Television is trying to kill me.

Not so long ago, I discovered that I had high blood pressure and high cholesterol. I always knew that this day might come, and have been prepared to take aggressive countermeasures (sort of the dietary equivalent of the “can I do it until I need glasses” school of thought on masturbation).

So, a new day has dawned in casa de Binarydrone. A day of low sodium and fat and a comprehensive and regular program of exercise. And by Og, it is working! In spite of my love for snacks with salty goodness, I am being virtuous. I have lost close to 10 pounds in the past month, and my blood pressure has gone from high to the low end of high normal. I do miss the pizzas and chips, the delicious Doritos dipped in cheese and all of those things that are so bad for you but so freaking satisfying. But I do this because, at the end of the day, I love being alive more than I love any of those things.

But, because I have been denying myself things that I traditionally have enjoyed, I have noticed that it really seems as if my television is trying to kill me.

Ooh, have some delicious chips, the svelte model eating them can do so, so why can’t you? Come to the restaurant and enjoy some deep fried cheese that will clog your arteries, drink sugary soda, obviously all of these healthy people subsist on nothing but grease and sucrose, so why can’t you? Feh!

So this is the thing. I want some truth in advertising! Either make it clear that all of these things that are so damn good should only be a vary rare treat, or mandate that all actors shilling this crap be at least 300 pounds. Honestly, it seems to me that marketing can create a demand for pretty much anything, so why can’t someone create a demand for carrot sticks or something? :mad:

I know what you mean! I never would have even thought up the concept of a bacon cheeseburger pizza if Dominos hadn’t come up with the idea and then flooded the airwaves with it.

Checkers is my latest nemesis. They chose the youngest, fittest looking people possible and show them frequenting Checkers. Sure, cheeseburgers, fries, onion rings, soda and shakes are going to keep you looking like that. Of course!

I absolutely agree that they ought to have to show what their real, average customer looks like. Ever noticed the clientele in an all-you-can-eat pizza place?

Hey! I eat that crap all the time, and I only weigh maybe 135. (I’m 5’10", more or less.)


Congratulations! You have just qualified for the “get bent” club. :stuck_out_tongue:

Bastard. I weighed more than that in 4th grade.

[Bill Clinton] I feel your pain.[/Bill Clinton]

Having had gastric bypass, I see these commercials and think, “WHY DID I DO THIS?!?!”

Actually, if I wanted to, I could eat some junk food, but grease and sugar generally make me sick. Oddly enough, when I was off work this summer after the surgery, I watched the food network all the time. I guess I’m a masochist.

I know just what you mean. Normally I eat pretty healthy, no fast food, very little junk food, but there’s nothing more effective at making me crave it than those TV news spots … you know the ones …

‘Deadly Killer Fat Found in Fried Potato Products … warning, if you eat these delicious, golden, crispy french fries it will instantly clog your arteries, leading to certain, painful death’ and they show pictures of delicious, golden, crispy french fries, and potato chips, and other tasty things …

Curse you.

In an effort to save money (and because all my free time is now dedicated to my studies), I turned off the TV permanently 2 years ago (I did watch BTVS until it ended but that doesn’t count). And cancelled my magazine subscriptions. I find that I am much happier with myself when I’m not bombarded with have other people’s ideas of how I should be.

Just sayin’.

You mean you’ve never noticed the fine print at the bottom of the screen that says,

The actors appearing in this commercial message are professional bulimics. DO NOT try these food stunts at home.