Hmmm. . . Any chance it was a guy named ‘Larry,’ who looked like Little Richard?
I have had a bunch of shockingly inappropriate converations with pushy black women.
I don’t get them, and i am not completely sure what it is about ME that bothered them. It could have been something simple like how i was taller then they or maybe it was that I said I wanted to take courses at the community college nearby.
One woman said she hoped that my husband would beat the piss poor attitude out of me.
This prizewinner also told me that i needed to get married and have kids ASAP …although she had 3 children, and her kids were doing poorly in school, as the were staying up late watching tv while mommie dearest worked nights.
One annoying 19 YO girl was shocked that i had not planned my wedding out, despite the fact that not only was i not dating, even NOW i only know two men i would consider marrying.
One woman said I should become a nun. The irony is that I’m an Atheist.
Okay so picture starting a new job. It’s a management postion and it’s Wednesday of your first week. The female director of another department is standing in line for the ice cream truck that visits every Wednesday. As this is a favorite office tradition and it’s a sunny summer day there are dozens of employees surrounding you from both her department and yours. What do you think would be an appropriate topic of conversation?
Hint: “Hey Sue, are you a licker or a biter” was not considered appropriate.
Unfortunately HR only required a written apology and I had to continue working for this useless waste of skin for just under a year before they fired him. I think they used the vodka in his desk drawer as the final excuse but the multiple complaints to HR about him leering into womens chests as he talked should have done it without that.
I think of the time I overheard a woman shout at a couple of my coworkers, but also to our office in general, in a government office no less: “You white boys don’t even believe in God!” She managed to combine religion, sex and race into one superb condemnation. She was also known to have filed complaints about racial and sexists comments from others so fortunately nobody responded to this outburst.
“I want your cock in my mouth”.
That was highly inappropriate.
But fun.
My favorite restaurant “conversation” was when one of the cooks came bolting out of the kitchen after one of the waitresses, shouting in a heavy Hispanic accent “I’ll cut your tits off you (garbled Spanish insult) !” Unfortunately, he was holding a cleaver. The head chef/owner managed to wrestle him to the ground before he could injure anyone. Surprisingly to me, he kept his job and the waitress quit.
I was a blackjack dealer in Mississippi back in the 1990’s. One day I was in the breakroom and talking with this probably early 60ish white woman, someone easily old enough to be my mother.
The lady and I smoked and sitting there having a cigarette with her, this matronly woman starts talking about her grandson or some male family member wanting a job with the company, with her advising him that he could not secure employment there until…
"He shaves that pussy off his face."
That was tops. That happened about 15 years ago and is still on my brain file. I never knew that women even said the word “pussy” and especially not grandma!
We also had a supervisor who was my age who whispered in my ear on a game “How much did that nigger lose?” That was a bit unprofessional and rude. If dude said “How much did that motherfucker lose…” it would not be so bad. The guy was an asshole whose similary asshole redneck trash wife caught him boinking another girl at the house when he thought she was at work.
Damn, I hated Harrah’s Tunica.
I was working as a receptionist at a real estate office. The owner/broker was in his office with one of the female salespeople and called me in so I could help settle an argument they were having. The debate? Whether or not she should have a breast augmentation in order to increase her sales (he was for the surgery, she thought she was just fine as she was).
Not a conversation, but I once worked for a company that hired a new general manager. He shut off all the hot water in the buildings in order to save money, made it policy for all female employees to wear skirts and pantyhose, and made it the job of the female employees to clean the breakroom every day. This was in 2005. He had a little rebellion on his hands.
I worked for another company that had “Fun Friday” once a month and we were required to log into a company-wide conference call. They started each call with a very long, very Baptist prayer. Luckily, everyone in my little satellite office spent the time surfing the net, but it was really inappropriate.
There were plenty of inappropriate conversations at the place I worked for in California, but the standout had to be the time when my boss made reference to the lesbian orgy she’d attended the previous weekend. Now that was a classic.
Can you define “very Baptist prayer”?
