NO! NO! NO!
I don’t care how much you engineer your Mutant Potatoes, it’s elves!
ELVES FOR SHOES!
Don’t make me stop this car!
Your cross-dressing veggies can’t make shoes.
But, I concede, they can make home fries.
Good ones.
Serve them with the Elves A’la Orange.
Just 'cause ya asked, and all.
Actually, I feel like I need to keep with a doggie theme, so I might actually include 2 anecdotes. It must be half priced anecdote here today at Chez Scout. (actually, since I’m posting from work, it’s technically not chez scout, but you really needn’t bother yourself with the fact that I may be posting in bunny slippers or a business suit)
The doggie anecdote -
I had an English Springer Spaniel when I was growing up. I named him Dolittle. As in Dr. Dolittle, which I had been reading at school. He was purebred, and so had some official name like Dolittle Von Scout (substitute my real last name for Scout, which begins with a D and hence has some aliterative qualities).
Anyway, he wasn’t the brightest of dogs. Turned out that he had epilepsy, which I guess is common in purebreds due to inbreeding. (correct me if I’m wrong) So he was on phenobarbitol 3 times a day, which we fed to him in pieces of cut up hot dogs. Unfortunately the medicine knocked him out good. He laid around and slept mostly, until the medicine wasn’t enough to stop his seizures. We had to put him to sleep eventually.
Oh, and lest I end on a sad note, he was quirky in that since he was a supposed “water dog” who was supposedly used for pheasant hunting “back in the day”, it was amusing that he hated water. My dad tried to get him to run into the water to fetch sticks. It NEVER worked. He needed to be dragged into the water. The dog, not my dad.
The non-doggie anecdote -
I went and saw Mulholland Drive this weekend with my man. It’s a David Lynch movie, and if you’ve seen any of his stuff, you can imagine that it was… odd to say the least. On the plus side, for those of you so inclined, there are a few scenes in which two women smooch and touch each other a bit. Purely for artistic effect, I’m sure.
Anyway, after the movie we went out to dinner. Stickboy had calzone, and I had tequila chicken pasta. It was delightful going down, but I didn’t tolerate it too well the next day. Enough said. I’ll save the rest for one of the obligatory TMI threads that for some reason I always feel the need to post to.
Okay, well it’s almost lunchtime, so I’m going to head down to the cafeteria and see what this whole “green bean ragout” is all about that they’re serving today. Not sure what it is, but since it’s the Heart Healthy Entree, I may end up getting it.
I like frisbee dog shows for dog watching. Lots of good friendly, athletic type dogs there.
We had a Basenji named Jeh-jeh before we moved overseas. Basenjis are very strange dogs. Ours didn’t yodel too often. We adopted her from a breeder when she was about 1 year old. The breeder lives on a farm somewhere up between Dayton and Indiana. The breeder also had a couple of Chows. She let four Basenjis out with the Chows and it was like watching the raptors in Jurassic park picking off the humans. One Basenji would get a Chows attention, then two others would flank it and a last one would come in from behind. Since they don’t bark it wasn’t clear how they communicated, but they managed to subdue the much larger animal in no time by working as a team. The Chow beat a hasty retreat.
Our Jeh-jeh wasn’t show quality but had a very nice personality. Except that she wanted to fight every other dog around her. Without her brothers and sisters she didn’t stand a chance. She was good with the kids but would occasionaly challenge me for superiority of the pack. When she did that I would bite her on the neck and pin her to the ground to show dominance. I am the alpha in our house; I hope I never have to prove it to Mrs. ShibbOleth or the Olethlings[sup]TM[/sup].
:rolleyes;
Dogs are no better at making shoes than potatoes are.
It’s elves.
So Rue… (Now that I know a dog groomer I can pester about all I need to know.)
You know how long haired dogs get hair in their eyes and then they start running (the eyes, not the dogs) and the eyegoop discolors the fur under the eyes? How do I get rid of the discoloration in time for the dog show? I wipe his eye area every morning with a soft wet cloth, but that doesn’t do the trick. Any advice?
But Bosda:
Elves has just left the building.
[sub]Well you can do anything but stay off of my blue swede shoes[/sub]
Soda, I couldn’t remember Sigge’s breed. I had to go look it up. The Coton de Tulear isn’t AKC, but he’s a dog and some things are safe to generalize. The eye boogers, they just build up and get gunky? No problems. (Of course if it’s yellow discharge it can be bad and you have to see your vet. But you knew that.) You can buy a commercial paste to clean the mess, or your can mix your own. (Equal parts Milk of Magnesia, cornstarch and hydrogen peroxide.) After you pick the gunk out of the corners of the eye (for best results, use your fingers. Yay!), slap some of the paste on the stain and wait for it to dry and then pick it out. (If you just buy some commercial stuff read the label. Duh.) For day to day gunk, a little cornstarch will dry the eye boogers up and keep them from staining (so bad).
