Fantasy Fights; part deux

Imagine your favorite characters from the movies, tv, comic books, video games, etc. and match them up against each other.

Muhammed Ali vs Rocky
Buffy vs Blade
Osama bin Laden vs Rambo
The Borg vs The Dominion
Dirty Harry vs Shaft
Bad, Bad Leroy Brown vs Stagger Lee
Cylon vs Terminator
PumkinHead vs Predator
Colonial Viper vs X-wing
Gandalf vs Harry Potter
T-1000 vs Agent Smith (The Matrix)
Batman vs Boba Fett
Red Dwarf’s Rimmer vs Voyager’s EMH Doctor

Come up with your own match-ups, or comment on an existing fight.

Say like, what factors go into a battle between Founders, Vorta, Jem’Hadar, and the Drones with the Borg Queen?

Say what? I’ve got to watch that show.

My favorite battle of cartoon characters would be:

Falwell vs. Farrakan

Lets set up some matches…

On a typical day in the city, two cybernetic hunters lope after their respective targets.

One, apparently a cop, is pursuing the young John Connor.
But you see, constant pursuit takes a lot out of a mimetic polyalloy, so on the run he recharges with his favorite amorphous fuel…peanut butter.

Meanwhile…

Agent Smith has targeted Neo and angles to intercept. He feels a little tired and hungry himself, so he nibbles on a chocolate bar.

Reaching a blind corner, Neo and Connor run past each other without incident, but their respective pursuers…

CRASH!!!

With the two computer controlled hunters on their respective asses, they notice the peanut butter jar with a chocolate bar stuck in it.

“Hey! You got peanut butter on my chocolate!”
“NO…You got chocolate in my peanut butter!”

Enraged with each other, they pull their guns out and start shooting.

T-1000 harmlessly absorbs the fusilade, while Agent Smith simply dodges all the incoming bullets.

Throwing away the useles, empty pistols, the two rush each other to engage in hand to hand combat…

WHO’S THE ULTIMATE WINNER?
LEAVE YOUR COMMENTS AND YOU DECIDE!

Well, if they’re in the matrix, couldn’t Agent Smith just possess the T-1000?

APB APB
FBI’s Ten Most Wanted: re. Doctor Kimble

Doctor Kimble has been seen fleeing authorities through
the New Jersey Pine Barrens. May be armed and should be considered dangerous. Wanted for the murder of his wife.

Deep in the abandoned ruins of a camp ground, the decayed
remains of a man in a hockey goalie mask rouses at the sound of feet running by. NOBODY trespasses upon Crystal Lake without incurring the bloody wrath of Jason Voorhees…


SPATIAL DISPLACEMENT COMPLETE
>PRIORITY ONE=TERMINATE SARA CONNOR
>PRIORITY TWO=TERMINATE WEAPONS CONTACT DOCTOR KIMBLE
>PRIORITY THREE=AQUIRE SUITABLE WEAPONRY, TRANSPORTATION, AND CLOTHING
>SCAN AREA…RESOURCE FOUND

The naked cyborg strolls up to a group of Hells Angels…

In an abandoned apartment building in Atlantic City, a lone figure rips the FBI Wanted Brief from the Telex. His cold hatred rises at the thought of this perpetrator on the run after escaping from justice. He takes his black body sock and fills the holsters with the tools of the trade… UZIs,
Colts, Magnums, extra clips, etc. He steps out into the night, the image of a skull on his chest…

Another lone figure views the same Brief, and is intriegued
by the back story…that of a one-armed man. Dr. Kimble is said to be on his own mission to find this man and bring HIM to justice to clear his name. Pulling the cowl over his head, the Dark Night mounts his car and blasts out of the BatCave…

High in orbit, the pilot of SLAVE 1 intercepts the news reports of a fugitive. Hey, a bounty is a bounty. Wonder how Dollars convert into Galactic Credits…

Farther out, another spaceship intercepts the same broadcast and concludes this individual human to be exceptional prey. Another trophy to add to his wall. He
attaches his shoulder blaster and sharpens his wrist blades…

THE FUGITIVE VS
JASON VS
THE TERMINATOR VS
THE PUNISHER VS
BATMAN VS
BOBA FETT VS
PREDATOR

WHO WINS? YOU DECIDE!

