I’d read Dr. Seuss to you each night as you grew in your mommy’s tummy.
We would lay in bed at night and wonder who you would be. Would you look like your father? Have your mother’s laugh? I’d whisper secrets to you, man to soon boy, father to son, and we’d plot to outnumber your mom.
Each day more exciting than the previous. Each tomorrow brighter than each today.
For you were to be my long-hoped for child. The son I never dared to dream of. A wonderful surprise for a man, grown almost too old.
Those were happy days of wonder and love.
And you came, each precious moment a new joy and then you went. The toys went un-played, the new balls gathered dust.
Birthdays are for the living. Candles, for those who laugh.
We lit four candles on a chocolate cake and opened your presents. You dwell in our hearts and you laugh within our souls.
Four years, has it been that long? Fear not, my son, for you will not be forgotten.
Ian Pough. I bring you back today to a place that was home. You were gone in a blink, but your story was told and here will be friends who remember our brave little fighter.
Rest peacefully, my little one.
I can’t believe this was four years ago.
Best to you.
Has it been four years already?
Much love to your family, ToykoPlayer.
Four years already? Wow. I love reading your posts about your children, TokyoPlayer - the love you have for them just shines through and it’s so beautiful.
Though I made the mistake of reading this on my laptop at school and I’m trying not to cry in public!
Much love to you and your family!
That was beautiful, ToykoPlayer.
Much love to you and yours.
Four years already gone by? My God. Rest easy, little Ian Pough. You weren’t here long but you had an impact deeper and further than you know.
All my best to you and yours, TokyoPlayer.
I think of Ian Pough every time I hear a baby-related announcement. Your family is in my thoughts, always.
Ian Pough has extended family all over the world. Thanks to your writings, we’ve been allowed to love him and cherish his memory.
Thank you, TokyoPlayer, for continuing to share him with us.
TokyoPlayer, somehow in the chaos and changes of my own life, I let you and your family slip from my memory. Thank you for reminding me of what an inspiration you are. When I think, “How would I like to be a father?” you are one of the first to come to mind.
I’m reading about this for the first time, and already feel an affinity with you simply because of your screen name. I’m so so sorry. I never met him, but I’ll remember him with you.
My warm thanks to those who kindly remember our son. For some reason it’s been important for me that others would know about Pough-chan.
His stay was so brief, but it changed our lives, which I like to I hope was for the better.
I never knew how strong a feeling could be. The intensity of the love. Someone wrote in one of the treads that when her baby was born, she whispered that she would die for her child. Really, what parent wouldn’t?
Nature does such a damn good job of programming us to be parents by forming bonds with our offspring. (Now if she had only not forgotten to include that instruction book, it would have made the specifics a little easier.)
I’ve never hurt so much in my life, and this time of the year is still hard. I suspect there will be bittersweet memories for years to come.
We keep pictures of Ian around the house. Beta-chan knows his name, but at almost two, there isn’t a deep understanding. We had a birthday party, and she thought it was great fun. She wanted to claim the toys, but was fine that they went up with the others by his picture.
She told Amma, her Taiwanese grandma who just came today that “older brother had a birthday.”
Speaking of which, Anya is doing great.
I’ve got some other family news to post, so I’ll do another update soon and include more about Anya.
Thanks again so much to everyone here. You were such a source of comfort at such a terribly difficult time for me. I never knew that so many people would care about something happening so far away.
Take care, TokyoPlayer. Ian’s story touched my heart. I can’t believe it’s been that long ago.
All the best to you and your family. How can four years have passed so quickly? There are a lot of us around here who carry Ian’s memory in our hearts.
Glad to hear Anya is doing so well; I’m looking forward to your update.
We have not forgotten Ian Pough. You and your family are in our hearts. Thank you for sharing Ian and Anya with us.
I remember Ian Pough, and his short life touched my heart.
As for Anya- well, from sticky thoughts to crying with happiness reading your post on the day of her birth, she too has a special place in my heart.
As always TokyoPlayer, your family are in my prayers.
Happy Birthday little guy, you are not forgotten… Looking foreward to your update **TokyoPlayer ** ! hugs take care, be well, and kiss your Daughter for me!
When I read Ian Pough’s story 4 years ago I wept like a child for your pain.
Now, four years later, I’m weeping again for your love and the love his short time on Earth brought forth.
My best to you and your family in all things.
Despite lurking for years before actually joining, I’d never actually heard the story of Ian Pough. I looked up the thread last night, and had to excuse myself to the bathroom so that my mom wouldn’t see me crying. It was heartbreaking, sad, and completely unfair. But it was also inspiring, the way you and your family rallied around him, letting him spend his final moments among those who loved him. Nothing can top that.
Beautiful post. Your daughter may not get it now, but she will.