“The devil has told you that! The devil has told you that…!”, cried
the little man, and in his anger he plunged his right foot so
deep into the earth that his whole leg went in, and then in
rage he pulled at his left leg so hard with both hands that
he tore himself in two. Its said that as he did, a didgeridoo slowly started hum in the distance. And then it was as if the very air began to whisper words no human ear could possibly withstand…
“Lets go Outback tonight…”
Many guys you meet are probably willing to do it for Australia on a daily basis. Even if they don’t say it out loud. Or are from Australia. Men are so altruisitc!
Kinda non-sequitur, but it still cracks me up:
http://www.satirewire.com/news/jan02/australia.shtml
*“Australia came through here screaming curses at us to let them through,” said Ernesto Carnal, who guards the locks at the entrance to the Panama Canal. “We said they would not fit, so they demanded to speak with a manager. When I go to find Mr. Caballos, they sneak the whole continent through.”
When Caballos shouted to the fleeing country that it had not paid, Australia “accidentally” backed up and took out every nation in the region, as well as the northern third of Venezuela. They then made up a cheery song about it. *
Oh gawd, that’s funny…
You know what? We’d have a go at that after sufficient ale. 
I read that as Mer kin at first, you know like Merfolk (Mermaids/Mermen), I was quite confused… unless you have something you’re hiding from us…
I knew from the beginning that he wasn’t a merkin
No kidding! I read it aloud to my husband and got to use my Aussie accent! Woo! I NEVER get to use that one! I did the Spanish accent, too, except that one’s not as good.