Hi all -

Been lurking in these forums for a while, but i found this and had to give out this website that i have been a fan of for quite some time. They post new scenarios every week.

http://www.grudge-match.com

Yep…
The World Wide Web Federation’s Grudge Match,
Comic Book Ultimate Battles (Both Dragon Hamster ltd.)
and The Crossover Universe.

Websites which deal with this very genre.

BTW, Master Brewer,
WELCOME TO THE STRAIGHT DOPE MESSAGE BOARDS!

Ghandi vs Mother Theresa
IN A STEEL CAGE GRUDGE MATCH!

ONLY ON PAY-PER-VIEW!!!

“There’s a bloody hunter on my animal sanctuary!”, bellows
Paul McCartney, eyeing the cute little deer, lying dead on the ground with an arrow stuck in its heart.

Running back to his house, he unlocks the secret compartment
which contains his old Beatles Nehru jacket, Sgt Peppers
Jacket, stash of sensemillion, and finds the UZI he bought years ago to ventilate Michael Jackson. His deer will be avenged.

Meanwhile…

Ted Nugent notches another arrow into his bow, ready to eliminate anyone foolish enough to stand in the way of his trophy.

What’s this? An old graying hippy is gunning after him?
Yeah, right! Bring it on!!

Paul McCartney vs Ted Nugent…WHO WINS? YOU DECIDE!

What about

Snake Plissken vs. Harry Tasker (True Lies)?
(“I tot you weer dead!” “Yeah, I get that a lot.”)

Maverick and Goose (Top Gun) vs. Luke Skywalker and Wedge?

Darth Maul vs. The Toad (X-Men?) (Played by the same dude)

Neo vs. the Keanu guy from Speed? Same dude again.

Ethan Edwards vs. Rooster Cogburn?

Any John Wayne character vs. The Man With No Name?

Shaft vs. Jules from Pulp Fiction?

Michael Jackson vs. Prince?

Han Solo (pre-special release) vs. Indiana Jones?

Chewbacca vs. Harry from Harry and the Hendersons?

Khan vs. Osama bin Laden?

Enterprise vs. Star DestroyerNO, FORGET I EVER SAID THAT

How about: Enterprise vs. Protector II (Galaxy Quest)

Or: Enterprise vs. Battlestar Galactica?

Mighty Ducks vs. Bad News Bears?

Garfield vs. Heathcliff?

Snoopy vs. Odie?

Calvin vs. Dennis the Menace?

Billy vs. Jeffy?

UncleJohn vs. Jack Dean Tyler?

Lorena Bobbitt vs Bill Clinton

Robert Blake vs OJ Simpson

Gary Condit vs Patsy Ramsey

Dean vs Brando

Lenny Briscoe (Law&Order) vs Sipowicz (NYPDBlue)
Freddy Kruger vs Pinhead
Rosemary’s Baby vs Damien(The Omen)
Reagan O’Niell(The Exorcist) vs Carrie
Buck Rogers vs Flash Gordon
Battlestar Galactica vs Imperial Star Destroyer

And the baddest all-time mother match-up…

JOHN McCLANE (DIE HARD) VS THE DEATH STAR!

Check it out on WWWF Grudge Match

Alien & Predator vs the Olsen Twins
Superman vs Urkel
Granny Clampett vs Fred Sanford
David Bowie vs Mick Jagger (hey, wait a minute…)
Incredible Hulk vs Alex P. Keaton
Rush Limbaugh vs Iron Man
Shaggy vs G. Gordon Liddy
Bob Dole vs Dolemite
ABBA vs Ace of Base

On the Undercard of Buffy vs. Blade:

Angelus vs. Frost

Gandalf vs. Dumbledore

Now were talkin’!

Michael is taking his mistress Alex for dirty sex in an out-of-the-way motel:

The Bates Motel.

From the picturesque house on the hill, an immobile figure gazes out the window and notices the shilloette of two adulterers through the motel’s blinds.

