According to 20 people, Superman (or someone very like him) was seen flying over western Romania.
Og damnit. I didn’t think that village was occupied. I was looking for a good place to stop and take a leak.
I hear one claimed to see the word “Macy’s” on the back of the Superman suit.
Superman’s suit isn’t “shiny.” Either the witnesses were mistaken, or there was an error in translation, or that wasn’t Superman.
It’s common for imitation Superman suits to appear unrealistically shiny, though; terrestrial synthetics aren’t yet equal to the task of reproducing the rich quality of Kryptonian textiles. My guess is that this sighting was of an impostor Superman, no doubt as part of some diabolical plot to alarm the population of Eastern Europe. Could this herald the return of infamous techno-criminal Lex Luthor? This seems like his sort of handiwork.
I’ve always thought the glossy look just wasn’t right for a superhero suit. So how do you make a sheer bodystocking without using glossy fabrics like silk or Spandex?
I’m gonna make a WAG and say “shiny” = “bright”, mangled in translation.
(emphasis added)
Clearly not Superman.
Is twenty people enough for it to be considered mass hysteria?
Standing position? That’s totally Magneto. Uh-oh.
He was just flying over Romania on his way to Latveria. There’s a big DC/Marvel crossover special this holiday season.
It was Voldemort in drag.
(Bolding mine) Apart from the fact that Consantin really likes his ţuică, doesn’t anyone have a problem with Superman cruising?
Superman was clearly walking in his sleep again.
Cue inevitable and tasteless joke about Wonder Woman and the Invisible Man. 
What happened to plain old UFOs? Are flying saucers not good enough anymore?
Ah, but could it be the “Red Son” Superman?
Lies! It’s all lies! I was holed up in the Fortress of Solitude all weekend!
Hmmm. It looks like Superman but the suit is shiny and he’s not flying right? It must be Bizarro-Superman!