The Bastard IHOP From Hell

The BBQ Pit
1

So, the past couple days I’ve had a real craving for some pancakes. As luck would have it, in the annals of the night yesterday, I discover, from poking around http://www.ihop.com, that there’s a friendly local IHOP in my neighborhood. (I haven’t lived here very long. Still figuring out where the hell stuff is.)

So, I head out and walk about a half mile to IHOP.

It’s closed.

What in the fuckity fuck?

All Dopers know that every IHOP in the Universe is open 24/7. I go up to the joint to see if they have any hours posted. They don’t. Hrmmmm.

So this morning I still have a craving. I decide I’ll get pancakes for dinner after work. At work, I call the local IHOP in my neighborhood:

IHOPian: Flushing IHOP, how can I help you?
Friedo: Hey, how late are you open tonight?
IHOPian: We’ll be open until ten.
Friedo: Thanks

“Ten?” I think to myself. “No self respecting IHOP closes at ten. This must be the self loathing kind.”

Anyway, I get to work around 11:00, which means I don’t get out until around 7:30 or so. After a brief stop at home, I again make the half mile journey to the IHOP. I get there at 9:00 on the dot. I open the door, go in.

Different IHOPian: We closed now.
Me: I thought you were open until ten.
IHOPian: No, we closed now sir
Me: The guy on the phone said you were open until ten.
IHOPian: We closed now.

Well, see if I ever eat your narsty pancakes again, bitch. Fuckin IHOP ass-lickers.

:frowning:

2

Look on the bright side…Maybe they got closed by the Health Department and you dodged salmonella or e. coli or something.

3

Actually, I’ve never seen an IHOP that was open 24/7.

4

All the IHOPs I’ve been to in Texas are open 24/7. Unfortunately. The one down the street also serves regular coffee in big pots that say “Decaf” on them, and the manager will act like he’s going to jump on you and kick your ass if you mention it. It bothers me because I would never touch decaf and I turned down a pot of perfectly good coffee because it said that!

5

what strange universe do you live in? ihop, denny’s, house of pies, and biba’s are all open 24/7. if they weren’t, where would we go after rocky?

6

Only one or two of the IHOPs in the Boston area are 24/7. If you want pancakes at 1 AM, you usually have to go to a Bickfords.

7

We used to go to Whataburger(open 24 hrs), because we got kicked out of all the denny’s

8

You’re from Houston, aren’t you?

9

Sheesh. Chain restaurants? Please. Everybody knows that after the bars close you have to go to a diner (and I DO NOT mean Johnny Rocket’s) or truck stop for pancakes, eggs and coffee strong enough to hold down the liquor.

::Shakes head ruefully:: Damn kids!

Zap!

10

I agree with Zappo. Find a local diner. Screw the chain restaurants.

And I rarely see a 24/7 IHOP. I live in lower Westchester County, NY. The only 24/7 restaurants here are Bickford’s and Denny’s.

11

Never seen an IHOP open 24/7, but I’m not sure why any of the 23,000,000 Waffle Houses even have locks on their doors. They never close.

12

My IHOP closes at 3:00 p.m. (and really you don’t want to get there much after 2:00 if you want to get served). But once I learned the rules, it was great. Everyone there knows me and treats me like a valued customer. They even gave me a 15% discount card just because.

Hmmm…pecan pancakes for lunch…

13

All the Denny’s near where I grew up (LA area) close at midnight. WTF?? Do they expect people to go there for the food?

14

I’ve never met a less than 24/7 IHOP. At least not that I noticed.

IHOP was an integral part of my all-nighter routine in college. I’d get off work at 12:30am. Head to IHOP for too much food. By 2am I would head to the 24-hour computer lab on campus and type until the paper was due.

15

I’ve never heard of a 24-hour IHOP either. There is a Carrows nearby that’s open all night on Saturday and Sunday, and that’s about it (besides the always-open Denny’s, of course).

16

Of course, by “Sunday” I really meant “Friday”. It’s a common spelling variation.

17

Obviously, none of y’all (or the Wildest Bill Preferred Spelling, ya’ll) are from the True South. There is only one place for after-drinking carbs and grease, and that is Waffle House. 27% more grease than Denny’s, 45% more flavor than Whataburger, and 76% more attitude from the waitstaff than IHOP.

Say it with me, all y’all True Southern drinkers:
WAFFLE HOUSE!!!

18

You can say that again.

Come to think of it…