I was only mildly chuckling on this thread until I read this one, then I about fell out of my chair!!! Hilarious!
Tammy Fae Baker vs 10 lbs of Nads
Darva Conger vs Rick Rockwell’s Mom
Joan Collins vs Anita Bryant
Jimmy Johnson vs Jerry Jones (to the death)
Jean Claude van Damme vs a script
Neil Young vs Lynard Skynard
McGuyver vs Home Depot
Uranus vs the Hubble Telescope
Chef vs Nick Nolte
Richard Gere vs Mighty Mouse
Mr. Blue Sky asks: Gene Hackman vs. anybody
This has actually been settled recently: http://abcnews.go.com/sections/entertainment/DailyNews/hackman013001.html
The man can take a shot to the nads and not even feel it.
Wow!
Wayto gonads!
Judge Ito vs Pat Morita
Clara Peller vs all-you-can-eat @ the Hungry Heifer
Whopee Goldburg vs Mary Steenburgen
Burgess Meredith vs George Burns
Edith Bunker vs Marie Romano
Pat Boone vs Dennis Rodman
Cecil vs Howard Stern
the Marx Bros. vs the Three Stooges
Basil Fawlty vs Mr. Bean
Lucy and Ricky vs The Honeymooners
Alice Cooper vs Ozzy Osbourne
Stevie Wonder vs Ray Charles
Babylon 5’s Whitestar vs DS9’s Defiant
Millenium Falcon vs Delta Flyer
Pauly Shore vs. Carrot Top
The bugs from “Starship Troopers” vs. the giant ants from “Them”
Dr. Dre & Snoop Dogg vs. Dr. Dre & Ed Lover
Mick Jagger vs. Steven Tyler
Fat Albert vs. Fat Bastard (Sumo?)
RoboCop vs. The Terminator
The Supremes vs. the Four Tops
Scooby Doo vs. Astro Jetson
Hanibal Lector vs. Garlent Green (Con Air)
Chris Farley vs. John Belushi
Mr. T vs. Allisa Milano in the 1-800-COLLECT Steel Cage of Death!!!
The Adams Family’s Lurch vs Tony Robbins
Diana Ross vs Michael Jackson
Daniel Snyder vs Jerry Mathers
Oprah Winfrey vs Playtex
Wham vs Van Cliburn
Delta Burke vs Liz Taylor
Shelly Winters vs Jonathan Winters
Shannen Doherty vs Adobe Photoshop
Mike Ditka vs Dick Butkis
Janet Reno vs Ms. Chokesondick
Eddie the Eagle vs Johnny Knoxville
The Kommundant was pacing back and forth in front of his prisoners. His horseman’s leather quip he snapped at the side of his bootleg repeatedly with a satisfyingly sinister crack. His crisp military uniform left no doubt of his status as a master interregator.
“Vee ave VAYS of making you TALK! You theenk you can remain
zilent for LONG? I DON’T THEENK ZO!”
He glared at his mute prey:
A bum with extremely pronated feet, a fuchia feline of indeterminate sexual oientation, and a potato-faced alien.
YOU DECIDE WHO’S THE FIRST TO CRACK!
Charlie Chaplain
The Pink Panther
Morn
Now that’s comedy!
The al-Qaida network vs Ditka
bin Laden vs a Tomahawk missile
The Undertaker vs. Bin Laden
Mankind vs. Bin Laden
Mr. T vs. Bin Laden
Andre the Giant vs. Bin Laden
Ray Lewis vs. Bin Laden
The Insane Voodoo Clown vs. Bin Laden
Jesus vs. Bin Laden
Muhammad Ali vs. Bin Laden
Shaq vs. Bin Laden
Weird Al Yankovic vs. Bin Laden
Every match would be a handicap match, with all of Bin Laden’s limbs strapped down. In each match, Bin Laden’s opponent would have access to a branding iron w/fire, aluminum baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire, several jars of acid, a vat of boiling tar, a whip w/glass shards, Clorox and Vanish, an assortment of knives and swords, salt, some maggot-infested raw pork, and a shotgun. Bin Laden’s opponent will be disqualified if he uses the shotgun before using all the other weapons. Double DQ if Bin Laden dies before all weapons can be used.
Justine Bateman vs. Tina Yothers RAWWWRRRR!!!
Bookman(Good Times) vs Re-Run(What’s Happenin’)
Cecil vs Ripley
Al Qaida vs John McClane (Die Hard)
Emperor Palpatine vs Darkseid
Torquemada vs McCarthy
In his band of fellow Fremen, the Muad’ib excuses himself to
meditate. Paul looks deep into the place where the Bene-
Gesserit are afraid to look…and what he sees puzzles him.
A galaxy at war. Soldiers in white armor, led by a demon in black…wielding a sword of fire.
Looking deeper, Paul Atreides finds himself drawn in…
literally!
Transported through space and time, the Muad’ib finds himself in the Galactic Empire.
Paul Atreides vs Darth Vader. You Decide the Winner.
Benji vs ToTo
Flipper vs Mark Spitz
David Spade vs Steve Buscemi
Alan Fundt vs Mel Brooks
Martha Stewart vs Aunt Jemimah
Howard Roark vs Andy Warhol
Atticus Finch vs Johnny Cochran
Jennifer Flowers vs Monica Lewinski