Tell me about your colonoscopy

I’ve had two and it’s a bit of a horror story, but I’m fine, I’m OK, don’t worry.

I had the night before ritual like others have described and ditto all the advice they’ve given. Be prepared to sit on the toilet for some time the night before.

On my first scope, the doctor removed a precancerous node from the intestine and then could not stop the bleeding. The ended up wheeling me out to recovery, then wheeling me back in to take another whack at cauterizing it. There was a monitor that the doctor watches that I could see as well and it was interesting watching that while I could. I do remember falling unconscious during the procedure and then waking up in recovery only to be taken back in.

My wife was there to pick me up and they made her wait and wait and wait for me without explaining what was going on because there was some sort of disconnect between the recovery area and the front desk. I was in there a long time and she was flipping out because of it until we were eventually reunited. Ever have one of those stressful moments where you bring up humor as a defensive mechanism? My wife had that and it was cranked up to 11. I think the doctor got sick of the jokes, but he was very gracious about it considering the circumstances.

Because of the node (there were actually two, but fortunately only one was precancerous), I had another scope a year later. For some luck of scheduling, I had it the day after my cousin’s St. Patrick’s Day party. I do not recommend getting scoped the day after you have to go to a party because then you end up sitting around and you miss drinking the beer and eating the corned beef.

The second scope turned out fine and I remained awake and watching the monitor for the whole thing. The doctor then told me to come back in two years, which I think is about 3 years ago by now.