"Sorry, my suspension of disbelief doesn't stretch that far." (Open Spoilers)

How am I supposed to know it’s movies that are being discussed? And do you know how many movies there are? A lot. So if I can magically figure out that it is movies that are being discussed, if there’s any movie that I don’t want spoiled, then I better not read the thread. OK, not 100% useless, more like 99%. :rolleyes:

Yes. That’s exactly what I want. Or maybe not. Maybe the use of spoiler boxes might fix things. I believe the board has this feature.

Or maybe I’m the only one that finds it kind of dumb to have a thread with spoiler warnings where you’re forced to read the thread (and spoilers) to figure out what is being spoiled. It’s only slightly less dumb to narrow what is being spoiled down to movies.

I’ve got two wtf?? points in Die Hard 2.

I can understand the pilots blindly obeying who they think are the air traffic controllers–until the first plane crashes and burns. After that, I think even the meekest airline pilot would be sitting in the cockpit with some serious questions that he would want answered. But no, they just go on circling, not trying to figure out what’s going on . . . Now that’s discipline!!

Oh, and about that first airplane crash. Seeing as how the pilots guided themselves in using the second airplane crash, what’s to stop them from using the first to let themselves down, especially if they suspected something was up in the tower.

But I don’t really mind stuff from movies like Die Hard. The whole point of these films is to watch without thinking. No, I save my wrath for more serious thought-provoking movies like Traffic.

OK, your star witness’s devastating testimony against the drug lord has been mysteriously postponed. Do you dress him in a bullet-proof vest and hustle him into a souped-up van surrounded by bodyguards Tim McVeigh-style? Nope, you just casually saunter into the unprotected parking lot to the car sitting all by its lonesome in a nice shady secluded spot. Then when the witness decides he wants to walk to the protected location in broad daylight, you merrily traipse down the sidewalk, and when all hell breaks loose, you let your partner run to the car without bothering to think “Gee, I wonder whether whoever decided to try shooting our witness in the head think to screw with our car, too.” Yeesh, guys, why don’t you just turn this guy over to the Second City Theater. He’d have a better chance of getting through!!

Then they take their star witness to the same fricking hotel and let a total stranger serve him breakfast!! And they have the nerve to look surprised when the witness finally gets whacked. No one’s this incompetent!!

The only reason this incompetence exists is to further the storyline. With realistic cops, these subplots never would have gotten off the ground. I need drama in my movies as much as the next guy, but I get pissed off every time one of these screw-ups turns a riveting thriller into yet another episode of Johnny MacGuffin And His Fuckup Squad.

I myself found myself muttering “Scum. You guys are all UTTER scum. :mad: Someone should call in ninja assassins to slit all your throats.”

Now that somebody mentioned Star Trek…

I can believe in a giant starship with dozens of decks full of people zipping through space at the speed of light. I can believe in aliens that all happen to look like people wearing lots of makeup. But one thing I can never suspend my disbelief enough to accept is the idea that there’s no money in the future. Humankind has evolved past the point where we need material possessions? Uh huh. Right. No, I guarantee you that even if money were completely phased out officially, something else that serves the exact same purpose would be created, replicators or not. And there’s no television in the future? Give me a break.

I remember watching The Core when it first came out on DVD. I was fine until the second frame.

:smiley:

You don’t work in IT do you? Most people still use simple passwords.

Case in point: A few years back I was hired to access a clients email because they had forgotten the password. It took me three guesses.

I know one guy who uses his wedding date as his ATM PIN and passwords,. but its not for the reasons you think.

He has the date as his PIN/passwords so he’ll remember his anniversary - not the other way around. heh heh

My entry doesn’t involve guns, planes, explosions, or car chases. I have no experience with them so I’m easily fooled.

The last time I went “Yeah, right” was a Bette Davis movie, The Corn is Green. The coal miners are walking by her house after 12 hours underground, and they’re singing.

It wasn’t just the fact that they were singing when they should have been too tired to talk, but they were singing beautifully. They sounded like the Vienna Boys Choir.

The same thing happened to me last season for 24: for some strange reason the
head agent at CTU (Samwise Gamgee) fails to report his security badge as missing
and uncontrolled; even though he mentions it to a colleague, NOBODY bothers to
disable the badge, DESPITE the fact that his sister just got killed and the badge
is apparently missing.

