Stupid phrases that must die!

We all know what these sayings are supposed to mean, but their actual meaning leaves much to be desired:

The proof is in the pudding. Oh really? The proof of what? Fermat’s Last Theorem? The Grand Unification Theory? Or maybe the pudding is spiked with vodka? The correct phrase is, “The proof of the pudding is in the eating.” Learn it, use it.

You can’t have your cake and eat it too. Well what the hell am I supposed to do with my cake? If I wanted a centerpiece for my table, I’d get some flowers or make a sculpture out of AOL CDs or something. Cakes exist to be eaten, so go think up some other metaphor–oh, wait, there is one! “You can’t have it both ways.” Excellent!

I could care less. …but I don’t because it would actually take more effort on my part to care less than I do, effort which I would rather expend by searching for deep meanings hidden in dessert items.

Brownie points. If I collect several brownie points and glue them together, can I make a +9 Brownie Shuriken of Stupid Phrase Slaying?

I’m sure there are more, but I can’t think of them at the moment.

Irregardless, “I could care less” sure is dumb. Stick that in your ATM machine!

regardless… I couldn’t care less… ATM…

Uh, I usually hear “I could care less” as “I could care - less!” In other words, it’s sarcastic.

Like Judy Tenuta’s “That could happen!” and “You could pass for straight!”

I agree that this phrase is stupid. But this is really a bastardization of the real phrase which is “The proof of the pudding is in the tasting” which makes more sense.

:: Pulls up a deck chair ::

This is a corruption of ‘you can’t eat your cake and still have it’, which makes a little more sense.

“On your plate”. As in “What do you have on your plate for the next week?” or “Can I get you to clear your plate and take a swing at this?”

PEOPLE! We are working in an office! THERE IS NO PLATE! NO PLATE-HAVERS WE!

" Going forward…" Well, THAT"S refreshing. For a moment there I thought Mr. Peabody was in the closet with the WayBack machine. And, you know, we’d be going backward.

As Wikkit obliquely pointed out, this is a corruption of “I couldn’t care less” - i.e. “it would be impossible for me to give less of a shit”.

“I could care less” is simply illogical - it doesn’t even work as sarcasm. Unless the meaning is “I could care less… but I don’t”.

Regarding tautology, in Ireland, there is an organization called Allied Irish Bank. This is shortened to AIB. The bank buildings all have “AIB Bank” written on them. Their ATM (machines) are called “Banklinks”, which have written on them: AIB Bank Banklink.

In other words: Allied Irish Bank[sup]3[/sup] link.

Ahhh, Redundant Acronym Syndrome (properly known as RAS Syndrome), love it.

Personal Pet Peeve -

Some jackass, attempting to rationalize some piece of shit somethingorother, pipes up with “well, you know, ignorance is bliss”…

OK dumbass, the full phrase is “Where ignorance is bliss, 'tis folly to be wise.”

IiB is a qualifier, not a justification!

Jeez…don’t get your panties in a wad. :smiley:

Ending a sentence with “not”.

I’m going to peel the adam’s apple of the next person I hear say that juvie crap.

Yeah, right.

I believe you. Not.

Yeah, I went to the ATM machine at 8AM this morning, put in my PIN number, and got my cash money.

Boy, that steams me. I also have a friend that constantly misuses the phrase “begs the question”. He thinks it means “raises the question”. Urgh.

For some reason, I always thought it was “The proof is in the putting.”, i.e., the way you say something affects the perceived validity of the point you’re making. I guess I’d never seen it written down. Hm. I guess I’ve got another think coming. :smiley:

If you enjoy something a bit more pedantic, try this site. I found it humorous, if a bit erudite for the Pit. Calling Mrs. Malaprop!

Errr - sheepish look I guess I shouldn’t have tried squeezing into the size small BVD’s this morning - HEY! It was early and I hadn’t had my coffee!!!

A more recent phrase which irritates me to no end is when someone expresses agreement by saying “Right there with you, man.”

Don’t be that guy!


You’re not just rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic?

jjimm, you could also have mentioned the EBS Building Society.

The “BS” in “EBS” stands for … Building Society.

The one that always pisses me off is “curiosity killed the cat” No sh*t, but did you know “satisfaction brought him back”? I hate it when people drop half a quote in order to change the meaning entirely. If you don’t like curiosity make up your own quote ya goobs!