I recently moved to NYC and have been interviewing/applying for jobs for months, long before I actually packed up my things and came up here. I have one firm offer from a company that I originally turned down and then turned down again when they came back with a better offer. I finally told them I would take the 3rd offer that would start on the 25th of this month, but so far there has not been a single form signed or anything. Not so much as an offer letter. Besides that, it would take up A LOT of my time and I would pretty much be miserable.
I finally decided today that I can’t take this job since it is something that I never really wanted to do in the first place and I tenatively accepted offer #3 from this company out of fear that I wouldn’t find another job. The commute is insane, an hour each way by train 6 days a week and I don’t know that I could handle spending 60-70 hours a week working and commuting. I decided I can get a McJob if need be while I am applying at other places and I do have a pretty substantial amount of money in savings and could pay 3 or 4 months rent and utilities without a problem.
My problem is that I have NEVER in my life been without a job. In my head I see myself dancing for nickels in the 42nd street subway terminal. I see my poor kitten and I living under a bench in the park because I was so convinced I would find something else that I turned down a job that though I wouldn’t enjoy it, it wouldn’t be the worst thing I have ever done either. I need someone to tell me that I am not fucking up my life by telling this woman that I have decided not to take this job after all (I will probably tell her I was offered an astounding amount of money from another company so she doesn’t feel like I am just bailing out on her, but it is still going to be an uncomfortable conversation to say the least.)
So dopers, anyone else ever done this kind of thing? Ever turn down a job when you had no job at all and make it through without resorting to ramen noodles for every meal?
Take the job! Every second you sit on your ass you are losing your money, eating up your savings. 3-4 months really isn’t as long as it sounds. The time will fly by before you even realize it. Look, you might as well give the job a try, who knows you may even enjoy some aspects of it. But in the meantime you will be making money which is important to you and your kitty and you can always get another job a little bit down the road.
I agree with pool. If you’re worried about money, take this job for now and keep looking. If you’re only there for a month or two before you find something you like better, you can always honestly say things weren’t working out because of the commute, or the hours, or whatever. But really, are you serious in saying you’d rather work at McDonald’s than at this job? If that’s the case, get a job there instead… no harm done if you take it and quit after a month or two… would you really put that on your resumé anyway?
My problem is that if I take this job I will spend 45-50 hours a week working and an additional 2 hours a day commuting, 1 hour each way. I will have no time to interview for another job at all, so if I take this job it is with the intention of saving up money to have 8-10 months living expenses so I can quit and look for a different job at that time. If it were a different schedule and I could feasibly look for another job while working this one I would do that. That is why I figured a part time retail job or whatever would work because I could work evenings and weekends and leave my days open to interview with companies in my field. Now I’m confused and even more scared than I was when I posted.
You don’t say what your field is, so it’s hard to say. Obviously jobs aren’t thick on the ground for whatever it is you do, because you’ve been looking for a longish time. But what are the realistic odds of your finding a more congenial working arrangement before you’re reduced to duking it out with the cat for the leftover kibble?
How big a cushion do you have? I’m assuming it’s not very large. So…one of the most expensive cities to live in AND no job AND no savings. That’s a bad combination. What’s your backup option if everything goes south? Can you head back home? Can you realistically support yourself on a McJob salary? Will it cover the rent?
Realistically, brutal commutes are part and parcel of life in the Big City. You might have to accept that.
Well, I am in insurance so it is a big enough field to be working in. I have 3-4 months living expenses, an emergency fund not included in that, and about $7000 worth of credit on cards that is available to me (I don’t carry a balance and pay everything off each month even though my APR is 0% on one card and 3.9% on the other.) The reason I was looking for a longish time was because I was looking from about 1500 miles away in Dallas. Now that I have been here for about 10 days I have had 3 interviews with different companies, one of which decided not to offer me the position and one of which I haven’t heard back from as of yet. The job I am considering turning down is the only one that would speak to me knowing I didn’t currently live in the city.
That’s easier said than done when you’ve got to pay the rent.
