Spinach can send email

Will cucumbers be next or carrots?

Kale mail.

Yeah, but all it wants to talk about is chlorophyll.

It uses all the lettuce of the alphabet.

But seriously, sounds like humans just point a sensor at the spinach and measure changes to the chemistry. Talk about tabloidy headlines.

From: Spinach
To: Popeye
Subject: Use a damn can opener

Tweeting tomatoes?
Tiktoking taro?
Facebooking fruits friending each other?
Myspace for mustard greens(cause mustard greens, rock out with your…leaves out)
And lastly, perhaps leastly, snapchat for snap beans

YouTubers

I’ve always held that plant’s “think”. Simply put, sunflowers feel discomfort when facing away from the sun, and to relieve the pain, they choose to turn toward the sun.

Baked beans. (“Spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, baked beans and spam”.)

When the spinach roots detect the presence of nitroaromatics in groundwater, a compound often found in explosives like landmines, the carbon nanotubes within the plant leaves emit a signal.

There’s one problem with using spinach to detect landmines. Who’s going to plant the spinach on a field where there may be landmines? :boom:

Everyone seems to be overlooking the fact that the spinach was created to detect explosives.

If I read a sci-fi story about wi-fi enabled bomb-sniffing spinach, I would have thought it to be just too silly to be taken seriously. I’m also pretty sure I never once imagined that I would ever type out the phrase wi-fi enabled bomb-sniffing spinach.

If we’re starting to weaponize vegetables, I think the future is less Facebooking Fruit and more along the lines of Tactical Tomatoes. Spy Spuds also comes to mind. Is the CIA going to start sending fruit baskets to the embassies of our enemies?

They have other ways of expressing themselves.

Bomb de Terres

(credit Tommy Chong, in The Corsican Brothers.)

Living in a world where spinach can send emails…

(Credit @misterbrilliant)

But can it use Spinach Salad Layer?

I have a feeling the collective VQ of the veggies will mean the quality of stuff posted on social media will go up, not down, once they start to displace the humans v2.0 chimps.

Reminds me of this story

Melbourne gave 70,000 trees email addresses so people could report on their condition. But instead people are writing love letters, existential queries and sometimes just bad puns.

I don’t believe any of the trees reply though

Sunflowers don’t have nerves and thus don’t feel discomfort; they don’t have brains and thus can’t “choose.” There’s an ecological advantage to sunflowers turning: flowers facing the sun get warm and are thus more frequently visited by bees and butterflies.

And I hate to be a killjoy, but spinach doesn’t send emails, either. Infrared sensors detect signals from the spinach’s carbon nanotubes when its roots encounter explosives in the groundwater, and the cameras send an email.

Much as I love the Disney version of nature–I’m still waiting for bluebirds to come dress me in the morning–this ain’t it.

So they enjoy turning towards the sun! :smiley:

:sunflower:
:sun_with_face: :honeybee: :butterfly:  

 

I’m so glad to learn that. They must have turned over a new leaf.

Tomatoes tweeting are another matter, though…

Tomatoes tweeting would be like, totally killer