Opal, I believe bench is the word used by Aussies to refer to kitchen countertops. Rather like we Brits call them worktops.
** Typo ** You don’t have central heating in North Dakota??? I spent a few months in Fargo. Brrrrrr.
I’ve actually seen this hint in books: If drain cleaner doesn’t undo the clog, use a plunger. Yeah, right. Plung lye infested water. And hope there’s no backsplash.
Made a mistake, but run out of liquid paper? Use cottage cheese. (Also allows you to eat your words.)
Save time and money by washing yourself and your clothes at the same time, simply fill the bath up with detergent. If you’re small enough you can then dry them, and yourself by climbing inside the tumble-dryer - it also makes a comparable ride to some rollercoasters…
Another “you thought you were joking” one!
This is how I get rid of ants in the kitchen. Shrivels up the ants in milliseconds and doesn’t leave a poisonous residue. Other than the time I set the curtains on fire it’s great!
You know, a spray bottle of soapy water is a great way to deal with fruit flies. You don’t need to have lightning reflexes, and clean up is a snap!
I use WD-40 and a zippo, it does work, just have to have the hose ready. 
Just noting that I should not have read a lot of these posts while eating Ben and Jerrys Half Baked twisted chocolate brownie and cookie dough!:eek:
Should we try this on Coldfire?
If you don’t have time for a few days to take a bath or shower, just use extra cologne. No one will notice. To the French Dopers, um, never mind. You already know this one.
My teenage sons refer to it as ‘A Shower in a Can’.
Unfortunately, it IS noticeable. An adolescent that reeks of Lynx or Brut is only a marginal step up from smelly pits and feet.