The 15th Annual Steelers March to the Super Bowl Thread

The Game Room
1

Tomorrow is the start of the NFL season, and so today I present the 15th edition of this long-running, self-aggrandizing, incorrect in most details, and wrong 12/14 of the time, anthology. As usual, if this isn’t your cup of tea you’ll find a way to get over it.

Anyway, before I start with the wildly incorrect conjecture, I’d like to address something that has been brought up many times here but still deserves to be mentioned: the Colin Kaepernick situation. Yeah, this should go over well. But I’m going to bring it up anyway because, well, it’s bugging me right now.

So Kaepernick is still a free agent. There are two schools of thought here, broadly speaking. The first is that he’s an average-at-best player and that because of that nobody will take him for fear of alienating their fanbase. The other is that he is being blackballed because he chose a impolitic and offensive way of taking a stand and the NFL owners are collectively punishing him for it.

The truth is probably somewhere in the middle. Here’s how I see it:

He certainly isn’t in the top tier of quarterbacks, be it because of his style of play or the offense he was running, but nobody says his name when they mention the “elite” quarterbacks of the league. Brady, Brees, Rodgers, Roethlisberger, even maybe Eli Manning are names that come to mind. But he’s not so bad that he can’t get a job in the NFL in some capacity. Check out this list. Kaepernick is better in every way than every name on that list. He would, immediately upon signing, be better than every single backup QB in the league with the possible exception of Garroppalo. So it can’t be a lack of talent.

On the other hand, he did piss off a lot of people with his protest and other ancillary things he did. The cop/pig socks? The Castro t-shirt? I mean, the kneeling was enough of a protest without throwing gas on the fire. Miami would have been a great place for him to land when Tannehill went down and yet he was never even considered. Baltimore used his girlfriend as the reason not to sign him, perhaps as cover for the owner who didn’t want to face backlash. The Ratbirds owner didn’t want to face backlash. The man who embraces Ray Fucking Lewis was afraid of being hated for signing Kaepernick. Speaking of which, Mr. Stabby himself weighed in on the topic, strangely trying to make it about himself as usual.

But I digress. The bottom line is this: I don’t think the man did anything wrong. Yeah, it was controversial, but on the NFL controversy scale it rates well below assault, drug use, DUIs, etc. Nobody got hurt and he got his message out, which was an important one and deserved more attention than it got. People were too busy smacking him for the protest to actually consider the substance of the issue. If Pittsburgh signed him I would be OK with that. Really, I would. It’s not like that position hasn’t been fraught with controversy anyway. He’s light years better than Landry Fucking Jones, which at this point, given Ben’s inevitable injury, is as good a reason as any to give him a shot.

There, that’s out of the way. Time to climb off the soapbox and get into the silly optimism and shit-talking that this thread is all about.
So this has been an interesting offseason. Le’Veon Bell asked for a king’s ransom, he held out on signing the Franchise tender, and seriously thinks that any running back in the league will get $15 million a year. Even as a #1 back/#2 receiver, which is his bargaining position, he’s dreaming. Ben toyed with retirement, but everybody knew he would play. If he didn’t he had to pay back $28 million. Yeah, there was never any doubt. Martavis Bryant, presuming he can stay off the chiba, is back after his suspension. The offensive line, one of the best in football, is back for their third year together. They virtually STOLE Vance McDonald from the Niners, a huge upgrade from Jesse James (who will still be the starter early in the season). This offense is even better than last year’s, but it still has one big problem.

Todd. Fucking. Haley.

Seriously. All the weapons any coach could ask for and he turns into a coward the moment the ball crosses the 20. JuJu and Eli Rogers are going to get a ton of work because Pittsburgh is Bubble Screen Heaven. There is no touchdown that will suffice when a field goal will do. If the man ever got his head out of his ass this team would set the scoring record for all time. Alas, it’s going to be another season of heart attack football because that’s what this team does to its fans.

Defensively, there is Ryan Chandel… er, Shazier leading the way. They added T.J. Watt, who seems to be everything they hoped he’d be. The line and the linebacker corps is strong and, with the exception of James Harrison, is very young. The potential Achilles’ heel is, once again, the secondary. What they had last year just didn’t cut it. They didn’t have the personnel to play man defense and the zone was absolutely shredded. Now, a year and a few cuts later, with one huge signing, it looks much, much stronger. I thought they were stuck with Ross Cockrell starting, which was a nightmare in the making. Then the Browns, for some reason dumping salary after taking on Osweiler’s ludicrous contract to stay above the salary floor, gave Joe Haden away. Their loss is Pittsburgh’s gain. Even if he lost a step in the last few years he’s still better than most and at worst a massive step up from Cockrell. Rarely have I been that happy to see a Steelers free agent signing. I still can’t believe how lucky that was.

