Trucker bombs. The shoulders of most rural highways are littered with these. Not saying that you toss 'em out the car somebody does. Otherwise, there is some strange phenomenon along our highways in which half-full bottles of various flavors of Gatorade are tossed out and they all degrade into some kind of pee-colored liquid.
I actually thought this through right before Christmas. I wanted to drive the nine hours to my Dad’s place, and do it at night so the Celtling would sleep through the car seat torture. Trouble is, I’m a tiny bladder type, and the idea of waking her up every couple of hours to go into a rest stop was too horrible to contemplate.
I finally decided to just try to drink as little as possible, and wake her if I had to. In the end the point was moot; we turned around after only an hour because Celtling got really sick.
Now I’m thinking these restop things are a great solution. Combine them my emergency plan (to wear a rain poncho on the side of the road,) and indecent exposure is also unecessary.
No comment on the various, um, alternative disposal methods (except that the thread has been quite educational!) but one way to reduce the need to stop - or the demand on the Gatorade-bottle stash - is to have a bagful of crunchy, salty stuff at hand. Pretzels work well for this.
The act of reaching for, extracting and munching on the pretzel helps with alertness.
The salt… well, you won’t need to pee as often during the drive. Of course you may have health issues that make this inadvisable, and anyway sooner or later it’ll, er, come out in the wash. But that won’t be until after you’re at your destination.
Damn, I didn’t realize the ticket was so big. I’m going to be much more careful during my piss-breaks. The again that is also why I do my drive at night it’s much harder to get caught.
David Sedaris wrote an essay that touched on his experience with the Stadium Pal. Spoiler alert: it wasn’t a good one. You can find videos of him reading it online.
Since I have an innie, I have no dog in this fight as it were, but the bolded part made me snort out loud at work. Damn it, I had to make up some lie about seeing a funny lolcat picture!
So you’d rather pee into an adult diaper than stop at a rest stop or fast food place? It doesn’t have to take that long.
Now I’ll be driving down the Internet picturing other people peeing into Gatorade bottles.
I don’t think adult diapers are designed to be used and then sat in. I think they’re more for the “Ooops!” factor, and meant to be changed immediately afterwards.
That being said, I don’t think there’s a drive long enough to make me consider pissing in my pants intentionally. I’d rather piss on the floor mat and throw it away than piss myself.
Hey, Rule 34
I drove 12 hours up I-95 from Florida to Virginia in one day, it really wasn’t a big deal. I had planned to drive about 8 hours and then spend the night in North Carolina, but with an iPod full of music I really wasn’t tired by nightfall. I stopped about 4 times, including 30 min or so for lunch.
Oooh, salty snacks is a good idea. I’m gonna have to stop at least once for gas. And I’m likely gonna have to pee at least once on either side of that gas stop. There is a bit of an experience thing that is driving this issue. Last time I drove through Chicago, I was probably 1/2 north of the city when I started thinking I needed to pee. I didn’t find a stop and I missed the turn off to the Oasis. It ended up taking me 2 1/2 hours to get through Chicago and finally find a place to pull off and relieve myself. I really don’t want to go into that situation again - unprepared.
If I gotta stop and it’s convenient, I will. If I’m in a huge city where I don’t know if that exit is going to take me to a new toll road and whether I can get back going the direction I need to, I’d rather not stop . Peeing on the shoulder of the SkyWay tollroad is likely inadvisable.
Shark Sandwhich, don’t underestimate the technology of modern adult diapers.
Litoris, I had the exact same reaction to a post in the “dumb things you’ve done” thread today. I was laughing at the guy who unbuttoned his shirt to pee, but I had to make something up about a webcomic.
It’s not shame about talking about so much just doing it, I think. I think it’s uncouth, but hey, to each his own.
(Besides, wouldn’t this be thread-PISSING)
d&r 
You may find that we girls are more squicked out at the idea of peeing our pants than you boys. We’re used to potty stops.
Mama Zappa has the best advice so far.
You can stay hydrated without the need to pee as often if you’re drinking a hyper or isotonic solution. Water is the worst… a healthy hydrated person will start filtering dilute urine about 10minutes after consuming straight water. And of course caffeine will act as a diuretic as well (although it has the side benefit of enhancing alertness for the drive). Your best bet is probably going to be non-caffeinated soda or gatorade as far as decreasing your urine output in the short term. Eventually, of course you’ll have to pee all that salt and fluid out, but it won’t be as quickly.
In my younger days, I had the same thought: all those pee breaks add up over a long trip. Deep vein thrombosises be damned, I wanted to drive for fourteen hours without stopping.
And my mind ran along the same lines: peeing into a container is distracting and unsafe. Naturally I turned to adult diapers and a case of Mountain Dew.
After two hours I started to get that feeling when one would normally look for a rest stop. Ha! No need: I’m making great time and I’m wearing a diaper. Nature can take its course.
An hour later I’d started to feel desperate and started to have second thoughts. “Is absorbent technology really that good? Are these things rated for eight cans of Mountain Dew? Am I sacrificing the resale value of the leather seats to save five minutes?” For the rest of the hour all I could think about was pee but wasn’t quite ready to pull the trigger.
Eventually it became clear that the trigger would have to be pulled, and quickly, lest my innards rupture. Ok, one two three go. Uh, go. Brain to bladder: it’s okay! It’s not the standard urination situation, but I’m giving you a one time pass.
Nothing.
I’ve never had to pee so badly but been unable to. At this point I should have just pulled over and found a tree or post or a moderately tall dandelion but I felt I had to prove myself that this wasn’t a lousy idea. However, thirty years of socialization conspired against me peeing my pants. It took another forty five minutes of pain and thinking about the Mighty Mississippi river before any actual micturition occurred. And river metaphors aside, there was physical pain - the constant ache of holding things back. It was literally all I could think about for two solid hours.
I had the answers to my earlier questions: adult diapers really can hold a ridiculous amount of fluid. My leather seats were safe. Proper human socialization re-asserted itself after this experiment. And adult diapers are totally not worth it. Sure, it might save time for the occasional astronaut or fetish model - someone who’s had practice getting over the taboo of pissing one’s pants. For the average road tripper, rest stops, fill ups or the aforementioned freeway on ramp are the way to go.
It’s in the case because it’s more prone to theft.
If you have time before your trip, you can start to train your bladder to hold larger volumes. It takes 2-3 weeks for training tobe effective, IME.
Urine backing up into the ureters can cause renal scaring. FYI.
Needing to piss is nature’s way of letting you stretch your legs on a long drive. Get out, enjoy the scenery, buy a snack, and consider it an experience in sight seeing America’s great bathrooms. Adult diapers are for the incontinent, and people who are into that sort of thing. You do not, repeat, do NOT want to be sitting in your own pee for hours on end. For one thing, when you arive at your destination, you’ll smell like the men’s room at Yankee stadium. Take it from someone who’s changed more than a few adult diapers in her time.
I’m still sort of wondering if you’re actually serious, or if I’m being whooshed.
The latter.
What about a tube extending from your penis out the window, would that work?