Aw, Bumb, I always read your posts. It’s just that this left me speechless. Truly!
I’m sorry. You can get an extra piece of birthday cake, if I get a birthday cake. OK?
Maybe this time the hamsters won’t eat my post! Sheesh!
Birthdays, Baptism and Burping. I’ve done all three!
I went to a baptism for two kiddies on Sunday. It was an Episcopal baptism, cause it was at an Episcopal church. So technically I went to two baptisms on Sunday. It lasted almost two hours cause in addition to baptisms, the usual Episcopal church stuff went on.
I propose that on FairyChatMom’s we toast her by downing a slug of Geritol and putting on some Ben-Gay. 
I have a summer birthday. As a kid I didn’t really want parties cause I got to run around all day doing whatever I wanted then go home and get cake and loot! What more could I want? Ok, now that I’m all growed up, I’d like to run around all day doing whatever I want then go home and have burly men bring me beer and cookies. However, that ain’t gonna happen.
Rue since it was an open bar, what kinda drinking did the little burpers prefer? Did you hide the good stuff? After they got all liquored up, I’m sure they burped and probably did see monsters chasing em.
I think they have a church like this; they’re called Unitarians or something like that. 
I propose that I slug YOU and not give you any Ben-Gay to make it feel better. You wise-acre! 
Sweetie you ain’t gots to give me any I’ve Ben-Gay forever!
Naw, the Unitarians sing politically correct modern songs and usually meet in a building that, although specifically built for the Unitarian congregation, looks like a converted grocery store. Don’t get me wrong–it’s a wonderful religion, um, group, but pageantry and mystery they ain’t got.
They do light candles a lot though, which ties in with our birthday thread.
Swampy, darlin’, making bad puns is my job.
Well, if we have the next Portadope in that church basement again, I’ll bring my monks robe and do some mysterious things if you’ll bring some hymnals. They must include Onward Christian Soldiers and Nearer My God to Thee. Oh, and Amazing Grace. I really like that one. Maybe we can have Czarcasm do a short sermon. Or maybe not. But at any rate we’ll have the usual potluck!
Oh, and I forgot to thank Kallessa and FCM for reading my posts too. You’re both peaches!
My best friend’s dog is named Peaches. I wasn’t sure whether to be insulted or flattered. But you couldn’t have known about the dog (you don’t know Betty, do you??) and it is a cute pup, so I won’t be insulted. Just don’t let it happen again…
Hey, if we’re nonbelievers, can’t we have any songs we’d like? I’d much rather sing Ramones songs. Potlucks are cool, though, as long as nobody brings in those freaky jello salads.
However, I do claim all gay related bad puns. After all I am the official token MMP boy who likes boys.
:Arrives breathless:
I’m sorry, I’m a little late. With the boards being down and the weather here, this is the first chance I’ve had catch up you. Glad to see everyone doing fine, and Happy Belated Birthday to Soupo.
Does this mean Hell is beige? Or just Lutheran Hell? I envision it as an endless government building, with two tones of taupe on the walls and flickering flourescent lights. Bleah!! :insert puking smiley here:
I agree with you, and, IMO, people need pageantry and a sense of something greater than they are in their lives. They like it. The church used to provide that, but not any more. I suppose it’s to seem more accessable, but I think you could have both; why not?
And, FWIW, although I was raised Seventh-Day Adventist, I don’t practice any religion, haven’t been inside a church for years, and the last time I was in one it was for something secular.
If we are putting together a SDMB/MMP choir, I want in, please. I don’t read music, but I have a good ear and a nice, warm alto.
Hmm, that got longer than I meant to make it. Just making up for lost time, I guess! 
Oh, wow, I forgot that was my sig! The board adds the sig automatically now?
FCM, you don’t have a friend with a dog named ‘Bee’s Knees’ do you? In that case you can be the Bee’s Knees and Kallessa can be the Cats Pajamas. Or you can trade with each other. The appellations, not your pajamas. Unless you like that sorta thing. Except Kallessa doesn’t wear pajamas. (She told me. I don’t know from personal experience, you pervs.)
Slortar, The Ramones are cool if we get to sing some Jimmy Buffet songs too. But I warn you, my singing voice sounds like a bucket full of bullfrogs.
Wintermute, I envision Lutheran Hell as a potluck with nothing but jello salads. Oh wait, they like jello salads. They may very well have invented jello salads. Never mind.
What color is taupe anyway?
I don’t wear jammies either, although when it gets cold, I’ve been known to don a sleep shirt. It’s really just a big, baggy t-shirt. It keeps my shoulders warm which is good because my shoulders don’t always stay covered at night.
My MIL isn’t Lutheran, but she loves to make jello salads. She serves them as side dishes in place of vegetables. I guess the “salad” part is her justification. I’m not a big fan of jello salads. Especially the kinds that have cottage cheese mixed in them. They’re just plain scary.
And you’ll still sound better than me. I’ve managed the previously-thought-inconceivable feat of being simultaneously tone, pitch and rhythm deaf. That’s why I chose punk rock.
I thought that’s what porn was for.
I like jello salad! Well, one particular jello salad at least. You combine orange jello, orange sherbert, whipped cream (not Cool Whip, nope, real whipped cream, only, thank you very much) and mandarian orange slices and it turns out yummy! So there! Way to decadent to end up in Lutheran Hell. Or end down in Lutheran Hell if you want to be specific about it.
Bumbazine, as I have never seen a cat in pajamas, I’m thinking that the Cat’s Pajamas would be very like my own, so I’ll keep that appelation, and FCM can be the cutest Bee’s Knees that have even been.
Not just government offices–I work in a seemingly endless building with industrial grey/green walls and bad lighting. If this is Hell, I’m just not going. Nope. Not me, you can send me someplace else, but I’m not spending eternity in badly lit hallways.
Similar to beige, but generally slightly cooler in tone and generally slightly darker.
Does that help, at all? No? Ask your wife, I’ll bet she knows.
I hear you; those lights make your skin look terrble! Can you imagine? Pasty and washed-out for eternity, and no lip gloss in sight! :Shudder:
Well, maybe for you. The rest of us need more than silicone implants to think we’ve seen God.
Taupe: beige, only less flamboyant.
Teal: greeny-blue.
Peacock: bluey-green.
Puce: there is no puce.