This team is ready to get yet another shot at New England, which is how it’s going to happen. They pretty much own the AFC North this year. The Ratbirds will have to throw shutouts with their anemic offense, the Bengals are self-destructing goons with Burfict and Pacman both starting the season in their usual place, on the suspension list, and the Browns are in year 18 of their never-ending rebuild. It’s not the AFC North of old, that’s for sure. Still, those games are all dangerous, because division games are bloodbaths. If the Rats only win two games all year (I’d prefer zero) the Steelers are the ones they want to beat. When the Bengals see black they see red and lose their damn minds. Even the Browns, perpetual doormats, put it all out for Pittsburgh.

As for the rest of the schedule, there is a serious possibility that they will go into their week nine bye undefeated. The Packers and the Patsies are the only teams that scare me, and they’ll be good previews for what’s to come because when they win the Super Bowl this year they’ll see both teams again along the way.

I think I’ll skip the record prediction this year. Were I to guess, I’d say that they’ll get at least one home playoff game, but this team yearly defies prediction and drops games they should win, driving me and my fellow Steelers fans batshit crazy. This year will be no different.

And with that, I’ve said enough. Week One is just around the corner.

God, it’s good to have football back again.

2

I am hopeful but my spider sense says Pittsburgh is in for some rebuilding years. Especially after Ben retires.

3

I completely agree about your assessment of the Kaepernick situation. He IS being blackballed. There’s no other explanation. He would be better than almost every other backup in the league except Garrapolo…and AJ McCarron. You forgot about him.

I have to disagree with you calling the Bengals “goons”. That’s a media perception created in the mid 2000’s when we had a bounty of arrests (mostly Chris Henry, Steeler killer, RIP). We’ve never been able to shake that reputation. YES, Burfict is a dirty player, or actually, WAS a dirty player. The Cam Newton ankle twist was dirty. But the Steelers have had and currently have dirty players too. In fact, the Steelers have been voted by the players as the dirtiest team in the league not that long ago. This current suspension is absolute bullshit. The hit was not flagged and he hit the FB in the FRONT. This is yet another example of the NFL creating rules that players and refs don’t understand that result in bullshit penalties and suspensions. The NFL is doing everything it can to legislate big hits out of the game when it used to be celebrated. It’s like Democrats wanting to ban AR-15’s as “assault rifles” because they “look scary”.

As for Pacman…yeah. He’s a headcase and a super emotional player, but you have to like that fiery passion in a guy on your team when so many are just collecting paychecks and not really caring.

Oh yeah, and Ray Lewis is a murderer.

4

Week 2 is upon us, and it’s been a hell of a week for me so I haven’t been able to get back to this until now.

What a game last week. Le’Veon Bell better figure out what’s going on because he was essentially a ghost last week. It didn’t help that the first 8-10 plays were all passes. It makes me wonder if his performance was 50% skipping the entire preseason and 50% Tomlin and Haley making a point with him. In any case, he needs to show up.

Antonio Brown sure showed up, though. He played a hell of a game that nobody even noticed. That was the quietest 11 catch 182 yard performance of all time. It was overshadowed by Bell, the rest of the offense being pure HaleyBall, and the Browns being significantly better than they were last year.

Speaking of which, the Browns are looking competitive this year. They certainly won’t win the division, but they’ll win a few that they aren’t expected to this year. Kizer impressed the hell out of me,only one truly bad decision in spite of being under siege the whole game.

Now, the defense. It wasn’t bad, and T.J. Watt was outrageously good with two sacks and a great interception, but they were lousy with personal fouls. Shazier even got a $25,000 fine for a hit on Kizer. But that said, one of them was bullshit and another was questionable at best. The hit from Gay on the sideline drew a flag ages after the play ended. Tomlin said the refs used the scoreboard to make the call and he’s right, but even so the flag shouldn’t be thrown just because the guy doesn’t get up. And the one on the goal line was stupid because they called it for hitting a defenseless receiver. What was he supposed to do, just let the guy walk in? He caught the ball on the damn goal line.

Anyway, that was the warmup game for the stars. They’d better get it together for the Vikings today or they’ll get hammered like the Saints were last week.

