The Best Way To Skin A Cat

At least in Japan up until fairly recently (AFAIK it may still be happening), the “shamisen”, an indigenous three-stringed instrument, used to use cat skin as its cover.

Imagine a squarish-looking banjo with three strings (plucked with what looks like a bamboo rice paddle). You know that front part of the banjo where there’s a taut covering that provides the unique banjo sound? The more expensive shamisens used to use the front skin of a cat, dried and stretched, over the front of the instrument.

A Web page, “Shammy’s Page Kawa,” states the following (keep in mind this is a native Japanese speaker whose English language translation probably went through a couple of morphs at Babelfish)… [Hey ReservoirDog, I don’t think YOU’re safe, either!!] specifically about the skins:

Cat’s skin
Shamisen with cat’s skin is real Japanese traditional style.
A cat can make only one Shamisen. Use stomach side. And that price become expensive.

Dog’s skin
Can make a couple Shamisens sikins a dog. Because to use back side of dogs.
Sound of these skin’s Shamisen is stronger more than cat’s one. And to be bad sound is soon.
But nowaday, concerthalls, mics, became real good. At the some place and situation dog skin’s sound is better.

Plastic.
Many Shamisen’s users wanted and riquested taffer, easy keeping skins.
At last, 1980’s kind of plastics skins were released. These kind of skins are not break easy. But we had never thought
another broblem that is very easy got damage about hot temperature.
Of cource, sound is no good.
Most Shamisen players don’t want it, and cost is more expenssive than another kind of skins.


BTW shamisen makers, if they use plastic to make a cheap one, will often paint two small nipples on the front of the instrument, to give the illusion of cat skin!!! NO LIE!

My ex-husband does. It’s one of the most disgusting things I’ve ever seen (I couldn’t sit through the whole thing). The poor, dumb, putz thinks the tape is the real deal, too. Sad very sad.

Was the alien skinned in the process?

sigh

You sick bastards.

You have it all wrong! You freeze the cat, once it is soldi, you dip it in boiling water, holding by the tail, (cut its head off first) and it will slide right out.

God you people couldnt even open corn on the cob without help :rolleyes:

Huh? I’m sorry what was that? My gremlins?

…I dont get it…

Can anyone help me out here?

Discovered another one:

Place cat in pressure cooker. Increase heat and pressure slowly. Then, release pressure suddenly. Cat should explode like a potato, leaving behind a mostly-intact skin.

:rolleyes:

Jam a stick up its ass then peel it like a bannana.

Hold (and rotate) over open flame until charred. Rinse in cool water. The skin should just flake off.

[Homer]Mmmmmmm… flakey cat[/Homer]

One word: Pirahnas!