A few weeks ago, I told a friend of mine that if I were a red shirt, I would tell Kirk: “Y,know, Captain, over the last 40 episodes we red shirts have died from phasers, from having all the salt drained from our body, from being shifted to other dimensions, from poison darts, from giant spears, from being turned into polyhedrons and crumbled. I don’t care about the Prime Directive, I don’t care about Star Fleet Command, I don’t care about your orders. If the next ET I see so much as twitches a tentacle, I’m blowing it to hell.”
I get what you’re saying Terentii…but if everyone is saying something is racist (shrug).
I see a planet of mono-skinned aliens who dress kinda …Arabic?? and have this weird ‘dude from the 7-Up commercials accent’. Whose leader is very intrigued by a different looking alien woman. How many years have to pass before my interp overweighs historical precedent?? And its no longer racist?
BUT…i don’t care to fight on that hill. The “SJW writers” (Ok, well-meaning liberal writers) pissed me off with their ridiculous “Indian episode” a few years down the line. Thats the one I devote my energy to ranting about.
“When Diplomacy Fails.” Alt-title: “The Steel Fist Inside The Silk Glove.”
Picard & Co. are trying to mediate a dispute, but failing miserably; the situation erupts into all-out war between the factions.
In comes the not-so-nice Starfleet types, in a Defiant-type “gunship.” They’re all coldly rational military types, inflicting maximum carnage in minimal time, so much so the warring factions shit themselves and meekly come back to Picard, who smiles nicely, and says, “Now then; shall we resume negotiations?”
I had an idea once for a TNG episode where Worf and Riker are transmitted back in time to an early confrontation between the Klingons and the Federation. They have to protect each other and try not to interfere with the events. B story is the Ent D searching for them.
Oh, and another story that’s floated around for a while but never saw print was a what-if where the Botany Bay drifted in space for another century and is found by the Enterprise D.
theres a pc game called “redshirts” where your in a faux st:tos universe and your goal is to survive as long as possible under a faux kirk… its sort of short but its random every time you start a game …
The Enterprise becomes female-sentient and realizes Kirk has professed his “love” for her many times. Then she realizes Kirk is a major horn-dog and becomes jealous and proceeds to ruin his life and career, keeping the entire rest of the crew in the dark. Kirk tumbles to the ruse and begs for help, but just looks totes insane, which hastens his ruin. I don’t care how it ends.
There are so many episodes where something happened at the ending and you are left to wonder how it turned out but never know.
I’d LOVE a series in the Trek universe where they open with a synopsis of the past episode and then have a whole episode where we find out what happened next or how things turned out.
There’d be no set cast since each episode would be standalone as different ships and crews revealed what was happening in various places in the galaxy.
A Next Generation episode where the Enterprise is chosen to evaluate new uniforms for all of Star Fleet.
There would be countless costume changes, some homage to various sci-fi films and shows, some just to show off fantastic hats and shoes. Riker doesn’t want to give up a man purse and Picard starts going overboard with optional military bling. The Hello Dolly! style gets a strong mixed reaction.
They become fed-up with all the distraction when Data offers a logical solution.
In the final scene the team of designers are shocked to enter the bridge to find everyone naked, as per the sci-fi convention that in a perfectly climate controlled environment where no one does work that causes chafing or even has to carry a pot of hot soup, clothes are unnecessary (although it’s really to keep juvenile pervs interested.)
Just as Picard finishes giving a speech about how they have advance adult attitudes about the human body and refuse to be constrained by conformist uniforms, the turbo lift opens and a naked Worf steps out. Everyone takes a quick look and agree there is no way in hell they are going all day looking at that. So, they decide to go with the one that looks like the old uniform except with a decent collar and Geordi is glad that in this one instance being blind has worked in his favour.
After much running around and shouting (and Riker getting sexually molested), the planet decided that they weren’t politically ready for contact with the Federation, but please come back in a generation or two.
The episode “First Contact” was about postponing First Contact, i.e. the planet wasn’t ready to join the galactic community. I’m talking about a planet that’s ready to go out there into space, but wants to consider all the options. Maybe they have a reason to join the Ferengi or Tholians or Klingons.