Also, the Bengals. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA deep breath HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! You can’t help but think the Marvin Lewis era is coming to an end. The announcers were openly talking about drafting a new quarterback next year after switching to McCarron sometime this year. Dalton is laying some serious stinkers so far this year. At least one thing is back to normal. Time to break out the paper bags again, Bengals fans. The Bungles are back!

5

As it turns out, Sam Bradford won’t be playing today. That guy is made out of glass, I swear. Instead, it will be the indomitable Case Keenum. This game just got easier, at least on paper.

6

The Bengals are going to turn it around. You’ll see. We have a new offensive coordinator now! Look out!

7

Oh my God the Ratbirds are getting destroyed.

By the Jagwaggers. 37-0. With half the third and all of the fourth to go.

If Pittsburgh doesn’t win this division with ease I’ll be stunned.

8

I’m told the Steelers aren’t going to come out of the locker room for the anthem. The Jags and Ravens made their own gestures in London. This is going to be a very interesting day even before the kickoffs - we’ll see if anyone doesn’t take a knee.

9

I’m glad to see the Steelers do that. Trump is doing God’s work simply by opening his big stupid mouth and ensuring that everybody does the opposite of what he wants.

Pittsburgh will support the Steelers no matter what, and since it’s still a Democratic, pro-union, working-class town, albeit still with some lingering racism that can’t quite be eradicated, it won’t really even be controversial except with a small group of nutters.

10

Look what Kaepernick started, and he still doesn’t have a job!

11

OK, this game has gone straight to plaid. Pittsburgh is stinking the joint up, playing down to the Bears, and the end of the half was about as bizarre as anyone can imagine. Never go full Lett.

17-7 Bears at the half.

12

That was an awful, AWFUL loss. Aside from all the craziness, they couldn’t stop the run all day against a team that couldn’t complete a pass. Bell is still spectacularly mediocre this season. Hey, maybe preseason DOES matter. No super-big contract for you!

I’m upset about the two obvious holding calls in overtime that sprung the big run and then the game-winning run, but they never should have been in that position to begin with so I’m at least pragmatic about it.

Still, the Bears? Dammit. That might have been the easiest on-paper win all year.

13

Nevermind the bullshit, gift fumble that led to the second TD. :rolleyes:

14

That is so kind of them. They could have chosen not to play down to the Bears. They just made the wrong decision.

15

I didn’t think it was a fumble, but the argument was that they called it that way on the field and the replay didn’t show precisely when the ball came out so they didn’t have enough to overturn it. I’d agree it was a bad call, but I understand why it wasn’t changed.

In any case, good on your Bears for their first win. It sucks that it happened at Pittsburgh’s expense, but that’s why they play the games.

They sure did. Obviously you’re a Bears fan and you didn’t like the way I said it, but if the two teams play a hundred times Pittsburgh wins an overwhelming number of them and I think you know that. Why a team whose strength is run defense forgot to prepare for the run I’ll never know.

Anyway, again, congratulations to your boys. It’s back to the drawing board for my Steelers, especially if they do this next week against the Rats, who will be utterly furious about today and fired up but also very tired from the overseas travel. I wonder why they didn’t take the bye week they were offered pre-scheduling. Maybe too early in the season?

16

You don’t think a blue collar town like Pittsburgh won’t be upset that the entire team and looks like the organization disrespected the United States? This will have huge repercussions. Tomlin tried to stay “out” of the fray by ignoring the national anthem. It’s shameful, IMHO. For the first time in my life, I am not upset that the Steelers lost.

17

What’s shameful is the reason for the protests. Tomlin dealt with it exactly right. You’ll note that he came out for it, as did Villanueva. The other players, by staying in, protested without making a big public scene. Their absence was enough without any kneeling, raised fists, etc.

Incidentally, Bubba watching at home doesn’t stand for the anthem. I have never, not once, seen someone stand at home for the anthem. How disrespectful that is.

18

I do know Pittsburgh is much better than the Bears, but I also think that “they played down to their opponent” is a really dumb way of explaining and attempting to understand and cope with an inexplicable loss.

19

It implies they were a bumbling mess. That it was two teams trying their best to botch the game. When in fact, they flat got manhandled. The Bears won in all phases, and held on in spite of a bunch of self-inflicted wounds and some really bad calls.

20

Well, they didn’t win in all phases. They couldn’t throw the ball if their season depended on it. Antonio Brown lit them up. And Pittsburgh had their own self-inflicted wounds, the sack/fumble and the blocked field goal among them. You’ll note that the Bears didn’t score in the second half. That wasn’t an accident of circumstance.