Yojimboguy, you’re on. You’re also our romantic male lead, along with Ino and Elenfair and pendgwen as our female leads.
The time: The dawn of the industrial revolution.
The place: The sleepy, agricultural village of Cecily.
The villain: Agentfroot, representative for Outrageous Gadgets (OG) who has a brilliant plan to “improve” life in the village.
Take it away maestro!
CJ
Waitasec.
‘young leading man’ … yet I’m cast as a female lead?
It’s your vision, sir, but I respectfully request a re-casting as a male character, preferably opposite Elenfair. Not for me, you see, but because she seems a little insistent that I have such a role.
I’ll handle the lighting.
cj: Before Lno can say, it’s L N O, not I N O:)
And he’s male.
I’m auditioning for Og.
Excuse me – I’m a victim of my own bad phrasing. Lno is a male romantic lead, so we’ve got 2 couples plus other assorted interests. Oh, and I’m female. All right! We’ve got a classical Shakespeare plotline – a couple of cases of confused gender!
[tenor and boy disguise]My mistress has sent me with a message for you.[/tenor and boy disguise]
CJ
Make that young man, please. :sigh: My morning cup of tea should kick in in a minute.
CJ
I am a dramatic mezzo-soprano. We are always the jealous rival/ evil influence/ heavy, and never get the guy.
(Story of my life. So I’d be typecast; wouldn’t be the first time.)
hmmm, now to find a good villain costume… maybe a bright pink power suit… wait, no, i’d never wear that…
i can fake-opera-sing, but it sounds terrible.
I will be the giant statue of Il Commendatore that sends venal wrongdoers to hell.
Chi l’anima mi lacera?
Chi m’agita le viscere?
Che strazio, ohimé, che smania!
Che inferno, che terror!
I can stand at the side and do the sign language interpreting. It’ll be very dramatic sign language interpreting, I promise.
I’ll be the comic relief cook/servant who bakes the twenty-four blackbirds in a pie…
Oooh, can I be a duchess, and stare haughtily through a lorgnette? I always wanted to do that.
Unfortunately, I am a contralto…I don’t think we’re allowed to be anything more than chorus members. Guess that typecasts me as one of the Teeming Millions.
Can I get at least one smartass driveby remark? I’m a girl, so you can’t cast me as handy…
I want the part of Sir Edward of Zottiland.
Please?
I’m too shy to be on stage.
What? Quit lauhing!
I’ll make the costumes… I’ve got lots of experience with gawdy garments. Just ask my mother-in-law.
Here is the refrain the chorus shoud sing troughout the show:
Oh Cecily, oh Cecily!
No one shalt mess with Thee!
Our village square,
Our maidens fair,
Our menfolk brave and free.
::: peers from her balcony at lno, hiding in the shade below :::
Ah! tu sais que la nuit te cache mon visage!
Tu le sais! si tes yeux en voyaient la rougeur!
Elle te rendrait témoignage
De la pureté de mon cœur!
…
LNO, STOP CHUCKLING, DAMNIT!
(for the curious, that’s Gounod, Roméo et Juliette)
E.
:: snicker :: Devant Dieu qui m’entend … bwahahaha … je t’engage ma foi!
No, no, Elly, I’m not laughing AT you! Wait, I can do this, let me try it again.
Devant Dieu qui m’en…
No, I’m laughing too much. One sec. I need a danish. Where the hell’s that danish boy?
Oh Coldfire, you’re needed on the set!
(Pssst, cjhoworth, Coldfire is Dutch, not Danish.)