You know, if I’m walking around work all morning with my back pocket sticking inside out, could you please fucking tell me? I do not enjoy looking like a SMACKED ASS all day.
Same goes for my shirt collar not being buttoned - I sometimes forget in the morning rush, so no, it’s not a fashion statement.
(And any purient comments about asses and smacking them will involve me smacking your ass.)
Esprix
What’s a “smacked ass”?
I can’t really imagine it from the context of your post.
FWIW, I always tell people if their tags are poking out of their shirts, if thats any consolation.
Fuck, I must look like smashed rotting maggot filled ass in that case.
I wear ripped pants and NBA jerseys to work half the time.
c’mere, baby. 
I had a nice man on the Coaster this morning tell me that a bird had crapped on my shoulder. Not something I really wanted to hear but it was important information none the less. 
P.S. Sorry about your ass Esprix.
Northeastern US slang for “complete idiot.”
Esprix
Ah, I understand.
Well:
“Your pocket is hanging out, your hair is sticking up, and you have a piece of food on your face. It’s a chicken wing. It’s been there for three days.”
Better?
Funny, I’ve never heard of that in my 30 years of existence, all of it in the Northeast.
Maybe he means Maine. That’s pretty northeast.
A donkey on heroin?
Band name! Odd, I haven’t heard that expression either…
Psst. Esprix! Your fly’s open.
OG SMACK!
Neither me, but everyone around me is going to be hearing it until I get tired of it.
I had to tell a friend about her dragon breath once, Esprix, and she ended up thanking me… so know that I can be counted upon to always let you (gently) know of your smack-assedness.
Is that a promise? Will Q be involved in the smaking ass, too?
See. I got so excited at the thought of Esprix smacking my ass I couldn’t even spell it correctly.
Could be, they are pretty strange up there.
Philadelphia, actually. Maybe it was just my mother.
Esprix
Um, you have a little piece of food caught in your teeth, Esprix.
And um, your fly is open.
Other than that, you look really nice today.
What sort of folks do you work with, Esprix?
Nobody playing the “My gaze is not now, nor has it ever been, directed at Esprix’s round, firm, and usually sensibly-dressed bottom. No sir, most assuredly not,” game, I hope?
since my work involves dealing with customers face to face, i much rather someone , like my coworkers tell me i have something in my teeth, fix my colar or alert if something is wrong…like i do to them…
…shish…am i the only one who cares?