Since I’ve gone into the depressive phase of my disorder* it seems like a good time to hear about Dopers’ shattered, broken dreams which can never be put right again. The things you will never get back - those golden, lovely wishes that life took and utterly shat upon until nothing is left but heartwrenching despair.
Me? I always wanted to travel. I wanted to perhaps take a road trip and go all over the country - maybe even jog around Canada and Mexico while I was at it. Sadly, I never got to do so. In part, I suppose I could blame not wanting to go alone. I thought it would be much more fun to travel a friend, and nobody ever wanted to go. But mostly, it was money. A trip like that would cost money which I could “invest” in education, or save for later. So I saved and invested and in the end probably got jack shit out of it, working all the time to get more money that didn’t go to my entertainment. Now I’m in the 30’s, I work day and frequently night, and the odds of ever being able to really travel like I wanted to are pretty much nil. it’d be impossible to take two weeks of vacation, much less four or more, and I hate to even take one.
So my dream is dead, and I’ll probably never have the opportunity again. Given the way budgets are going tits-up, I find it highly improbably that I’ll be able to retire before my 80’s, leaving me most likely too old to do anythig fun and with no family to share it with if I did.
So go on - what’s your biggest disappointment? The one thing you know you’ll never achieve/do/see/experience. What’s that one agonizing fly in your soup, the one thorn in your side that clouds up even the brightest day?
I didn’t get to go to my father’s funeral. I wanted to see how the military lays their own to rest, and I wanted to talk to the people who would be there, and I had some things that I wanted to say, but mostly I just wanted to be there.
Unfortunately, my brothers were responsible for arranging his funeral and none of them wanted to go. So, they signed the paperwork and handed his body over to the military to take care of as they saw fit and never even bothered to find out when or where it was going to happen. I didn’t find out until months later where he was buried; none of his friends knew, or his colleagues, or his friends in the Cairn community. His own sister didn’t know.
I have visited his grave a couple times and as far as I know, I may be the only person who has. I said the things I wanted to say, but it’s not the same.
I wanted to be an Astronaut. I really joined the USAF with that goal. Thats when I learned that my lack of education and bad eyes crashed my dreams. Even with the educational support that one gets in the military, my vision wouldn’t ever be good enough.
I still dream about it. I’m mummbles 30 something and I often wake up thinking about floating in space.
Your goal is more realistic. You wouldn’t be able to do much in a week, but it could happen.
4 years starting in 1997. But that was where I started learning about rescue. So many idiots would get a pet, spoil it and then just leave it when they got transferred.
Have you given any thought to my suggestion that you get involved? Every act of kindness you do makes the world a better place.
Good on you! I don’t eat meat for the same reason, but its a bit of a conundrum for me because cats are obligate canivores. Thank goodness that Kevlar biker gear is as good as leather, that is off the table now.
Honestly, all you have to do to find a rescue group is to go to the nearest big box pet store and talk to the people there. They will love you. You are young and passionate and articulate, and you seem willing to do anything for the cause.
I’m guessing that you are still living with your parents, so you can’t foster critters, but you can still help out in other ways. Most rescue folks are older, so having someone who can lift puppies and bags of food and carriers full of cats is very helpful.
Oh heck, sorry for the thread-jacking, smiling bandit. I will also tell you that my current dream is to not have any more unwanted pets…which is why I’m trying so hard to get Anonymous User to get to work.
I can’t save the world, all I can do is clean up backyard and get people to work on cleaning up their backyards too. While education is important, and Anon will be great at that, someone still needs to do the scut work. Anon could make such a difference there as well.
Dance. I always wanted to learn to dance. I mean, I can dance at a wedding. But I always wanted to learn Latin dancing. ( I fear I have no excuse, I worked in a Mexican restaurant with a band, for several months. Also learned no Spanish. Would have come in very handy when I went to South America. What a dolt!:smack:)
I also always wanted to put in the time and get a lot better at painting water colours. I’ve now pencilled it in for my retirement, cross my fingers!
I did lots of traveling when I was younger, but still I am not without fear that I won’t get to some places that I’d like to see. I sometimes wonder if I’ll ever climb another volcano, or trek into mountains, ride a third class train all day to some dusty out of the way backwater spot.
