That Something Extra in My Coffee

My favorite mug was in the sink from the day before. It’s special. A huge bright red-orange glaze with yellow tulips. Bound to wake almost anyone up.

I’d been saving the last of the Special Edition Coffeemate Creme Brulee flavored creamer for just such a groggy, leisurely Saturday morning. I added two heaping teaspoons to the instant Folgers in my mug and then four Equals to top it off.

As I filled the mug with hot water, I checked with Mr. Wonderful to see what time the Auburn game started and headed for the computer room for a little pre-game Straight Dope time.

It was just a matter of logging in. I took my first big gulp. Ah! So sweet and hot and fine! Windows clatters to life. Another sip or two and I’m almost read to go.

A little bit of coffee on my tongue has not dissolved. Or is it a piece of coconut? No, I didn’t use the coconut creamer. No, it’s not coffee. It didn’t dissolve in my mouth when I suck on it and roll it around on my tongue. And it doesn’t taste like coffee. More delicate. Subtle. Rice? Not smooth like rice – and softer.

Curiousity overtakes me. I spit it out onto the palm of my hand. It is a dead fly.

Bonus! Extra protein.

I originally thought maybe this involved Bailey’s Irish cream.

It could be worse, it could have been a bat. (There’s a thread around here somewhere talking about a woman who didn’t discover a dead bat in her coffee until she was finished with it.)

makes a change from civet droppings…

That shouldn’t be a problem for anyone who drinks instant coffee by choice. :rolleyes:

Sweet! Then you didn’t notice the mickey that I slipped in…
…soon, my plan will come to fruition…

Great. First a fly. Then a mouse. This is why I drink tea.

At least you’re not wearing a Minnie Mouse sweater like poor Alice_In_Wonderland’s dog…

I hate it when my tongue thinks it’s a fly swatter.

At least it wasn’t a turnip.

This strikes me as a good last line for a haiku.

Shaped like a thingy.

My morning coffee
Something extra in my cup
It is a dead fly

[sub]Waits for the Doper haiku mavens to show up and do a better job. [/sub]

Rolling with my tongue
Soft, delicate, tangy, moist
It is a dead fly

Could have been worse. At least it wan’t a “Brundlefly”.

“Help me…Help Me…!”

This can almost be sung to the Folgers jingle

What is in my cup?
The best part of waking up
It is a dead fly

Awaken slowly
Savoring morning coffee
I find a dead fly.

My husband left a coffee mug in the garage for a week and he brought it in full of mouse droppings. WTF.

I wasn’t sure whether to pitch it or bleach it. I bleached it. But I’ll NEVAH use it.

Could have been worse, could have been half a fly