The BBC's plans for announcement of nuclear war

Very interesting article about what the BBC would have announced in the event of a nuclear war.

I’m not sure this very vague announcement would have done much to calm me in the event of a nuclear war. The only real advice given is not to use toilets assuming you still had working plumbing.

I’ve seen Threads and I think that movie depicted nuclear war more accurately.

You actually read it, and that’s what you got?

“Here are the main points again: Stay in your own homes, and if you live in an area where a fall-out warning has been given stay in your fall-out room, until you are told it is safe to come out. The message that the immediate danger has passed will be given by the sirens and repeated on this wavelength. Make sure that the gas and all fuel supplies are turned off and that all fires are extinguished. Water must be rationed, and used only for essential drinking and cooking purposes. It must not be used for flushing lavatories. Ration your food supply: it may have to last for 14 days or more.”

What’s vague about that? It’s all real advice, and it’s all good advice.

I probably shouldn’t have used the word vague. I would have liked to see specific advice about not trying to go to a hospital , don’t try to go to a large city nor flee from one, and that anyone observed looting would be shot on sight, no questions asked.

Zombie and disaster porn films probably weren’t as mainstream as they are now, so such considerations probably weren’t on the mind of the writers.

This is the initial warning. I’m certain that there would be more information to come, assuming that there was still a place to broadcast from.

“Professor, would you say our viewers should crack each others heads open and feast upon the goo inside?”

“Yes I would, Kent.”

It’s just gone 8 o’clock and time for the thermonuclear penguin on top of your television set to explode.

I don’t think the British would be too impressed by the ‘All Looters Shot On Sight’ suggestion.

They’d be expected to form an orderly queue outside any wrecked establishment, and leave the money on the counter.

Another British response to “what to do in case of nuclear attack?”: “Some people in this great country of ours can run a mile in 4 minutes…”

Beyond the Fringe, 1964,

SS squads will be patrolling to enforce regulations.

“These unfortunate people here will be instantly killed. This circle, which I am sad to say we are in, will experience a slower, considerably more painful death.”

Wonder what the SOP is today? An SMS saying “Putin’s has gone insane, RUN!!!”?

Or something similar?

I would like to see the comparable announcement for the US public. Surely there’ll be provisions for people to continue shopping!

"I’m going to keep using my boat, and I hope the rest of America will prudently recreate. "

I think the words “Stay in your own home” are a bit of a clue. And at the time of drafting the statement, probably a majority of people were well aware of similar advice that had actually been published in 1940 about the possibility of invasion, so this would not have been that unfamiliar.

Whether in a nuclear attack any of that would have been realistic anywhere in this country outside the more remote rural highland areas is another matter, of course, but no-one would find out unless it actually were to happen.

In related news, the Twitter feed for Khloe Kardashian has been disabled for the moment. The President urges the country not to panic.

The GOP, in its response, disagreed with the President and called for investigations.

Hillary Clinton has blamed the nukes on a Facebook video. Bernie Sanders has called for raising taxes on the 1% and using the funding to provide free education for radioactive zombies. Donald Trump has decided on building bomb-proof domes over every casino in Atlantic City and making Putin pay for it.

Bulletins as they happen.


Remain indoors.

“If you are hearing this broadcast, two things are sure - you have survived the initial blast; and you are highly unlikely to be as fortunate concerning the fallout. Carry on!”

“Close your eyes and think of England. We don’t recommend ever opening them again.”

Or better still,“Put your head between your legs, and kiss your arse goodbye”.