Congratulations!
–Dr capybara (in a significantly less employable and lucrative field).
Now I prescribe a month of absolutely nothing useful-- hammock, gin and tonics, x-box, and fine literature-- mysteries with cats or letters of the alphabet in the title, or, like, elves and orcs and shit. Nothing with “journal of” or “proceedings of the” in the title.
Congrats, Dr Platinabenzenes Smartypants!
I agree entirely. Unfortunately my wife has other plans involving jobs an work and such things, but I’m willing to experiment to find the hypothetical nagging limit.
The MS in '97.
Congrats! Having barely eked out a B in my required Chem 101/102 adventure lo these many years ago, I can sincerely say that I’m impressed by your drive and your smartness.
Many, many questions come to mind: So, what’s your favorite chemical? If you could be a chemical, which one would it be? Did you ever drink any of that stuff in lab? Do you have a secret lab in your basement where you do “experiments”? Did I miss any other tabloid-esque stupid questions?? 
OK, so I really didn’t have any questions. But I wasn’t kidding when I said I am impressed. Here’s hoping you find a great job after a suitable decompression period.
I have an old fashioned question for you, so I just know you’ll be able to answer easily! 
How does one make a Philosopher’s Stone?
Many congradulations, Doctor Christopher, PhD. 
Congrats! So, can you now be asked the eternal question: What’s up, Doc?
strawberry cheescake
Cholesterol, mostly due to its liquid crystalin properties.
The ethanol? errrr how much do you know?
I don’t have a basement but I make beer, intend to make cheese and yes a lab is in the plan just to see what I can do.
You mean the one about my sham marraige just to give my wife a green card while she in turn dresses up in a Princess Leia metal bikini to massage my big toe with her tongue every Sunday?
Nothing to ask, but I wanted to pop in and congratulate you. Enjoy your victory!
Benzenes? As in the chemical that is a part of/from/whatever of gasoline/petroleum? Or is there another kinda benzene?
Oh yeah, Congrats, Dr. Christopher. Now, here, open the jar of pickles for me, wouldja?
What’s the formula for that chemical that turns you into a monster when you drink it, like Mr. Hyde?
As cartoons have taught me, that’s the main use of chemistry right there.
Congratulations, good sir. Or I should say, good Dr. Sir. Now it’s on to practical uses for that degree, such as writing proposals and finding the best conference locations. Remember, there are lies, damned lies, and proposals.
Best wishes for finding that ideal job!
C[sub]29[/sub]H[sub]28[/sub]O[sub]2[/sub]
also known as testosterone
That’s the one. Benzene is the prime example of what chemists call aromatic compounds. Aromatic compounds have an unusual arrangement of electrons. Incidently, while I wouldn’t expose myself to benzene intentionally, people are a little bit hysterical about it. I’m not saying we shoulde be caveleir about it, but you are exposed to much worse things everytime you barbeque.
So, I can buy Perrier again?
Of course, that implies that I’ve ever bought Perrier.
Congrats! Nothing better than being on the other side!
Dr. ITD (Genetics and Biochem).
I bet you liked pchem. (walks away shaking head…)
Congrats, Chem guy!
I have a question: how does the periodic table work? I mean, who decided that hydrogen gets one whatever it gets etc? And who figured out that the table works in whatever way it does. (it’s been over 20 years since I took chem and I never did understand it then).
Thanks. Be brief, concise and specific, if you can. 
Hey, something I can answer!
Well… God did. Hydrogen has one proton in its nucleus, and thus an atomic number of one. Helium has two protons, and thus an atomic number of two. On it goes, all the way up to those elements with atomic numbers in excess of a hundred and really boring names.
As for who made up the periodic table: I don’t know, but the guy was a flippin’ genius.
Congrats, Christopher.
A Russian, Dmitri Mendeleiev. His table didn’t have the rare earths (those two rows that get separated at the bottom), but it did include several spots where he said “ok, we haven’t discovered the element that goes here, but there has to be one or else this doesn’t work, and it’s so good for predicting properties that it would really be a shame if it didn’t work.” That prompted other people to start looking for those missing elements - and finding them
Pretty much all my books have letters of the alphabet in the title, but that may just be me.
Congratulations!