15 minutes later a baddie uses said badge to sneak into CTU and set off a nerve
gas canister, killing about half the staff.

I just refused to believe that an organization supposedly as competent as CTU
is alleged to be could fail to have an automatic procedure to lock down lost badges.
They couldn’t possibly be that bloody stupid, but they were. Didn’t watch but a
few minutes here and there of the remaining episodes (and from what I gather
I didn’t miss much other than a few regulars buying it).

That doesn’t compare to when she punched the shark.

(I was at a friend’s house and there was free alcohol.)

While that is an acceptable excuse for waking up naked in bed with your friend’s mother, that is NOT an acceptable excuse for watching TR or TR2. Period.

This is the same movie where the Bad Guy could have easily pulled off his entire plan if he’d just not introduced The Good Guys to each other to create The Ultimate Superhero Force…right? I mean, he had everything he wanted BEFORE THE MOVIE BEGAN!.

-Joe

In my defence, the only reason I caught that part was how bad that particular part was. The group watching it called us over, we all made fun of it, then we went back to playing Drunken Cranium.

It was just more fun to put it the way I did. :smiley:

You forgot the cherry on top: The plane they escape from (which they must do as it has been sabotaged, losing its last drop of fuel) crashes unmanned into a mountainside, and, although now completely bereft of highly-flammable combustibles, explodes in a fireball of such size that it apparently disintegrates.

Well, all those phone booths in the airport did say Pac-Bell… :stuck_out_tongue:

Coming back to my own thread with pie…

A year or two ago there was a miniseries in Marvel, Wolverine: Enemy of the State. In it, everybody’s favorite Canuck was abducted by Hydra, brainwashed into an assassin (well, a wind-up assassin, as opposed to his usual inner-directed one :-)) and sent out against other super-heroes. SHIELD got the word out to the rest of the mask community, which hunkered down in abject terror of a guy whose major power is knives thta grown out of his hands. And his first major assignment was against…

the Fantastic Four.

The Fantastic Four.

And he kicked their asses.

I groaned in horror. I mean, really. Wolverine against Ben Grimm, I can see that being a fight; Ben probably likes Wolvie and would be reluctant to go all out. But Wolverine–whose major offensive power is that he GROWS KNIVES OUT OF THE BACK OF HIS HANDS–versus the Human Torch? Terrifying the Torch isn’t going to make things better for Logan, it’ll make it worse, since the Johnny will likely think “Damn, that Wolverine is scary. Thank God I’ve got long range flame powers and can fly, so I can roast him from a hundred feet in the air.” And you can’t tell me that Reed Richards, presented with the problem of a brainwashed Wolverine trying to kill him, his partners, and his kids wouldn’t say, “Hmm…guess I’ll have to build a big freaking magnet to take advantage of all that metal in his skeleton.”

And Wolverine versus SUE STORM? That’s not a fight; it’s a brief, brutal, hairy Canadian ass-whopping. The only way Wolverine survives is if he hasn’t been a credible threat to the rest of the team before Sue gets to him, so she’s feeling merciful. But if he’s hurt Johnny (the most likely to take damage, I think)–or if he’s come within a hundred yards of her kids–it’s gonna be an ugly fight.

The whole miniseries went like that. Pissed me off to no end.

An RAF Lancaster Bomber tail gunner- Flt. Sgt. Nicholas Alkemande- jumped from his burning plane in 1944 and fell 20,000ft without a parachute.

He landed in a stand of snow-covered fir trees, the branches of which broke his fall, and then landed in the snow drift at the bottom of the trees.

He twisted his ankle and broke his leg, but otherwise was able to walk (hobble) away from the incident, and was treated as a celebrity by the Germans when they captured him as a POW. So yeah, It’s not outside the realms of possibility.

My suspension of disbelief issues usually involve the incorrect use of firearms… I can overlook revolvers with 30 shot magazines and semi-autos that never run out of ammo, but it really annoys me when someone’s making an historical piece and they have people armed with guns that didn’t exist at the time.

The two most blatant examples of this are in Zulu and The Blue Max.

