Reminds me how Winged Victory in the Astro City comics runs a bunch of self defense/self empowerment centers for women. I don’t know if she charges for them, however,
Charles Xavier, Amnesiologist
Painful experience? Traumatic event? Wish you could just forget about it? Now, you can.
Kurt Wagner AKA Nightcrawler AKA Herr Indigo
Certified German teacher. Certified fencing instructor (foil, epee, and saber). Certified dance teacher. Double jointed gymnast with prehensile toes and tail. Years of circus performing experience. Available for children’s parties.
Doctor Victor Von Doom, Tutor
I was born a poor Romany boy. Now, I am absolute ruler of Latveria. I did it with discipline and study. I can impart that same discipline and love of knowledge to your children. I guarantee that your children will improve. Doom does not fail!
Doctor Stephen Strange, MD Motivational Speaker
I was a brilliant surgeon. Wealth, women, fast cars, I had it all. Then, a car accident ruined my hands. My operating days were over. I thought my life was finished. But, I turned my life around. With a mix of ancient Eastern wisdom and Wall Street savvy, I can turn your life around too.
Mole Man Subterranean Surveying
What are you looking for? Gold? Petroleum? What geological and hydrological conditions suit your needs? I can find them, guaranteed.
Mastermind’s Master Diet
Lose weight without giving up a thing! You’ll swear your eating and drinking all your favorite things, when you’re really eating healthy vegetables and spring water.
< Bosda vigorously applies the Wet Trout >
I could see Superman (as well as several others) going into pro boxing. Heavyweight Champion of the World!!..Misssssterrrrrrrrrrrrr Clarrrrrrrrrrrk KENT!
Spider-Man originally tried to go into show business via wrestling. The version as presented in the first movie is pretty close to how the comics presented it, although IIRC he had a successful stage performance after the wrestling but couldn’t get paid because he had no way to cash a check made out to “Spider-Man.”
Re Spider-Man
In an issue where Mysterio is attempting to make Spidey think that his life has been an illusion, Spidey wakes up to find that he’s a celebrity.
“But, I couldn’t cash the check.”
“We set you up as a corporation and let the lawyers worry about it, remember kiddo?”
(Sigh.)
I know. Believe me, I KNOW! I HAD that comic book IN MY HAND, first appearance. If only I’d hung onto that thing! :wally :wally :wally
There was a Mr. Boffo comic strip once. The caption read “A world without crime” and there was a picture of a van with the logo “Clark Kent Movers Inc.”
Firestorm or Element Lad could make a fortune selling raw materials.
Matter Eater Lad would have a great future in toxic/radioactive waste disposal.
The Purple Man would make quite the door to door salesman ( “Ah, Ms Smith; would you mind buying everything in this catalogue ?” ).
The Chameleon or Chameleon Lad could work as body doubles.
Actually that’s very funny when you think about it a minute. He’d certainly be able to love up to the name Mr Fantasic wouldn’t he. There’s a beer commercial where a guy sticks his tongue all the way down a beer bottle to get the last drop. When he looks up two girls at the bar are stareing at him in wide eyed appreciation. There’s an old joke about a guy who picked up women by licking his eyebrows. reed could do that and much more.
Also very funny. 
Really. Man. I’d love to have that power at work. The temptation would be to influence to buy too much and really screw themselves financially. If you only used it on those who were really thinking about it to keep them in your store and to save time. People who take a freakin hour to decide would decide in ten or 15 minutes.
The temptation would be pretty strong though. Power corrupts.
Hey, wouldn’t Purple man also be good to help people stop drinking, or smoking, or to help people lose weight. He might also help folks with unhealthy compulsions. He could bve a free lance counselor and do great without anyone knowing. Charge the wealthy hefty fees but also do lots of pro bono work for the poor. That would be a very cool subtle power.
SomethingAwful did a great Photoshop Phriday contest on this theme Way Back When. Dr. Doom as a pediatrician, Doc Ock working in Hentai, Hulk as a Hallmark Greeter…
My favorites, due to dialogue included on the picture, were General Zod on the Weather Channel, and Lex Luthor as a DeeJay.
One of Marvel’s other mind controllers was doing this for a while. Mesmero I think. Tried to be legit but got blackmailed back into crime.
Give Wolverine a top of the line digital video camera (massive amount of storage, very rugged, waterproof, etc) and he would make an excellent nature show host. He can move near silently, stay downwind etc. His healing factor, strength and reflexes mean that he wouldn’t have to worry about injury. He has a great knowledge of wilderness and zoology. He loves the unspoiled wilderness.
“If the new condo development goes through, this place will cease to exist. You see these berries? They’re poisonous to humans. But, they are a staple in the diet of the red crested warbler. Let’s find a place to sit and wait. Here on the ground are warbler droppings. Perhaps we’ll be able to hear its beautiful song”
or
“Now remember, do not try this! I’m a professional. Now, I shall pick up the cottonmouth with my right hand and milk it with my left.”