Ooh, Gartog, you charmer, you! I’m glad you like my accent. I love it too. :0) I’m sure if I heard you speak with your British accent, I’d love it too. [giggle] So it’s my choice for the dance, huh? Well, I like ballroom dancing, but the fella’s supposed to choose the dance and lead it. So I’ll leave that choice with you because I do want to eventually ballroom dance with you. However, since I get the first choice, I think for the first dance I want to do the slow drag. So why don’t you hold me close, hum some music in my ear, keep me warm and safe from all those Underpants beetles [shudder] roaming around here, and let’s slow drag, Sugar.
One moment celestina.
Gartog swaps the CD currently playing for Tremonisha And as the lights dim leads celestina to the dance floor. As they touch he feels something, it starts in his stomach, like butterflies flitting through his gastronomic juices, and shivers through the rest of his body.
The rest of the world is hidden in darkness from the couple on the dance floor. As they dance they are caressed by the fingers of moonlight, which penetrate the darkness.
Gartog salutes celestina, looking deep in to her eyes, he whispers something to her. “You look beautiful this evening, like a goddess”
Pulling her closer they begin to dance to the music, crushing Underpants beetles underfoot.
- The rest of the world dissolves around us as I look in to your eyes a faint smile crosses my lips. The steps come naturally, subconsciously almost, until the only thing I am aware of is you. We move as one across the dance floor the connection between us feels almost magnetic. I pull your body closer to mine, feel the heat radiating from within and am sure I feel the same to you. The music stops and I hold you still, only for a moment but every second feels like an eternity*
[/quote]
Walk slowly, talk lowly,
Listen to that rag.
Hop and skip,
Now do that Slow Drag.
::thud::
Hey, if you want something HARD…
Cougarfang and Gartog… thanks, guys! Those bushes were sticking me in all the wrong places. I mean, I know I have a stick up my butt, but that was ridiculous.
Hmmm… maybe if I zip on over to the bar and get all lubed up, I won’t, uh, creak so much. Heh.
Dougie_monty has been quietly sipping coffee or ice water, and hasn’t spoken much. He sat in a chair shortly after he arrived and pretty much stayed there. But Creaky’s comment was hard to resist.
So he set his cup down and sauntered over to Creaky. He tiptoed behind Creaky, grabbed the stick and yanked it out full force. Creaky shrieked with pain, but at worst he probably got scraped in the outer part of the anus by his undershorts.
He turned around to face Dougie–who is 6’2", and simply growled, “Why the hell did you pull that thing out? Can’t you mind your own damn business?”
Dougie said, “Hey, it looked like you accidentally sat on that thing! I didn’t break the skin, did I?”
Creaky glowered and grabbed Dougie’s lapels. “Well, let’s just see about that!” He took out a flashlight and hustled dougie over to the bathroom, where he took his pants down and said, “You take that flashlight and look! If you drew blood I’m going to sue you!”
Dougie, not relishing this kind of inspection, gingerly scrutinized this part of Creaky’s anatomy with the flashlight. “All I see are scrape marks, no blood.” Then Creaky heard a click and saw a flash of light.
“What the hell was that?” he damanded.
“That was a Polaroid camera,” dougie answered. He waited until the picture developed, and showed it to Creaky.
“See? Just scrape marks, no blood,” said dougie.
“You’re lucky!” growled Creaky as he threw the snapshot to the floor, pulled his pants up, and left the bathroom. Dougie shrugged and left the bathroom with his camera. He returned to his chair and coffee and spent the rest of his time there trying to make passes at unescorted women.
Pssst… Dougie, I think that Creaky is a woman. On the upside, it will make selling those polaroids more practical. I’ll give you $5 for the whole lot.
dougie…
Your last post, my friend, was like two minutes in a Frank Zappa song. Loverly, just loverly.
But dude… did you know that I was a girl? 'Course, the scene works well either way… 
Hey, fellas!.. those Polaroids are worth at least fifteen bucks! Uh, right?
