So last night I’m watching the very end of the commentary track to Easter Parade when I hear a knock at my screen door. I got up, went to the door, turned on the orange, bug-repelling door light and called, “Who is it?” No response. I peer through the peephole and see a middle-aged white guy, kinda creepy looking. No one I recognize. He knocks again, I call again, “Who is it?” It’s possible he can’t hear me through the heavy inside door (which is dead-bolted), but I’m not opening the door to someone I don’t know. I was made more nervous by the fact that I wasn’t, er, fully dressed at the time. I went into the bedroom and put my bathrobe on. Then I went back to the peephole and checked. He’s still there, waiting. He knows I’m in here because I turned the light on. Finally after about five minutes (!) I watched him leave…he’s my new (well, about ten days) next-door neighbor! Whose name I do not know and have said hello to exactly once. What did he want? I wasn’t too loud. It wasn’t too late (this was about 8 in the evening). What did he want? To borrow a cup of sugar? To say hello and invite me over (not that I would have gone into his apartment)? Why did he stay there so long?
I know I did the right thing in the absence of more information about the guy, but I’m still ooged out about this.
While I don’t blame the OP at all for being cautious, in what way was it “bad-not-normal behavior”? The guy knocked on the door, and the OP says herself that he may not have heard her asking who it was.
2:00 in the morning, peeking in through windows? “Bad-not-normal behavior.” 8:00 in the evening, knocking on her front door? Perfectly normal behavior. Could be any of a million perfectly acceptable reasons why he was there.
As to why he waited so long? Obviously he saw the light come on, figured someone was inside, and was just waiting for whoever it was to get dressed or whatever.
Meant to say 'Obviously he saw the light come on, figured someone was inside, and was PROBABLY just waiting for whoever it was to get dressed or whatever."
Freekin’ thank you! This irrational fear of perfectly normal shit really chaps my hide. He wasn’t a stranger. You KNOW he just moved in. Maybe he was having a problem with something and needed a referral. It is 100% normal to knock on a person’s door and wait for them to answer. What do you think he was going to do to you? I swear…no wonder people are so fucked up and on all kinds of mental health drugs. They freak themselves out over absolutely nothing. You should go over there and apologize and ask if there’s anything you can do for him.
Keeeee-rist.
This was 8 o’clock in the evening, not exactly late, and probably not even dark yet. I don’t think it’s something to get all worried about. While I don’t blame you for not opening the door for someone you don’t recognize, I really don’t see it as abnormal behavior for someone to knock on his neighbor’s door.
As to why he stood there so long, I’d guess that he thought someone was going to answer once the light came on. He’s probably wondering why you acting so strangely, turning on the light then not opening the door.
Personally, I open the door to strangers all the time, even at night. I guess I should be more careful, but I’ve never really thought of it as such a risk. Especially since the doors not locked in the first place.
Yeah, the OP’s behavior was definitely stranger. I would have waited (though probably not ten minutes) if someone had turned on their porch light (and I’m guessing this orange bug light is kinda like a porch light) because to me that’s a signal that the person inside hears that you’re there and is coming right down. And like, it was eight pm, that’s hardly too late to go to someone’s door. He probably just wanted to meet his new neighbors. Nice first impression, dude.
Based on the OP I think it’s likely the poor man probably went back to his house muttering “What a bizarre neighbor I’ve got. Turns on the porch light, so I stand waiting for her, but won’t answer the door! Better tell the kids to steer clear of her.”
My mom is like that (like the OP, I mean). A car she doesn’t recognize parks anywhere on the block, she’s at the window. “Who is that? Why are they parking there?” Someone knocks at the door and the woman HIDES in the bathroom.
As far as I know, she’s not really mentally ill. She just has this quirk about people in or around her house.
My first reaction was that the OP was being ridiculous. Then I remembered what it was like when I was living alone, and a stranger would knock on the door. But then again, there’s no way in hell I would’ve turned the porch light on and let them know I was home, because the porch light would’ve already been on. It makes it harder for people to peek in your windows.
I think it was normal behaviour on the neighbour guy’s part - to knock on a neighbour’s door at 8pm is pretty normal. But since you are (presumably) female, alone, without a reasonably-sized dog (presumably), then yeah, you behaved normally. If I was home alone without our dog at night, I don’t open the door unless it’s someone I know. We know the neighbours in our case as we’ve lived in the same place for 15 years.
A young man, a person who owns an Alsatian, or a girl whose boyfriend, husband or dad was home, would normally open the door, I guess. But you were alone at night and you don’t know the guy. It’s a judgement call.
I wouldn’t have answered the door either. People just don’t go and introduce themselves to their new neighbors around here. It’s different in other communities, but not in any I’ve lived in since I was seven. We do introduce ourselves when we run into each other, outside, but the welcome wagon never made it this far west, it seems.
The two times I’ve broken the don’t answer the door unless you’re expecting someone rule, I’ve regretted it. The first was my new neighbor who turned out to be the town drunk. He wanted me to come over to his new place and paaaaar-tay. It took a good five minutes to get him to go away and he came back three more times, repeating his invitation and shouting through the door: ‘jesh in cayshe jou shanged yer mine lil lady.’
The second time, I broke the rule by mistake. I was expecting a friend and didn’t check the peep hole. It was some guy selling candy who seemed extremely interested in my decorating, the way he was visually inventorying everything I owned. He had pushed himself half-way through the door, even though I was telling him to get the hell out because I was calling the police. Luckily, my friend came up the stairs right about then and escorted that pushy ‘salesman’ to the sidewalk. It turned out the police had heard of him working the area, but hadn’t caught up to him. I live in a good neighborhood in a medium sized city, not east side LA.
I don’t like having this rule, but it seems prudent for now.
1 - Needed to call the new landlord who had recently bought the building but didn’t have his number. Asked the upstairs neighbours if they had it.
2 - Broke my key off in the front door lock. Asked the same neighbours if I could use their phone to call a locksmith.
3 - Different apartment. Neighbour knocking on my door. He had locked his keys in the laundry room and wanted to borrow mine to let himself in to get them.
I’m wondering what the hell kind of door does the op have that it couldn’t be heard through? (If that was indeed the case)
Eh, I’m with the OP on this one. I believe you should always go with your gut instinct in cases like this.
I also have to agree with Astro though, The new neighbor probably has the OP marked down on his “weird’o” list.
If I were the OP I’d go over there the next day and explain the situation. If not for anything but to satisfy my curiousity as to what the hell he wanted last night.
