Alternate- Annette Funicello
Hey!
Some of you are peeking at my top secret DP2005 notes. I see a few of my picks here.
I had my best year last time with a political theme, so:
Gerald Ford
Mikhail Gorbachev
Pope John Paul II
Kim Jong-il
Henry Kissinger
George McGovern
Hosni Mubarak
Pervez Musharraf
Prince Phillip
Augusto Pinochet
Prince Rainier III
Margaret Thatcher
Boris Yeltsin
I’m wooooneweeey. Soooo Wooooneweeeey…
I’ve been lurking for days here, watching others post, making my own evil list, checking it twice, running the odds…but I must say Kim Jong-il is my favorite dark-horse candidate to date. If Team America doesn’t get him one of his own might.
And to those of you who picked Mary-Kate: shame on you. (Even though anorexia is like 40% mortality over 5 years and she’s worth tons of points… :eek: ) McCauley is another morbid but potentially high-yield bet. Either one of those two is worth 3 PJPII’s. So much to think about…
Well folks, you’re in luck. I’m heading up North for the New Year, to a cabin where even the most determined drunk driver would have a tough time taking me out. So here goes the much ballyhooed NurseCarmen Death-O-Matic[sup]TM[/sup]
death list for 2005.
From my childhood:
1.** Nurse Carmen.**
[ul]Not that NurseCarmen silly! No, my beloved namesake, local childhood celeb Ms. Mary Davies Orfield. As much as it pains me, I aint getting’ any younger, and neither is the original nurse, at 78.[/ul]
2.** Jan Michael Vincent.**
[ul]Who on earth watched Airwolf you ask? Folks who were 14 in 1982, that’s who. And that’s me. That young chisled good looking star of the show was the idylic of all what I wanted to become. Sadly, I’ve come pretty close. Jan is now world famous for his alcohol consumtion. upon review, GWVet has already brought up JMV, good job! [/ul]
The Tall:
3.** Matthew McGrory.**
[ul]Giant from the movie Big Fish. There is one way that people who suffer from Giantism stop growing. This is how.[/ul]
The Geralds:
4.** Jerry Maren (Gerald Marenghi).**
[ul]Who knew this Wizard of Oz munchkin was still alive and kicking? He’s off to meet the rest of the lollypop league.[/ul]
5.** Geraldine Ferraro.**
[ul]Diagnosed with multiple myeloma in 1998, she’s already bucking the 5 year average survival rate. Even in death, she’s better suited to be president than someone I won’t mention.[/ul]
The Skinny:
6.** Allegra Beck Versace.**
[ul]You can never be too rich, but you can be too thin, as this Versace heiress is dying to prove. [/ul]
The rest: That’s it folks, no more earth shattering picks, lotta build up for nothin, huh?
7.** Justice Rhenquist.**
[ul]Gotta get me some easy points.[/ul]
8.** Liz Taylor.**
[ul]She makes it easy by telling the press just how messed up she is, conveniently at dead pool picking time.[/ul]
9.** Scotty. (James Doohan)**
[ul]Looking rough. Looking worse than Captain Pike did just before he left for Talos IV.[/ul]
10.** Annette Funicello.**
[ul]And I thought this pick would be a coup. You people are too good.[/ul]
11.** Dick Clark.**
[ul]It’s looking like the next ball Dick sees dropping will be the one that shows oxygen flow next to his hospital bed.[/ul]
6.** Stephen Hawking.**
[ul]Speaking of Captain Pike…[/ul]
6.** Charlton Heston.**
[ul]Hawking and Heston, my two carry overs from last year. Don’t make me scream “Damn you all to hellllll” to the skies Chuck.[/ul]
Alternate.** Billy Graham.**
[ul]I don’t have a strong feel for this one, just hoping to make the world a better place.[/ul]
A well-rounded list, if a bit weighted to the entertaiment industry.
I would like to make a substitution:
please replace my number 11 pick, J.D. Salinger, with Karla Homolka (horrid Canadian serial killer.)
Interestingly, Karla’s full prison sentence expires on July 6, 2005.
Please consider my picks as numbered 12 for Stephen Hawking, and 666 for Heston. Oops. I mean 13.
and replace “embodiment” for the made up word “idylic”.
Time to stop agonizing and post. 13, right?
[ul][li]Mary Kate Olsen - I was going to say “an Olsen twin” but that probably wouldn’t be allowed. Crank binge Note to self: excellent band name[/li][li]Queen Elizabeth - Corgi mauling[/li][li]Horatio Saanz - John Belushi curse He really doesn’t have a choice. [/li][li]Burt Reynolds - Toupee fire[/li][li]Chris Rock - Beaten to death by cracker ass crackers who lack sense of humor[/li][li]Dick Clark - Crushed by Times Square new year’s ball[/li][li]Eric Idle - Crushed by 16 ton weight[/li][li]VP Dick Cheney - Ventilation failure in batcave[/li][li]Pope John Paul II - Stroke during Easer mass, not diagnosed until Pentecost[/li][li]David Letterman - Stupid pet trick gone horribly awry[/li][li]Teller - One of Gilette’s tricks gone pretty much as everyone expects[/li][li]Bruce Willis - Will go untreated for an auto accident and bleed to death because everyone assumes he’s just in makeup[/li][li]Leapy Lee - Impled by numerous little arrows[/li][/ul]
Well, that was worth the wait, Nurse. More a work of art than a death list.
I doubt anyone outside of the cities knows who Nurse Carmen is, but hey.
And as for…
6. Allegra Beck Versace.
Good gawd! I’m not going to steal your pick, but man does she look bad!
Steal away. My alcohol consumption on New Years Eve means everyone benefits!
Here we go again…
2005 picks:
James Doohan
Dan Fogleberg
Bob Newhart
Chief Justice Rehnquist
Gerald Ford
Barbara Bel Geddes
Art Linkletter
Dick Clark
Michael Jackson (the pop star, not the talk show host)
Gordon Hinckley (President, LDS Church)
Elizabeth Taylor
Eminem (Marshall Mathers)
Pope John Paul II
First timer here. What the hell.
My wildcards:
Actor Macauley Culkin
Actress Doris Day
Former First Lady Rosalind Carter
Well, good heavens. Hope she makes it through the weekend.
Gary Busey
Richard Pryor
Nancy Reagan
Pope John Paul II
Elizabeth Taylor
Michael Jackson
Martha Stewart
Fidel Castro
Courtney Love
Howard Stern
Abe Vigoda
Paul Newman
Ricardo Mantalban
Meatloaf
Ringo Starr
Pope John Paul 2
Keith Richards
Gerald Ford
Sharon Osbourne
Yogi Berra
Phyllis Dilller
Zsa Zsa Gabor
Ed McMahon
Pete Rose
Charles Manson
JD Salinger
I am far to lazy to search through this thread, but WHAT I WANT TO KNOW IS: Captain Lance Murdoch AKA as the Angel of Death have you posted your picks yet?
Also, is anyone else having a hard time deciding just 13 people who will expire this year? The agonizing is agonizing.
I thought fleetingly about running an Alternate Dead Pool List. Called " The Bridesmaid List" for a larger number (20 or so) so that we can all go into a frenzy over picking and have higher scores and get everyone into a necro-lather. It’s like crack, admit it. But, I would have no idea of even how to organize something like this. I mean I can’t get my VCR to stop flashing 12, let alone figure out how to do somethign like this on my computer. I am retarded. Yay me!