I agree with the above replies, though. If the job is as miserable as you think it will be, take it for now and start looking elsewhere soon. If you need time to interview, take a sick day.
Plus you have to deal with the irony that it is easier to get a job when you have one. If you are not working companies seem to figure there must be some reason you are out of work.
If you work and look it will likely be more successful.
I hope I don’t get hit over the head with a bunch of old ladies’ purses for this but…
You don’t need to pay off your CC balance in full each month. Really, you don’t. It may be a nice status symbol for you and make you feel good about yourself but in times like this it can be a money waster for you. Having a CC balance doe not automatically put you in a spiral towards “in debt over my head.” You can be just as “good with debt” by being IN debt as you can by not being in any debt. You don’t have to rack up $7k in CC debt either. Just be smart about it.
That being said, it sounds like you are pretty well-off financially, you’re finally IN NYC and you really don’t want this one job, and it’ll keep you from getting the job you want. So my vote is to keep looking for the job you want, at least for a little while.
I think that you should listen to your instincts. Something inside of you does not like this at all. Listen to that. It sounds like you have an excellent rainy day fund and I think you will be OK. The problem with working in a job you hate, which also has long hours, is that not only does it suck away the time you need to find something you actually want, but it can suck away your self-esteem and motivation :eek:.
This happened to me when I was laid-off from my job, waiting to hear back from a job I really wanted (emergency operator for university), and interviewing as a back-up. I saw huge red flags at the back-up interview (financial planning firm). After my first interview, which I didn’t feel went well at all, I was actually glad that I probably wouldn’t hear from them again :dubious:. Guess what? I did.
I was undergoing a background check for the emergency operator job that had stretched out for 3 months and did not show any signs of getting completed. I queried the people I trusted most and they recommended that I take the administrative position at the financial planning firm, so that I could learn about money and not have an opposing schedule to my husband’s (the emergency job was graveyards). I went ahead and accepted the offer :smack:. I heard back from the emergency job the day after I started and told them I had accepted another offer.
The financial planning job was horrible. I worked for a tyrant who treated employees worse than anyone I have ever heard of (not to mention allowed awful sexual harassment of her employees). By the time I quit, I was coming home exhausted and crying every night and was ready to chuck it all and become a waitress :(. I did manage to get an administrative job at the university in the bottom of the ninth inning.
I ended up with some interesting stories and some special investment account options from the financial planning job, but I still wonder if I would be a happier person today if I had held out for the job I really wanted. In the end, I think it all worked out because the university is a safe and good environment, even though I do not like administrative work. However, all this unhappiness has revealed to me what I really want to do (I am currently making steps in that direction) :).
My advice would be to not let fear drive you to a choice that you know is wrong for you. I did, but hope that the lesson I learned will make it all worthwhile (I am still recovering from some of the things that happened to me there). After all, why did you do such a great job of putting together a rainy day fund if not to have some freedom to make the best choice for yourself? I wish you the best with your decision :).
I remember your situation from this thread, pbbth. From the specifics you give in that thread, I’d say definitely keep looking for a while. You have a great apartment with shockingly low rent, you don’t like sales and the other job would require a lot of training such that you’d feel bad if you didn’t stay some minimum amount of time.
If you can’t find anything after two months of hard, daily job searching, I’d consider taking the sales job, but I’d also probably give up the great apartment and move as close as I could to knock down that commute. Long stressful work hours + long commute is a recipe for misery.
I was going to say one hour commute isn’t so bad, but I didn’t realize it was two trains and a bus. And you know you’ll hate it? How has your other searching gone? Any nibbles, or completely cold? Have you look at temp agencies to work part-time while looking? Or employment agencies?
I would be scared to be without a job but if you have a few months’ savings, take a little time to keep looking.
You are single, without dependants? With little to no debt.
I say go for what you want. Follow your instincts.
If you were married or had kids, you wouldn’t have this freedom.
You are beginning a very exciting of your life. Don’t go too conservative. Go Long. baby. Go Long.
