This has not, however, stopped their earnings from pushing back the boundaries of pure hypermathematics, and their chief research accountant has recently been appointed Professor of Neomathematics at the University of Maximegalon, in recognition of both his General and Special Theories of Disaster Area Tax Returns, in which he proves that the whole fabric of the space-time continuum is not merely curved, it is in fact totally bent.
Yes, Brad, it’s something we ourselves have been working on for quite some time. But it seems our friend here has found a means of perfecting it. A device which is capable of breaking down solid matter and then projecting it through space and, who knows, perhaps even time… itself!
‘Matter can’t be transported at the speed of light but energy can. Therefore, during a time shift transformation, matter is converted to energy then condenses back. In other words all the molecules in your body have been changed from matter to energy then back again.’
“I signed aboard this ship to practice medicine, not to have my atoms scattered back and forth across space by this gadget.”
“Go go, Gadget Skates!”
Let’s go and explore.
Space: the final frontier. These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise . Its five-year mission: to explore strange new worlds. To seek out new life and new civilizations. To boldly go where no man has gone before!
We have to establish our credentials as an explorocracy; so to survive and rule ourselves, we have to explore.
The clustering quaddies looked genuinely shocked. Greenlaw said, “A false engineer’s license? That would be unsafe.”
“If it’s from the place I think, you could get a false neurosurgeon’s license to go with it. Or any other job you cared to pretend to have, without going through all that tedious training and testing and certification.”
Everyone on the mission had two specialties. I’m a botanist and mechanical engineer; basically, the mission’s fix-it man who played with plants. The mechanical engineering might save my life if something breaks.
Einstein said that change ripples out from the first mutation. We fix that and everything else falls back into place.
That accident produced an entirely new gene-pattern in the parents of this child, one which developed the child into a winged human. He’s what biologists technically call a mutant.
It was an assassination attempt using soltoxin gas, when my mother was pregnant with me. But it’s not—” a mutation, his thought hiccoughed through the wellworn grooves—how many times had he explained this?
It was impossible for her to tell the woman who had fought off the attempted assassination of the Protector’s entire family with her bare hands and killed Steadholder Burdette in single combat on live, planet-wide HD, that she couldn’t even make herself punch someone in the nose!
Guys, apparently I know kung fu.
Venusian aikido. Temporarily paralyzes, while also being fundamentally harmless.Very clever, those Venusian nuns
S’okay, Nick. I got into a fistfight, blew up a door, and got to use duct tape twice…it’s a good day to die.
“Yes, of course duct tape works in a near-vacuum. Duct tape works anywhere. Duct tape is magic and should be worshiped.”
Humanity’s gift to the universe. Duct Tape.
“Human’s are unique. There is no other race in the universe that would lie about having invisible thread.”