It’s a good thing I detest cold water immersion, then. If I increased my libido any more I could hire myself out as a fire starter.
Basketball, must be basketball. Baseball doesn’t work.
“I’ll be in my bunk.”
Sounds like we have this problem well in hand.
Then he took a pull, then I took a pull, then he took a pull, and I took a long pull…
You do realize I’m talking about a bottle? 
I once knew a guy who always cried when he masturbated. A real tearjerker.
You mean start a pole?
Five minutes? Isn’t that a little bit “wham, bam, thank-you, hand?”
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This is from my father’s Boy Scout manual published in 1943.
Now that I look closely, those three question marks DO somewhat resemble windblown hairs.
Need a comb?
Yeah, it’s called “the sex fluid”. Rules your whole body. Don’t waste it. (OK, it’s hilarious now to read such made up drivel, but it did a lot of damage in the days…)
“A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual, and certainly without any choice. That’s the way your hard-core Commie works. I first became aware of it, Mandrake, during the physical act of love… Yes, a profound sense of fatigue, a feeling of emptiness followed. Luckily I — I was able to interpret these feelings correctly. Loss of essence. I can assure you it has not recurred, Mandrake. Women, er, women sense my power, and they seek the life essence. I do not avoid women, Mandrake…but I do deny them my essence.” – Base Commander Jack D. Ripper
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Heh, as soon as I glanced back at the thread, the “whoosh” sound that I heard when I posted suddenly made total sense to me.
I can see where a guy might get bound up a bit if he is making out and getting teased by a girl, otherwise the need just passes on its own until we have time to take care of it. I never have gotten the cold shower thing.
Sex fluid? Is that another name for alcohol?
“Seek advice from wise, clean, strong men.”
This sounds suspiciously like a personals ad in the Castro.
Cold shower vs. masturbate? Can’t I do both like the late Earl Warren?
There are no stupid masturbation questions-There are just embarrassing stains.
I guess a cold shower wont work for blue balls, but masturbation will? 
So, how are things standing?
Presumably they are in a situation where they would remain aroused, and the arousal is distracting them or otherwise impeding them.
And, yes, count me in on thinking a cold shower was a metaphor or euphemism.