Having passed 55yrs, I find myself, for the very first time, acknowledging, that maybe I won’t do those things again. It kills me to accept that as a possibility, to be honest.
Of course I figure I’ll always be able to bask on some pacific beach - no matter how old I am!
Holds left hand up for elbows and wraps my right hand around your back. Its never too late to learn how to dance. Follow me, I won’t trip you.
I take dancing lessons every year. I don’t often get the chance to show off my hawt salsa moves in public, but my cats are good partners when I’m in the mood.
It makes me happy, ticks off the cats and when I do dance in public, I impress people. Hows that for a win-win hobby?
Agreed. Maybe there are some people out there who are rich enough to go bum around Europe in their 20s, but I think it’s pretty common that people have to wait to travel until they have worked a few years and have some money saved. I am just getting started on my travel goals because I never had the time or money for it when I was younger.
Even if it’s really true that you will never be able to take more than a week off from work ever again, you can still do a lot of cool things in one week blocks.
I was content to believe “the one that got away” married someone who showed her love. Found out years later it was mostly a loveless marriage which made it a bitter loss. So I guess it’s the same as Foggy’s relent. If you are lucky enough to find the right person everything else is less of a chore and more of an adventure.
To the op, you don’t have to travel the world to explore it. Interesting stuff is all around you. Tack on a day to a weekend and go someplace you’ve never been to. Heck, there are 104 days in a year with your name on it without using a single vacation day.
I always wanted to live abroad for a while. I even had something lined up, a marketing job in London, but it fell apart at the last second (that pretty much sucked), and then I went to law school and now things are different, and circumstances make it look less likely. To be honest, I’m sure I could make it happen if I really put my mind to it, but it’s not what I choose to focus my energy on right now. So I wouldn’t say my dream is crushed, more that my priorities changed.
My second one was more of a disappointment, and it didn’t have any earth-shaking ramifications in my life, but still, it was a bummer. Three years ago, my best friend was supposed to visit me in NYC during a period of free time before I started a new job and we were going to all sorts of fun things since we finally had some money AND time, at the same time. I usually visit her since its hard for her to leave the farm, (which I am glad to do, she lives on 40 stunning acres in the Shenandoah foothills), so for her to visit me was a special occasion. She got snowed in by freak snowstorms, twice, and had to cancel. Soon after she became pregnant and I started work. Recently, she had a second child. So if she were to visit me, it would probably be with her kids. Which, nothing against her kids, it’s just a different dynamic and the moment’s passed. And I know its ridiculously selfish of me to complain, it was no fault of hers she couldn’t come and she was also quite sad about it, but, there ya go.
I missed 2 funerals of 2 great people because an Asshat Boss decided to say i couldn’t have the time off to go. I miss them; they were great people to me (who taught a lot to a selfish little boy who really did listen).
Should I have screamed “F-ck You, I Quit!” and gone anyway? I certainly wish so now. I lost contact with so many people and families in the town my parents grew up in.
I Most Sincerely Regret That.
At any concert, the closest I ever got to the stage was 20 rows back in the orchestra. They were actually pretty good seats until the 3 cheerleaders in front of us started taking turns doing the A-frame shoulder stand & blocking the view.
FTR- Bryan Adams Sounds Great, but I’ll always wonder how good his stage show is.
I’ve never spent time on the other coast. The flights are expensive and I never get the time off. I hear its nice.
I never got to meet or will get to meet so many of the people who have and do inspire me. Some of the best parts of a job which I am leaving were the external contractors hired to check on us. Some beat the hell out of me (and for good reason) and some were just great.
No… wrong… they ALL were just great. I’ll never really get the chance to say “Thank You” or how much I truly enjoyed working with them… or even that I’m going to really miss them (which is Very true).
This.
And John Ritter, who taught the world subtlety in humor.
And John Candy, who taught the world that yeah, the heavy guy in the room Can be the coolest one there.
And James Doohan, who made me want to learn. (But did I?)
I wanted to make a difference in my job. I wanted to make somebody out there smile & offer them a better day. In the end, I bounced off the world like a tennis ball. I never made a difference, I never even made a dent. One of the things that drives me to write and to post is because I want to make that dent. The armor of misery & sadness is Not impenetrable, and if I have to break bones and bloody my hands to pulp, I WILL make that dent…
