Tell me about being a bouncer

Every now and then someone tells me I should be a bouncer. Of course, the problem is that I’m about the least intimidating person there is. Talking to some people who are bouncers, I have to wonder why anyone wants this job.

I am, however, fascinated by their skills at dealing with all sorts of people: drunks looking for fights, sober people looking for fights, spectacles, etc.

Anyone work as a bouncer or have any stories/insights into their deep psychological…insights?

It is the worst job in the world.

You work all night while everyone else is out partying and having a good time. For shit money.

You end up smelling like smoke and whatever got spilled on you.

Drunk people want to fight you or tell you that they love you.

Kids want to buy/flirt/dash/sneak their way in.

You have to be conciliatory, polite, yet be ready for crazy things to happen.
And all of this despite the fact that if you ever HAVE to fight/bounce people/put hands on someone, it’s likely not the kind of place you want to work anyway.
The ideal “bouncer” job is “doorman.” If you’re “bouncing,” find another line of work. It won’t end well, either psychologically or physically or even monetarily.

Yup, Happy pretty well covered it.

Find a different calling if you can.

More than you could ask for, and a fascinating read:

I read the July 6 post, and… bravo.

Is this what you want to do?

Bouncers are some of the most cynical people to hang out with, because of things like this.

Sell Big Macs, dude. It’s more rewarding.

An old friend of mine was a bouncer in a stripper bar. On the plus side, he got free drinks and he got to hang out with (and occasionally date) the strippers.

On the minus side, oh where do I start? He told me the stark realities of the brutality business. “There are things that happen in a bar fight that will have you in and out of the hospital for life. And what are you paid to risk injury every night? Busboy wages, and no health insurance. Get badly hurt on the job, and you’re fired.”