“Norman! Those two are commiting acts of FILTH in our motel!
Get…rid…of them.”

“But mother, they’re the only gests we’ve had in the past
five years! We need…”

“DON’T SASS ME, BOY! KILL THEM!!!”

Meanwhile…

“Michael, I’m carrying our child! I will NOT be IGNORED!”
“Alex, take a 'lude. I’m going out for a keg-run.”

As Alex stews in fury, she runs to the shower, where she hid a butcher knife. A figure in a granny outfit slides up behind her, brandishing a knife of his own…

PSYCHO VS FATAL ATTRACTION…YOU DECIDE THE WINNER!

I’d of paid good money to see Blazing Saddle’s Taggert (Slim Pickens) in a log rolling contest with Gunsmoke’s Festus.

Can you imagine the authentic frontier gibberish they’d sling?

Easy Rider Rednecks vs Deliverance Rednecks
Cujo vs a disgrunteled postal worker
Superman and Captain Marvel vs Darth Vader and Emperor Palpatine
Cennobites vs the Borg
Grand Admiral Thrawn vs Desslok (Star Blazers)
Ultraman Vs Godzilla
Sarah Connor mud wrestling Ellen Ripley
Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers vs Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Rambo vs the Terminator
Magneto vs the Energiser Bunny
Ho Chi Minh vs Che Gueverra
the Corleones vs the Sopranos
The Shadows (Babylon 5) vs Species 8472 (ST Voyager)
the Ghost Busters vs the MIB
Jeffery Dahmer vs Hannibal Lehcter
Houdini vs Alcatraz
The Living Dead vs The Blob
The Bionic Woman vs 7 of 9
t-1000 vs Odo
Ken and Ryu vs Jet Li and Chow Yun Fat

Jet Li vs The Jets (80’s band)
Hugh Borg vs Bjorn Borg
Bjorn Borg vs Bjorn Ulvaeus (of ABBA)
Popeye vs Tom Cruise
Popeye’s Brutus vs Caeser’s Brutus
Jim Morrison vs Jim on “Taxi”
Tom & Jerry vs Itchy & Scratchy
Spider-man vs Spider Jerusulam (“Transmetropolitan”)
Gene Hackman vs ANYBODY :smiley:
Jesus vs Santa Claus (ooops…been done)
Hitler vs Moe Howard AS Hitler
David Lee Roth vs Sammy Hagar
KISS vs Bread
Ah-nold vs Jean-Claude van Damme
Leona Helmsley vs Charles Bronson
Dirty Harry vs The Pepsi Girl (I would PAY to see this)
Rosie O’Donnell vs a 400lb rabid gorilla
Capt. Picard vs Richard Simmons
Spock vs Dr. Spock
ELO vs ELO Part II (Bev Bevan MUST DIE!)
Charlie Brown & Snoopy vs Calvin & Hobbes
Spider Jerusulam (“Transmetropolitan”) vs Uncle Duke
Olive Oyl vs Big Ethel
Wolverine vs Shirley Temple
The Little Rascals vs the Bowery Boys
Worf vs Bugs Bunny
Daffy Duck vs Donald Duck (NO contest)
The Joker vs Hannibal Lechter
Jim Carrey vs a 5000lb block of granite dropped from space
Mariah Carey vs a 100,000,000lb block of granite dropped from Jupiter
Pink Panther vs Elmer Fudd
The Six Million Dollar Man vs Data

Daryl Strawberry vs Robert Downy Jr.
Crockett & Tubbs vs Cheech & Chong
BLEEP-BLEEP
“Come.”
“Captain, I understand you want me to pilot some new vessels. They’re…one-man fighter craft?”
“Indeed, Number One. You, DS9’s Col. Kira, and Voyager’s
Lt. Paris will be field testing fighter craft for use against the Dominion. Three examples are on loan from their respective governments. The Craft with the best
operational envelope will secure the contract.”
“What are the fighters called?”
Pressing a button his desk, three holographic images floated at eye-level, rotating to provide a 360 degree view.
“The Finalists are the Colonial Viper, The Republic X-Wing
and the Earth-Force Star-fury.”

WHICH IS THE BEST STARFIGHTER?