There’s a sequence in Zulu when the British are firing volleys and advancing on the Zulu- but it’s clear that they’re using bolt-action rifles (Lee-Enfield Mk Is), when the Lee-Metford/Enfield rifles weren’t adopted until 1889 (10 years after the movie was set), and not in general issue until about 1895 or so.
The explanation, apparently, was that they’d run out of .450/577 calibre blanks for the Martini-Henry rifles (and if you look during the later scenes of the film, you can indeed see that the actors are simply dry-firing the guns and simulating the recoil, with the gunshot dubbed in later)- but the .303 calibre Martini-Enfield is externally almost idential (certainly close enough not to be noticed in the film) to the Martini-Henry, there’s plenty of them about in South Africa and the UK, and blank ammo is readily available.

The Blue Max has a sequence where the German Army is marching across No-Man’s Land in WWI… armed with Lee-Enfield No 4 Mk II rifles! (The Lee-Enfield No 4 Mk II wasn’t introduced until 1949, and was never used by the Germans). Of course, the reason for this is that the “Germans” in the film are really the Fianna Fail (Irish Army), and they were so equipped when the film was made.

Indiana Jones & The Temple Of Doom also has a sequence right at the end, when the Indian Army show up and start shooting the evil cultists- again, armed with Lee-Enfield No 4 Mk I rifles which weren’t introduced until 1939 (well after the film was ser), not readily available until 1941/1942, and most importantly, were never issued to the Indian Army at the time (who were using Ishapore-made SMLE Mk III* rifles).

Lawrence of Arabia also has the Turks armed with SMLE Mk III rifles for some inexplicable reason (Should have been Mauser M98 rifles), and Lawrence himself has a seemingly inexhaustible supply of Webley Mk VI revolvers- which, ironically, he is not known to have used during the Arab Revolt, preferring instead the Colt M1911, Mauser C96 “Broomhandle”, and the Colt Single Action Army. Still, the Webley looks right, and it’s my favourite handgun, so I figured I could let that pass. :smiley:

The Bad Guy Explaining His Plans To The Hero thing never works outside James Bond movies, either…

Thus far you’re the only one in this thread.

I’m sorry it can’t be narrowed down for you to your satisfaction, but since the OP mentions several genres and media (comic books, novels, television, etc…), there’s little more I can do than add a generic spoiler warning to the title. I didn’t feel the need to list the various forms of entertainment that would be spoiled because, hopefully, posters will read the OP and understand that anything is up for grabs. And I suppose spoiler boxes would have been helpful, true, but by the time I got around to reading the thread, several movies and whatnot had already been spoiled. It seemed easier to edit the thread title rather than go back and edit in spoilers for each post.

In my senior-year (high school) physics class, one of our projects was to use the laws of physics to analyze an incredulous scene in a movie and explain whether or not it could’ve happened in the real world and why or why not. I chose a clip from the last Bond film (yeah, that last one that just came out–well, maybe the one right before) where Bond got in a car and was chased across an iceberg or some other sheet of ice. His car flipped over and then he fired rockets from the car to propel himself away from the villain’s car. After doing lots of equations, I found that the car’s motion was firmly grounded in the real-world laws of physics from start to finish. (Or really close, at least.)

Kind of a hijack, I know. But an interesting story I thought I’d share.

How about the movie “Hitch”? You can believe Will Smith could get Eva Mendes–they’re both very attractive–and you could believe an overweight schlub could date someone who’s attractive–but the main plotline was about one of those fat sitcom schlubs dating a superstar billionairess, a gorgeous woman who had just dumped a European prince or something. Mr. Schlub called on Smith’s character as his dating coach, and they spent all kinds of time trying to get over his verbal and physical clumsiness, his horrendous dancing and his formidable nervousness, but never once did Smith’s character mention the guy’s weight. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a progressive, liberal guy, but COME ON. The dude was the most junior and incompetent member of the hot billionaire’s financial advising team (this was established by the conference scene) and he was scoring with one of the most beautiful and richest women in the world.

