Life.
“I hope life isn’t a big joke, because I don’t get it,” Jack Handy
Point taken. Still, my rule of thumb is if the game has more rules than baseball, it’s too much work for a game. For me, at least. If I’m gonna relax with a game, I want it easy - I’d rather spend my mental energies (what’s left of 'em, anyway) on productive things 
drewbert, going back to blowing up aliens now. (yes, I know some of you don’t get it! 
)
Bryant Gumble. He was off the air for months and there was no massive outcry at his departure. Who thought it would be a good idea to give him another job? Although I guess he does a good job, no one lilkes him.
I’ll ditto:
[ul]
[li]Woody Allen movies[/li][li]Cell phones (if I were President, I’d ban them before guns!)[/li][li]Pokemon[/li][li]Rosie O’Donnell[/li][li]comb-overs (Do they really think they’re fooling anyone???)[/li]Tongue and other unnecessary body piercings
[/ul]
And I’ll add:
[ul]
[li]Grunge Rock[/li][li]High heels with blue jeans[/li][li]MORONS who forward me those STUPID urban legend emails because they really believe they’re true (like someone will really show up in your driveway with the keys to a new car just because you send me a damn email. Sheesh! When I laughed my ass off at a friend who sent me that one and dared to ask her just how in tarnation she thought they’d get her address, she actually replied, “well, you never know, so just in case…” What turnip truck did she fall off of???)[/li][li]The Simpsons & South Park[/li][li]People who vacation at the beach and lay by the pool.[/li][li]Drugs (even in “moderation”) and drinking to get drunk.[/li][/ul]
And the #1 thing I just don’t get, never have and never will…
[ul]
[li]Shopping How on earth can women spend all day in malls and stores? Especially just looking? Jeez Louise, I can’t think of a bigger waste of time, let alone one that’s more frustrating and annoying.[/li][/ul]
“How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.” - Anne Frank
To Gabriel: Didn’t you see the end? Jake and Elwood ram their car through a shopping mall, running people down and wrecking the place. Don’t tell ME that’s a “mission from God”!
dougie,
the point of contention was that they KILLED people . . . not mass destruction - I will admit there was some gratutious destruction, but hey its just a SNL flick ya know ?
“A single lifetime, even though entirely devoted to the sky, would not be enough for the investigation of so vast a subject.” - Seneca
Well, my vegetarianism has absolutely zilch to do with being healthy. It’s about the animals. And no I don’t wear leather.
Oh, and I used to drive standard, but when I had a kid I got an automatic. It is a lot easier to deal with the kid when I don’t have to worry about shifting too.
Things I don’t get:
meat eaters
beanie babies
those huge baggy pants
why people think Julia Roberts is attractive
why people think Hugh Grant is attractive
some other stuff I can’t think of right now.
–
“it’s all real”
“I KNEW IT!!!”
O p a l C a t
www.opalcat.com
- Cher
Dee da dee da dee dee do do / Dee ba ditty doh / Deedle dooby doo ba dee um bee ooby / Be doodle oodle doodle dee doh http://members.xoom.com/labradorian/
Okay, my list:
I don’t get…
…any movie/TV show about high school students who have “meaningful relationships”, and act like 35-year-olds (e.g., Dawson’s Creek). Hello??? Did any of these writers actually GO to high school?
…why people have such a problem with vegetarianism. I won’t bug you about your eating habits, and I hope you won’t bug me about mine.
…navel piercing. Ugh.
…tanning salons. WHY? It looks awful and completely fake (especially in February) and it’s BAD for you.
…ditto on Republicans. I try to be understanding, really, but why do they have to say all that stuff I don’t agree with?
…frames and animation. Stop it!
…the appeal of Top 40 music. My friend listens to it, and going places with her can be torture. (“Have you heard that new Celine Dion song? I love it! Let me play it for you!”)
~Harborina
“This is my sandbox. I’m not allowed to go in the deep end. That’s where I saw the leprechauns.”
Mr. Bean, I can not stand the sight of him.
Anything made out of yarn that is not at the very least 85% cotton, I can’t even touch them.
I think that boys cheese has slid right off his cracker!
-The Green Mile
Things I don’t get:
Jimmy Buffet
Coffee
Sushi
Tattoos
Renaissance Fairs
Maui (give me Kauai any day)
Basketball
Nightclubs
Brady Bunch Quote Of The Week:
“Judging from the reaction around here, I’d say Davy Jones is the hottest thing since pepperoni pizza.” - Carol
-
WWF and WCW - I know other people have mentioned it
-
Cigars - why do people smoke these things? I mean cigarettes are bad enough but god these stink!
-
When a “controversial” movie or book comes out and there is a big public outcry - don’t they realize this is all advertising and will create more sales? if they just ignored it many of these things would probably just go away?
-
Parents who don’t want condom machines in junio high/high school bathrooms - do they really think seeing these machines will inspire thier children to have sex?
-
Modern Dance - I’ve tried, just don’t get it
-
Bars that charge for water - bastards.
-
Vegetarian food that looks like meat - like veggie ground - what’s the point
-
The NHL - They complain about high player salaries and how they are having trouble affording them - so don’t - drop those “top” players down to the IHL and pick up on some rookies who would give their right arm to play the game. The top ones will come back when they realize that’s the way things are. I mean, how much money should one player make?
-Tattoos on women’s stomachs - if you are going to get one, get it somewhere that won’t alter in size a whole lot
-
Women I know that sleep with various men hours after meeting them and don’t understand why they are not in a relationship.
-
People who complain constantly about their weight - do something about it then!
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Gel nails - for goodness sake, who notices your nails anyway?
-
Jerry Springer
-
Jerry Springer’s guests - Why do these people seem so surprised when their SO brings them on this show with bad news? It’s Jerry Springer for goodness sake, do you really think it will be good news?
That’s it for now. This thing ended up longer than I thought. Sorry about that
People who drink, not to enjoy the buzz, but solely to pass out or black out. Alcohol should be respected, or the person drinking it will get no respect.
Remember, I’m pulling for you; we’re all in this together.
—Red Green
Um… I think the point is so that people who don’t want to eat meat, but still LIKE meat can eat something they enjoy and still follow their beliefs (health, moral, whatever). Not a difficult concept to grasp.
–
“it’s all real”
“I KNEW IT!!!”
O p a l C a t
www.opalcat.com
How to write ‘long and deep’
“Consider it a challenge…”
Things others “get” but I don’t:
- golf; tried it, hated it, boring as hell
- shopping; my idea of misery is a mall
- opera; I’ve studied and listened and listened; I can understand it but not enjoy it.
- religion; any and all of them
- professional sports; personal and emotional involvement with corporations.
- microwave cooking; fine for popcorn, etc. but it’s so much easier and infinitely better done on a stove
- most Hollywood blockbusters; I used to love movies but anymore they leave me saying “huh?”
- fashion; so much of it is expensive and makes attractive people look like dorks
- people who don’t like animals; not saying they don’t have a right, just can’t understand it at all.
- aggressive driving; car as ego? all that dangerous maneuvering that proves…what?
- non-readers; I just can’t imagine life without reading; what do they replace it with?
- rap and thundering car speakers; if it shakes the pictures on my walls, what the hell does it sound like inside the car? Why not just hang around the airport and listen to jets accelerate?
Obviously befuddled by life,
Veb