I don’t suppose she went into greater detail?
You know, not just, “Thank you, God, for our many blessings, amen”, but “Thank you, our Lord, Jesus Christ, [5 minutes of listing every good thing they can think of and another 5 of things they’d like to see happen posthaste] in Jesus’ name, amen.” Long, free-form, lots of Jesus, very detailed. As opposed to a quick blessing. I grew up in a family that is primarily Baptist - this is the kind of blessing I usually have to sit through before every (extended) family meal.
No dancing while praying? 
Sorry I got called away or I would have told the whole story.
OK–so the situation was this. She and another (female) co-worker and I were heading back from a conference. Co-worker, who’s driving, and boss start talking about breast implants (it says something about our office at the time that this didn’t even raise an eyebrow). Boss said something like, “Oh, my friend is thinking about getting those done.” Co-worker, who’s driving as usual for her at about 100 mph down the freeway, asks, “Yeah, how does that come up in conversation?” Boss says, “Well, my girlfriend and I were at a party and (friend) asks if she can feel our boobs so she can get an idea of what kind of breasts she wants!”
Stunned silence for what seemed like forever. Finally my co-worker, still weaving through traffic at 100 mph, asks, “What the hell kind of party was that?” My boss: “Ummmm…”
Ahhhh, my boss’s boss was the queen of this back when she was breastfeeding. (Working mom, so she pumped in her office.) There was more than one occasion when she’d come stomping back from some meeting that ran overlong, announce to the entire office and also to nobody in particular, “I haven’t pumped in HOURS!” and then slam her door shut.
She could’ve been smoking a doob while barbecuing a goat, but you better believe no one bothered her.
A black colleague was visiting our building in Uganda and talking to one of our local hire Americans (John). The colleague mentioned that one thing he missed was going to the movies in the states. John says “Hey, you know, back when I was a kid, we called the balconey ‘nigger heaven’, haw haw!” Stunned silence and the black dude mumbled something and left. I asked John what the fuck was he thinking, saying something like that? “Well, that’s what we called it!” Right, but don’t you think that possibly that was a poor choice of anecdote, considering the audience? “But I’m married to an African woman!” :rolleyes: Unfortunately, there were a lot of verbal gaffes from this guy that nearly got him fired by the Ambassador. It didn’t help that he was a drunk.
Hey, I remember him! Larry the COBOL guy.
Oh you reminded me of the woman I knew at previous job. She got pregnant twice while I was there, and the STORIES! I do NOT want to know about discharge, especially not the color or texture or that you had it yesterday. Or the details of pushing that golf ball through your garden hose. She stopped telling me after a few horrified looks but other people kept listening.
I feel sick just thinking about it. I should never ever be told anything about my coworker’s vaginas. I am willing to shut my mind to the fact that that baby just came out of it, but presumably you’ve cleaned it up since and I definitely don’t want to hear any placenta stories.
Many years ago, I worked in the warehouse of a vending machine company. The drivers would give me their orders, and I’d pick the candies, etc. from the warehouse shelves and put them on skids, and the drivers would then load up their trucks. It was a very small company, maybe 10 drivers total, and just the warehouse manager and myself filling the orders.
One day, I came from the warehouse to the driver’s door area, and saw a group of people (at least one woman among them) talking, with one holding a large dildo. The guy then unzips his pants, sticks the dildo down his pants and out his fly, then waves it around.
They all had a good laugh. I didn’t. Instead, I rolled my eyes, and went back to work. By the way, IIRC, at least one company executive was among the group.
Not really a conversation, but still kinda fits: I worked at an auto parts distributor, and one day I needed to get paperwork out of one of the company trucks (stupid driver left it in the truck instead of turning it in). I climb up in there, and in a box next to the seat (an open box) was a penis pump and a jar of vaseline. :eek:
I fortunately did not have to have the conversation with the driver - the manager wondered why I came into the office red-cheeked and giggling (it was both funny and embarrassing). He was generally pretty calm, but this event pissed him off.