Supporting a friend through Ovarian Cancer

In My Humble Opinion
1

I’ve recently made contact with an old girlfriend through Facebooks and we’ve hooked up a couple of times for coffee - we’re both happily married now, so there’s none of that awkwardness. She’s got Ovarian cancer and has just had a hysterectomy and is on chemo (her third kind, as the others either haven’t worked or were not kind to her). She wasn’t a child-wanting kind of woman, but having that option taken away from her has been hard.

I want to be there for her as best I can and was hoping that there might be Dopers who’ve been through (on either end) a similar relationship/journey and might have thoughts to offer, advice to share or stories to tell.

Thanks
Grim

2

Sorry to hear about your friend’s illness. I have a loved one who is also battling ovarian cancer. If you’re looking for resources related to the disease, I recommend http://www.ovariancancer.org/ as a starting point.

I’m not sure what stage she is at or the exact kind of cancer, but if we are talking about epithelial ovarian cancer (the most common form), unfortunately many ovarian cancer patients are not diagnosed at a curable stage and recurrance of the cancer is common. Try to prepare yourself for the likelihood that she will have to spend the rest of her life on one form of chemotherapy or another to keep the cancer in check. The good news is that even though ovarian cancer is often not curable, it can often be treated and controlled for a prolonged period of time (switching between drugs as the cancer become resistant to one form of drug), and several promising experimental drugs are in the pipeline that offer reason for hope. In my loved one’s case, she has had a pretty good quality of life despite being on chemotherapy almost constantly for nearly 2 years. We still can do stuff together like traveling to fun places.
If you’re willing to keep her company when she needs someone, but also willing to give her space when she doesn’t feel up to dealing with people (i.e., feeling sick from chemo and just wanting to be left alone) then I’d say you’re doing fine. All the best to her.