My wife had about 30k of debt ( and no source of income) when I married her.
Marriage is seldom fiscally prudent from all I’ve ever heard.
My spouse and I have been married nearly thirty years. I picked her up at the airport, drove to the marriage commissioner’s office while she changed into a wedding dress. Got married, went home. Total cost about $60.
The big ones will almost certainly skew the results. Also, you need to take into consideration whether or not the poll took the rehearsal dinner into consideration, as this can easily be more expensive than the reception.
My wife and I have probably been to over a dozen weddings that were over 400 to 500 people. We tried to keep ours small, and had around 150 guests. It was a spectacular weekend on the coast, and I’d spend every last dime to do it all over again.
All it cost me was my soul.
Last year I was the Tallest Bridesmaid at my best friend’s wedding (I mulled it over, and neither <i>maid</i> nor <i>matron</i> really apply to me). I don’t know the exact figures, and the cost of the wedding increased partly because some of the in-laws-to-be insisted on donating money to the cause, so they were able to do more neat things.
There were three bridesmaids’ dresses, and three matching ties for the groomsmen, who brought their own suits. Plus the couple bought the groomsmen very nice Italian hats (outdoor wedding + Jewish family). The bride’s dress was in fact cheaper than the bridesmaids’ dresses, since my mom made it and the material was cheap.
Most of the other priceyness arose from having the ceremony in the out-of-the-way mountain town where the bride’s family had had a cabin for three generations. An entire inn was rented for the weekend, catering provided by a local restaurant, “DJ” was a groomsman’s laptop with iTunes and a borrowed sound system. About 80 guests, I would estimate.
I would estimate the total cost to be between 10 and 12K – certainly not 26K, as neither the bride nor the groom wanted to be massively in debt for a single day’s stress.
By way of contrast, my parents were married in a park in clothes handmade by my mother, with rings bought before gold went through the roof. Total cost, including reimbursement for the guy performing the ceremony: about $200.
That seems like a very reasonable price to me. The established wedding videographers around here, for a 2-camera shoot, start around $2000. As a still photographer, I start at $1750, and I’m fairly “affordable” for the market. There’s photographers who start at $5000+ here.
Yes, weddings. We’re planning our wedding party now. We got married in the city office a month ago and we’ve got our wedding in a couple of weeks.
Originally I was hoping for a small dinner of only a few close friends (15 to 20 people total), but my wife wanted more of her friends. We’re up to about 60 to 80 people now. And that’s even with my family not coming over, and only her immediate family coming up from Taiwan.
In Japan, guests give cash at the party. For full-blown events, it can range from US$90 to $270, but for our party, we’re asking $55. (6,000 yen) which just coveres the cost of the buffet, a two-hour open bar and the cake.
Our expenses: We’ve hired a musician for a 20 min stage ($180), her dress and my tux (rented, $700 total) flowers ($250) and then photography. Probably just have friends digital photos.
Too bad Johnny L.A. is too far away or we’d hire him. 
We’re going to just have friends video tape it. We’ve got about three video cams lined up, with have one fixed pointed on the stage area and then the others used as needed. We’ll have tripods and monopods and will ban excess panning – although with an open bar, that rule may not last much.
We’re having a couple of really funny friends as the MCs, we’re using some of our AV equipment so there’s no rental. The restaurant is owned by my friend so we’re getting a break on things and she’s letting us do more than other places.
We didn’t make printed invitations, and are sending the information by email. We’ve already told everyone either in person or by phone, so the email is only for directions.
Our friends are helping with the decorations.
Our biggest expense is flying her family in. That’s about $2,800 for the airfare and hotels.
I had my family and some friends from home send videotaped messages, and then we’ll tape messages from our guests and will play those during the dinner, as well as pics scanned from childhood pictures, our Bali honeymoon, etc.
I think that’s about it. Total cost won’t be bad, especially since guests give money. I’d never do that in the States, but this is the expectation here.
Three cameras is a good idea. We didn’t offer three-camera shoots because we were already the most reasonably-priced studio in town. (And we made the best product too, if I do say so.) And with only four cameras, we could only do two-camera shoots if we were double-booked. But a third camera is good for coverage. We used hand signals to communicate, so that only one camera would be moving at a time. But a third camera, discretely placed, would have been handy for very confined quarters.
Monopods are good when it’s tight, but tripods are better IMO. We’d set up to get the most advantageous angles available. One camera (B-camera) would do coverage, while the other (A-camera) panned. When A-camera was not in motion, B-camera could set up another shot. IMO on-screen zooms don’t look good. So when one camera was zooming we’d use the footage from the other camera. Slow pans look better than fast pans.
Get some shots of the cake, presents, and any other items of interest. Do some close sweeping shots because movement makes it more interesting. We’d use a jib where space permitted for tracking during the ceremony (i.e., when the wedding party is walking down the aisle). It makes it more interesting than just a pan. More ‘swoopy’. For the reception inserts we used hand-held (for the shots of the cake, for example). The dances, garter-toss, boquet toss, etc. were done from a tripod.
Know beforehand if the final product will be full-screen or widescreen and fram accordingly.
In post, be sure to colour-correct every shot. Much of the reception footage will not use the audio, since you’ll be putting music over it; so you can make some shots more dramatic by slowing the footage down slightly (or more). Simple dissolves and fades look better IMO than fancy things like wipes.
Synching the footage from the two (or more) cameras can be tedious sometimes. If you’re not spot-on, it will be noticed. And you don’t have a slate so you can clap the sticks for a positive mark. Actually shooting the wedding and reception are easy. But you have to take your time in post if you want a professional looking product. That’s what made our videos better than the competition. Pard was very, very good at editing. (I’m still learning, myself.)
Good luck, and a happy life!
My parents offered 5K. I took it.
I think from this thread we can tell that no one person has a full perspective on what the average wedding is like. There are just too many variations among regions and social groups.
One thing that hasn’t been brought up is various cultures where weddings are major big-time events that help cement the parents’ place in their social world and involve the whole community. A short Indian wedding last three days, with countless feasts and as many guests as possible- many of whom will be business associates, extended family, etc. that may not have much to do with the people actually being married. Chinese people, Italians, etc. can also really do it up, even if the family is of relatively modest means. Weddings just have different signifigance, and don’t just signify two people joining each other and heading out in the world, but also symbolize the joining of two families and serves as a display of this new alliance’s power within the community.
There are enough of these (especially as people from less conservative cultures choose to live together instead of marry) to drive the average up plenty, I’m sure.
So people are acutally asked directly to give money to defray the cost of the event? Is it written on the invitation or what? Collected at the door? Just currious.
I’m marrying Only Mostly Dead next month and our wedding will come to about $20K. My dad is paying, so he feels the need to invite everyone he’s ever met. If we were planning/paying ourselves, the guest list would be chopped in half (We invited 240 and expect around 200), which would cut almost all costs in half.
even sven, I’m not stalking you, really, but geez you talk a lot of sense!! 
(And I really hate quoting people in their entirety, but this is the second time today that I have needed to do so…with you!!)