer is on it controls ALL the radiators i.e. at 4:00 in the morning all the radiators would turn on to warm up the entire flat. If I want to have control of my own radiator on I would override the timer (telling her beforehand of course) meaning that all the radiators have to be turned on manually and turned off manually room by room.
To clarify, she objects to her own radiator not coming on automatically at 4:00 am to warm her up. If mine (and therefore all) were on manual she would have to wake up and turn hers on before getting up or leave it on the night before.
I would say, okay - fine! We’ll try the timer thing!
…
Then surreptitiously, I would go out and buy a nice electric blanket. I would snuggle up underneath said electric blanket all night, wrapped up in the warmth of knowing that my roommate is chipping in for the electricity bill.
She says she will be too hot and that it costs too much. I said I would pay the difference so I guess it is down to her being too warm.
Doctor Who, I have to admit I was briefly thinking of ways to hike up the electricity bill to make her pay higher but then 3rd flatmate would be as well and she doesn’t deserve it.
I still don’t get it. You live somewhere you call “the frozen tundra,” and yet some people think it’s perfectly normal to turn the heat off all night? Just how cold is it where you live, really?
Temperature is one of the most common roommate disputes. While she needs to understand that you shouldn’t get too cold, you should understand that some people overheat easily… etc etc etc.
Can you try to make do with an electric blanket, just to see how it works? I bet that having it on would warm up your whole room a little also, especially since it sounds like you are living in an apartment–and they tend to have quite small bedrooms.
I’m from the heat off at night school. You don’t even need it on for half an hour after you go to bed. If you’re anaemic, get a plumper duvet or, as mentioned, an electric blanket. Heating a house all night when the residents are all asleep - provided they have the right bedclothes - is a ridiculous waste of money and energy.
I lived with a roomate who didn’t want to turn on any heat ever. We also lived in a building where the heating was in the ceiling
That whole winter I heated just my room with a $12 portable space heater. Our energy costs were very reasonable even with the thing running at a low temp all night. You can figure out how much it costs per hour to run - most likely less than heating the entire flat.
While I understand how miserable it is to be cold, I really think that you’re being unreasonable here. A space heater or electric blanket is a cheap and individual solution. You should at least give it a try since you are the one with the problem.
Dude, refusing to buy a portable heater because you prefer the nostalgic memories of a radiator isn’t being very reasonable. Don’t throw around anemia as an excuse to get your way, and then refuse to buy a space heater or electric blanket. I live in an enormous 14 bedroom house in the city (college) and our temperature is constantly cranked up to 90* in the dead of winter so girls can prance around in hotpants and wife beaters. As you can imagine, our gas bill is ridiculous. So, if I was in your situation, Id be one upset roomie.
I can tell your from the UK** jjimm**! When I was there I froze to death! No one had heat at night. But I admit we’re pretty wasteful here.
Even with an electric blanket, you still have to get up to pee! Yikes!
I think electric heaters can be sort of dangerous.
Where do you live? Is it really cold there? Can you all agree on a compromise temperature? Unless it’s a pretty warm climate, I can’t believe you turn the heat completely off.
It hasn’t even happened yet and she’s already bitching about costs and whatnot.
I’d say there is more going on with her than the heat. Is she mad about something?
Be careful with space heaters, people. A girl I went to highschool with’s house burned down around Christmas due to one. I drove by it afterwards and it was horrible. Luckily only the dog died (lucky because none of the humans did). You can be careful but accidents can still happen.
My roommate and I actually have not fought over the air yet. We got in the habit of turning the air off in the morning because we are both gone all day and if the apartment is hot when we get home, turn it back on. Lately it’s been pretty temperate and it hasn’t been on at all.
I grew up in a house that was always cold. My mom swore their room got all the heat first and air last (rrriiiiight) so she was either hot when I was breaking icicles in my room or cold when I was sweating in my sleep. So I am used to rolling with the punches somewhat when it comes to indoor temperatures. Because hey, if I’m at home I can at least put on a hoodie and socks or throw on gym shorts and a tank top to deal.
I think if she wants to have a heater on a timer, she should go buy a portable one that has a timer built into it. If you are paying to live there, you should get control of the heat in your room whenever you want it, especially if it can be controlled room by room.
:o