So I’m at lunch, reading my newspaper and chewing on a burger-n-fries, when in walks a teenage boy and his female consort. He’s talking loudly on a cell phone. They get their order and settle into a booth directly behind me. It becomes apparent that he is skipping school and momma found out. She’s on the other end of the phone conversation. As he argues more and more loudly, I find his story to be more interesting that the newspaper, so I evesdrop - or more accurately I quit trying to actively block out his voice. Here’s a transcript of a bit of the conversation:
Him: Mom, I’ve only missed two days this whole year! {pause for Mom’s reply} Him: Two days, Mom. We’ve been in school for, like, six weeks. Five days a week. That’s six times five. {turns to girlfriend} What’s six times five? GF: 35 Him: {back to Mom} Yeah! 35 days and I’ve only missed 2! What’s the big deal? Huh? Oh, 30 days. That’s still just 2 days out of 30… Three weeks? We’ve only been back in school 3 weeks? Well, it seems like longer…
At that point I lost it. I still don’t think he knows what I found so funny.
I’m hoping his gf gets a job working the register at my local favorite McD’s.
“Let’s see, Sir. Your order comes to $5.75. You gave me $10.00. You’re change is ummmm… (this is where her brilliant math skills shine through) $17.50. Have a nice day!”
Great. What if he and his girlfriend decide to breed? :eek:
So, class, if school has been in session for three weeks and Einstein here has already missed two days, extrapolate how many days he will miss by the end of the school year.
No cheating!!
(He’s probably driving too. Perfect. :rolleyes: I hate stupid people.)
Let’s see… hmmm… school has been in session three weeks. Einstein has missed 2 days. There are 8 days in a week (Cite: The Beatles). 8 x 3 = 28. So that’s 28 - 2 = 24. Einstein has been in school 28 days and has been present for 24 of those days. There are 180 days in a US school year. That means there’s like eight 28 day periods in a school year. If Einstein is in school 24 out of every 28 days, that means he will miss 12 days of school.
iampunha just for that, may you’re next Big Mac contain no special sauce, may the two all beef patties be burned, may the lettuce be wilted, may the cheese be hot and drip on your crotch, may the pickles and onions be rancid, and may all the seeds on the sesame seed bun stick in your teeth.
Well, let’s ask McEinstein himself. Oh, wait. He doesn’t even know what five times six is, so what are the odds he knows what “extrapolate” means? Never mind…
“Twins? WTF? How am I supposed to take care of three kids?”
And come on people, there is no way this kid is ever allowed to handle money or touch a till. If you ask me, he sounds like management material.
[Homer]
Only management guys like me can wear a hat like that. Wait. I’m a guy like me.
[/Homer]
When I worked at McDonald’s there was a girl who could not count money yet was inexplicably allowed to work on the registers. She always came at whoever was standing nearby and asked how much money was in her hand.
