All cops will go to interview the absolute worse serial rapists and killers all by themselves!
I know you better start talking straight with us, punk, or else they’re gonna just love your little white keister down at Rikers. What do you say, partner - think this punk would go for two cartons of cigarettes on the open market?
That someone is making revolvers that can actually shoot 10 to 12 times without reloading.
…*Special stenography division"… “whatever you say will go on on your permanent record”. A [del]plucky young [/del] hot female stenographer solves crimes with [del]his [/del]her transcribing skills.
Judge;“would you read back what was said”
Stenographer; “Witness; Yes, I killed him with an axe”
Witness; (so far cool as an antarctic cucumber gets enraged) “I didn’t say that, besides, I used a hammer not an axe!”
Stenographer; “Gotcha!”
Judge; “bailiff, place the witness under arrest”
…
Or she solves the case by reviewing statements as she files them, noticing that detail everyone missed.
Or she overhears a conversation, and using her shorthand skills records it for evidentiary purposes (which are admissible as she’s an officer of the court)
…
Gotta be worth an Emmy or two. 
All cops are excellent marksmen who never miss the bad guy, instead of the truth, which is that cops make Imperial Stormtroopers look like Annie Oakley.
Once a month? It happens every day in Liberty City — at least, the days I’m there.
If the bad guy/gal is acquitted incorrectly or the case is dismissed on a technicality, there is a better than 50-50 chance they will be shot by an outraged relative of one of their victims, on the courthouse steps, immediately after the verdict.
If a homeless man is found murdered in NY City, a team of at least 4 detectives, 2 prosecutors, and at least one forensic expert will work tirelessly while wearing designer clothes to solve the case. At no point will someone point out that they are actually too busy and burned out to give much of a rat’s ass about the case and why don’t we just call it a suicide?
Gangs are made up of vaguely ethnic people and pretty much dress like extras from the Thriller video.
Policewomen have amazing racks.
Despite the fact that police go through a rigorous background check before being hired, every cop has something horrible in their past.
Besides being just plain evil, rich people hate their spouses, siblings, parents, in-laws, everyone related to them except their kids. But their kids hate them. In fact, the rich kid probably did it, and will scream a confession at Mommy and Daddy in the prosecutor’s office.
During this outburst, Daddy will sit stunned with his mouth hanging open. Mommy will be glaring at Daddy because she hates him.
A guy can kill a couple of dozen people in broad daylight in front of scores of witnesses, but if he isn’t read his Miranda Rights, he gets off.
ALL medical personnel will balk at giving out patient info, citing doctor-patient confidentiality, even after being told the patient is dead.
Cops will accuse suspects of being killers the first time they meet, and the suspect will splutter and say something falsely incriminating instead of denying the accusation. When they finally get around to it, they’ll say “That’s impossible!” Who says that? Mathematicians and scientists maybe, but everyday people?
That’s not true. There’s always one witness whose testimony is a little off. During cross examination, he or she (usually she) will crack, make a complete witness stand confession, and explain in vivid detail the emotional reasons he or she is the actual guilty party. Somewhere nearby, but out of sight, a string bass section will be playing a soft but ominous single note with a fermata.
Well, yeah, that’s because daddy cheats on her with the maid and that’s why mommy drinks.
And the if the main character is FBI, the local cops are always gruff and stupid. If the main character is police, then the agents are aloof and will always pull rank.
A lawyer will ask to introduce evidence that is absaloutley not allowed ie. a statement beaten out of a witness after no Miranda and a threat to blackmail him if he doesn’t cooperate and the Judge will say “I’m going to allow this.”
British Cops tend to revert to baby talk when interrogating a hardened criminal.
"So it seems that Lennie has become the big boy in the playground and you’ll have to share your sweets with him if you don’t want your toys broken.
Is that right Lennie?"
If a witness/co-defendant changes their mind about testifying in the case, the ADA marches right up to them in the courthouse and threatens them with perjury or obstruction. This concerns no one, especially not their defense attorney, who shrugs his shoulders helplessly.
You’d be surprised at how many people the mentally retarded kill.
While a cop might suspect an innocent person, if the cop is pulled off a case by his* superior officer, his suspicion is always accurate.
(*I was going to say “his or her”, but it’s never her)
But always for good reason- usually to protect somebody else. Retarded people also all speak like small children who have speech impediments.
The guilty party is usually the most smug during the investigation. The wrongfully arrested innocent person is usually polite and earnest, just emotional. Rarely are innocent people obnoxious and rarely are the guilty capable of seeming innocent all the way through.
Cops remember every single statement from person they ever talked to and the smallest details of every case they ever worked on.