If Chekov & Wesley Crusher are fighting over ForPrefect, I don’t wanna know about it. :eek:
Ripped-Shirt Kirk is one of the most powerful forces in the universe, second only to Mr. T and Ash (from Evil Dead). Of COURSE he’d mop up the floor with Picard.
Sisko, however, managed to cold-clock an omnipotent being, so as long as Kirk’s shirt remains unripped, he and Sisko are on equal footing.
I am amazed that no one has mentioned the master of Star Trek combat…
The Gorn!
Scotty beats La Forge by falling on him. Either that or he just holds out his fist and waits for La Forge to get pulled into Scott’s personal gravity well.
Try this:
Gul Dukat and Gul Macet vs Romulan Commander Tebok and Frederick La Rouque in a tag-team, with Bader N’D’D as Ref.
Kirk, shirt intact (I think) gave Trelaine a solid smack, so no advantage to Sisko.
Jadzia Dax vs. Ezri Dax - one has reach, but the other has spunk, and they both know all the same tricks, so it’d be anybody’s fight.
Scotty vs… I think his name was O’Reilly? The Irish dude who was Kirk’s classmate at the academy, who popped up on the Alice-in-Wonderland planet. Advantage Scotty, better drinker.
Gul Dumar always wanted to get a piece of Gul Dukat. The hate factor would make this a world-class smack-down.
Kai Opaka could bitch-slap Kai Winn into the next life.
I can see Sisko throwing punches at Odo, and Odo shooshing his body in big loops to avoid the blows, his head staying stationary and mocking the Captain.
You know Trip wants to deck Malcolm, but Malcolm would lay him low if he tried anything.
Wesley vs. the little sawed-off guy played by Clint Howard in that TOS episode…The Corbomite Maneuver?.. Wesley would still lose, the dickweed.
And I’d pay real money to see the Kirk/Ash match-up that SPOOFE suggests (who want’s a little?).
Okay, I’m done…Timmy
Some alien obviously took over my brain–I know* Miles isn’t Scottish, I do, really. Please don’t make me turn in my Star Trek Decoder Ring (The Official Insignia of Geekdom–not sold in stores), I was tired, I was trying to hard, I was mixing him up the Miles O’Keefe–no, Greystroke was English, you’re just making it worse. Um, ah, ah . . . Oh, oh!!! Q made me do it, yeah, that’s the ticket, Q took over my brain and made me write that Miles was a Scot. It wasn’t me, it was Q.
Do I still get to wear my Vulcan ears? Please?
Q also made me not preview . . .
Let’s see Neelix vs. Dr. Phlox - goofy alien showdown!
More? How about Bashir vs. Malcolm?
My money’s on Bashir, being genetically enhanced and all, but he doesn’t seem willing to use it that much.
This thread is way too funny. I better stop reading before I have a warp core breach.
(several stardates later)
How about Q vs Nagilam? Nagilam’s powers do appear more limited, but he’s also far more malicious than Q ever was.
Dr. Crusher vs Dr. Pulaski. Nah, that’s be boring, they’d probably get into a shouting match at most.
One of Lore’s psycho, ultraviolent Borg vs a Hirogin hunter. Drop them on an empty planet and get the hell out of the way.
Just means that Intact-Shirt Kirk and Sisko are on even footing, so it should be a good fight.
When in doubt, bet on the tough-ass brothah who rants about the lack of flying cars.
Kirk-vs- the Borg Collective - Kirk comes out on top, they can’t overtake his brain, he kills them all, blows up their planet-ship and he has sex with a borgette (make that 2 at one time) before it’s all done.
Jordy overheard in a bar brawl: “Hey, you wouldn’t hit a guy with glasses?!”
–p.
ps. I’d pay money to see Kirk step off the elevator and smack Riker and Picard’s heads together like the Three Stooges. I don’t know why. And, then, walk off with that quirky, cocky Jim-grin on his face. Also, I wish someone - ANYONE - would kick the crap out of Beverly “the bore” Crusher!
Picard’s now-dead brother vs. Jacques Chirac. - I just have to know.
Wesley vs. Spot.
Scotty vs. Zephram Cochrane - here’s your drunken techie brawl!
Red Shirt vs. The Common Cold
Barkley vs. The entire Dominion - the power of pure entropy has Barkley winning hands-down.
“Geordi, I cannot allow you to stun my cat.”
I’ve got this mental image now of Wesley with a shredded, bloody mess of ribbons of flesh, in place of a face. It’s a definite improvement. Thanks, Gorgon Heap!
I’d like to see
Tovak(sp?) vs. Spock
now that would be interesting. . .Captain Archer would lose against anyone he went up against, he’s a . . . well he’s just stupid and wimpy. But that’s my opinion.
oh and Scotty vs. O’Brian wouldn’t be bad to watch either. . .
What was the name of the Cardassian tailor in DS9, you know, the one who had apparently been drummed out of the Obsidian Order? Anyway, I always thought that guy would be amazingly good in a fight to the death…I picture him fighting dirty, pulling out concealed weapons, stuff like that.
You could tell he loathed Gul Dukat, and could probably hand him his head, if he wanted to. I would bet on him over any other DS9 character, except Odo.
Garrick.
Y’know, it only just now occured to me that a tailor would have a tremendous advantage, in the context of concealed weapons.