Inspired by the following comment in this thread.
Originally posted by gigi:
Note: Solo showers only. Also, orgasm not required, but you have to have given it the old college try, effort-wise.
So, when I was younger I did this a few time. Here’s why I don’t any more :
It takes longer, and it doesn’t feel that much better to be worth it. The quick “rub one out to fall asleep” is a lot easier to do and takes like a minute if you load the correct media in your mental spank bank. I think part of the problem is the water increases friction and thus rawness.
Same problem with trying to have intercourse with a partner in the shower. I’ve tried that a few times, but normal showers, you have to do it standing up, and the shower spray washes away most lubrication, and you keep slipping out. The few times I tried I basically had to just pick up the woman and carry her to the bed or the bathroom floor first to get anywhere.
Just as shower sex doesn’t appeal to me, neither does shower masturbation. Li’l Dunnit ain’t too keen on doing his thing when he’s doused in water. I’ll stick to my computer chair and bed. 
Does it count if I do it in the shower stall (at home) without the water running? It’s just a clean place to spritz the old “milk of human kindness,” and I rinse it out afterward.
80% without the water running, 20% with.
:o Of all my comments to spawn a new thread!! :o
I’m a zero because masturbation is against my religion but given what was said about soap and ureters, it may have been a zero anyway! 
Call me a traditionalist, but I like to do it just like my ancestors: in front of a computer with lots of tissues.
I can’t, so zero.
I’ve done it on rare circumstantial occasion, but so infrequent that it is not going to show up on your pole radar.
If you’re getting soap in your ureters, you’re doing something horribly, horribly wrong!
I can’t imagine what living a life without beating off would be like. Would you get so much tension your balls explode?
Haven’t done that in years. I mean, alone.
The pressure tends to get relieved in involuntary ejaculations during sleep. “Wet dreams.”
Since that’s messy and disturbing, lots of guys prefer to “take matters into their own hands,” and release the fluid pressure under controlled circumstances. A little like doing a controlled burn in a forest. It’s better if it happens where and when you want it, rather than at some unexpected time and place.
Tubs just aren’t my thing; beds are warmer and more comfortable.
What religion is that?
Roman Catholicism.
Soap burns. Not at the moment, but 20 minutes later.
As mentioned above (or maybe in the other thread?) soap has never burned for me. It’s just nice and slippery.
You get water under the skin, painful and pointless
I rarely masturbate in the shower, and can’t actually remember the last time I did. It’s probably been years since I did.
I don’t think I have ever done it in the shower, and if I did, I don’t remember it. Doesn’t sound pleasant. Seems like I would remember something like that.
I am certain I have never done it in the bath tub. I hate baths. The last thing I’d want to add to that filth bouillabaisse are my own bodily fluids. Yech!