You can also use ground up Rolaids. The white ones, not the colored/flavored ones.
If you weren’t going to show him and you didn’t have to keep all the fluffy hair, I’d say chop the mess out. If there’s no hair in the corners of the eye, there’s no hair to catch the eye boogers and stain. Quick and easy and unfortunately not a great option. (If you’re pretty sure he’s going to tank the show and you just want the practice, chop the gunk out and try to keep his eyes clean as the hair grows back.) Treat daily with cornstarch and hope for the best.
Before you show, a little powder will help bring out the white. (If it’s not cheating. I don’t know the rules where you show. FCI?) And a Blue Shampoo (marketed for white dogs) helps pop the white. I like BioGroom. I don’t know if you can get it. It’s hard enough to find around here. (US.) (BioGroom is the company that makes a full line of shampoos, not the name of the blue stuff.) (Ask for it by name!)
Sigge wouldn’t happen to have a little color in his face anyway? White hair stains worse than hair with some color. (Of course.)
You can also take some of the hair out with thinning shears. (Grooming scissors with a normal blade on one side and teeth on the other.) This takes out some of the hair and some of the stain along with it, but leaves some of the hair so it’s still fluffy. It also keeps his face from looking “chopped”.
I hope some of that helps.
Shibb, I am lobbying my sister to get a Basenji when she needs a replacement dog. They are so cool. Nice and tidy. Since she won’t need to replace either of her dogs anytime soon, I should have a shot at swaying her decision.
I’m also lobbying The Little Woman to let me get a Newfoundland. Since Lucy’s pushing 3, with a constant barrage of whining I just may bring her around to my way of thinking by the time we need a replacement dog. (The Irish Wolfhound is completely out of the picture. Maybe my brother…)
-Rue.
Would those be Soda’s blue shoes Shibb? (Bwa-hahahahaha! I crack me up.)
-Rue.
I don’t have any blue shoes. Unless you count my sneakers, but they’re blue/white/grey, mostly white.
Well, now. Thanks for your answer. (And e-mail. Your name is Ken? Who knew? That surprised me almost as much as learning UncleBeer’s name is Bob. Bob. Think about it.)
Sigge’s face is all white. AFAIK, it’s okay to trim a little, but the ideal is long bangs. I’ve tried trimming his eye area, but he won’t keep still, and I’m terrified I’ll poke his eye out.
Hydrogen peroxide? That sounds scary! What if he gets some in the eye? That wouldn’t be good now would it? Maybe I should just go to a pet store and see if they have anything I can use. Or just leave it, and see what happens. It’s only a puppy show, it’s not official or anything, so I’m only going to see if he’s got potential. If he doesn’t (but I guess I have to wait until he’s an adult to know for sure) I will trim him down. I plan to do agility with him, and if he’s not dog show material, he might as well have short fur.
I guess I’ll cut some of it off and hope for the best.
UncleBeer is a Bob? Bob’s your Uncle (Beer)? Creepy.
Not that UncleBeer is creepy. Not at all.
Soda, if you’re going to trim Sigge’s (See how I embolden that? Like he’s a real Doper.) eye hair, I’d suggest you use a thinning shear. (Oster makes a decent one for not too much money. At least here. There, I don’t know.) Have the little guy stand on a towel (or non-skid mat, like a place mat) on a table, facing the same way you are. Grab his snout (oh yeah baby, he’ll love this) and trim the hair with the points of the shears pointing down. Less likely you’ll poke him.
I like thinning shears for this because they don’t cut so much hair in one pass (you can feather out the trim) and they pinch rather than cut if Sigge zigs when you think he’s going to zag.
If you just want the hair gone, clippers are the way to go. Over the eye (he’ll close it, trust me) towards the nose, not the other way.
The hydrogen peroxide is in the paste, so you won’t get it in his eye. (I don’t use any of this. Since I don’t groom show dogs, I just chop out anything I don’t like.)
I guess this could have been e-mail, but now everyone knows how to deal with doggy eye boogers. A service to Dopers (and lurkers I guess) everywhere.
Oh, and Bosda, Leprechauns* make shoes. Maybe even blue suede shoes. Elves are just in marketing.
-Rue.