However, one thing I loved Hitch for–and I ended up seeing it four times through no fault of my own, the latest only because it was better than the alternative, “squadron beautification” (cleaning up pigeon shit and trying not to get your cammos dirty or else you’ll hear about it a full two years after your discharge or death, whichever comes first)–was the fantastic first exchange between the characters of Smith and Mendes in the bar, and then the subsequent cat-and-mouse between them. Smith was a smooth criminal, and it wasn’t a zipless fuck with no effort whatsoever–dude laid down some serious lines, and then went on to work his ass off to overcome major date blunders and an unfairly tarnished reputation. Anyone who’s ever had a bad date could really empathize with him, even as you thought, “This cat’s forgotten more than I’ll ever know about reproductive success”.

Some movies push it, but you’d be surprised how ignorant most people are about computer security. A teacher at my high school had all his students’ work deleted when he introduced the students to his visiting cousin…whose name was also same teacher’s password. The teacher had it comin’, BTW–he was a racist asshat who was highly suspicious of us computer geeks and graded according to his assumptions in both areas rather than to the quality of the work. Anyway, some people just don’t get how computer passwords work. I was once in a project group at same school where I was in charge of the group’s email account and I spent all day thinking up a vaguely-pronounceable password (considering the group members I had to work with) that wouldn’t be easily guessed and would be immune to a dictionary search…when I came up with it and gave it to them handwritten on paper (again, there was no way I could expect them to remember it) and they were all pissed that I didn’t make the password “something simple like ‘Wednesday’ or ‘flower’” and just tell them. :: We had a “rival” group, too, who was already stealing our ideas and included a girl I knew to be both academically ruthless and an Internet security wizardress. I gave up, switched to another group and helped build a miniature roller coaster out of plastic tubes.

I was thinking about this recently–in The Replacements, a huge squad of scab *ex-*football players who worked everyday (mostly hourly) jobs and never had the wherewithal for voice lessons, sang “I Will Survive” together in perfect harmony in jail, where supposedly there were other things on their minds.

Granted, the scene had a Broadway-musical feel to it, and it’s fun in its context, but looking back on it it’s pretty tough to believe. Ever heard someone who’s dedicated his life to sports try to sing a rock hit? If you’re ever in San Diego with access to cable TV, check out baseball play-by-play guy Matt Vasgersian’s Rush covers after exciting plays.

I have a problem with the steam locomotives used in movies. It’s not such a problem now with computer generated effects, but I’ve seen quite a few westerns using comparatively modern locomotives with an old fashioned (and innacurate) smokestack and headlight stuck on. Some of these engines are 50 years out of date. It’s like using Cessnas in a WWI movie.

I’ve seen complaints in other threads about the recent Harrison Ford film “Firewall” that mostly poke holes in the technical aspects of the electronic gizmos, but I’m not a technical guy and the big problems as I saw them were the simple ones. Why does a family with a child who has a potentially life-threatening peanut allergy have a package of peanut-based cookies in its pantry? It also annoyed me that a major plot point was based on the bad guy’s decision to kidnap not just human members of the family, but the dog as well.

In honour of a young relative’s outraged exclamation, this sort of thing is forever referred to by me as the “That would NEVER happen!!!” factor.

I have to say, much as it truly pains me to do so, “Vertigo” leaps to mind here. As Robin Wood observes in “Hitchcock Revisited”, I can buy the fact that Jimmy Stewart’s Vertigo might stop him climbing the tower to save the woman he loves. I can buy the fact that he is so devasted by what happens that he runs away from the scene rather than wait to see if Madelaine is dead/ explain things to the cops.

What I can’t buy one little bit is that the Murderer could plan an elaborate scheme which hinges precisely on Jimmy Stewart doing all of the above. If he’d stayed, he have instantly spotted it was a different woman.

Also, not only do I want to get in on the groundfloor of the fastgrowing Puppygod religion, I am keen to see more exciting episodes of Johnny MacGuffin And His Fuckup Squad.

Now there you go. See? People often ask me why the SDMB is the bestest, hottest Board in the known universe by a country mile, and there’s your answer. This is where you can get sound advice about how to use a clarinet to hit a hippo. In a thread that isn’t even about clarinets. Or hippos. Truly, the hive mind here has awesome power and knows no limits. Major respect to InvisibleWombat for (a) having such information to offer and (b) thinking to offer it.

Mmm. ‘The best way to attack a hippo with a musical instrument?’. It’s almost worth its own GQ thread.

Hey, don’t do it! I said almost.