Right?
Buncha chiselers.
::digging in pockets::
I’ve got…ummm…seven dollars and forty-three cents, half a roll of life savers, and…umm…what the heck is that!?!
Oooh! Do you have popsicles too? I could really go for a popsicle…
quote:
Gartog swaps the CD currently playing for Tremonisha And as the lights dim leads celestina to the dance floor. As they touch he feels something, it starts in his stomach, like butterflies flitting through his gastronomic juices, and shivers through the rest of his body.
In wordless concert, celestina’s body also shivers in anticipation of the dance to come.
quote:
The rest of the world is hidden in darkness from the couple on the dance floor. As they dance they are caressed by the fingers of moonlight, which penetrate the darkness.
Gartog salutes celestina, looking deep in to her eyes, he whispers something to her. “You look beautiful this evening, like a goddess”
At Gartog’s words, celestina blushes and smiles. “And YOU are a beautiful man, Gartog,” she states, snuggling a little closer to the warmth of his body. Her hands of their own volition caress his back.
quote:
Pulling her closer they begin to dance to the music, crushing Underpants beetles underfoot.
The rest of the world dissolves around us as I look in to your eyes a faint smile crosses my lips. The steps come naturally, subconsciously almost, until the only thing I am aware of is you. We move as one across the dance floor the connection between us feels almost magnetic. I pull your body closer to mine, feel the heat radiating from within and am sure I feel the same to you. The music stops and I hold you still, only for a moment but every second feels like an eternity
celestina, wrapped in warmth and safety, never hears the sound of bugs being crushed or the music stop. She’s just concentrating on the man holding her, feeling herself being drawn closer and closer and loving every minute of it. 
She reaches up and taking her time about it gives Gartog a warm, wet, long kiss. Neither of them wants the dancing to end, and as luck would have it another slow song starts. Liplocked and getting more heated, celestina and Gartog start moving again.
When they come up for air, celestina whispers in his ear: “Gartog, this is WONDERFUL dancing with you! You’ve got quite a way with words, Sugar, and I’ll have you know you’ve got me all hot and bothered here. You better watch it, or before you know it you’re going to have me trying to snap you up for virtual hubby #3. That is, if you’re willing. But we can talk about that later. For now, just keep on dancing with me.”
Ssshhh! Of course they’re worth more than $5, I’m trying to get in at the bottom of the market. Perhaps Rue has a camera we can borrow and a spare bedroom where we can work up something a bit more “artistic”?
Oooh! Goody! Art! I love making art! It’s so, uh, intellectual !
Um, is this for theatrical release or straight-to-video?
(zoogirl strolls in, carrying a bottle of iced-tea and a bag of chips. She stumbles over a stick with, well, SOMEthing on one end and spots Rue)
Hi, Rue! I brought something for the munchie table. Wow, great party! Hey, Bobkitty looks sort of, um, cold. Oh!(catchs sight of Gartog and celestina) My goodness! They look kind of HOT! That’s a pretty good CD player you’ve got, but you know what this party needs? A band! Now it just so happens Mr.zoogirl has been playing with a bunch of guys for, oh, about the last seventeen years. I bet if I give him a call, he could round 'em up and be here in, say an hour? What? Oh, well mostly oldies-you know, real get up and dance 'til ya drop music. They play some new stuff too. Sure, they’ll take requests!
What the heck?! (notices beetles heading in the direction of the bedrooms) Oh, man! Underwear Beetles! I’m glad I wore these tight jeans instead of a skirt! Hey, ya want me to ask Mr.zoogirl to bring along a couple frogs and the lizard? That’ll fix the little buggers!
bobkitty and Supe, what do you think you’re doing? I can see what you’re doing, but can you take it over to the corner? People are trying to eat here. (And the Bourbon Dogs are ready!)
We could throw a tarp over you for privacy.
If celestina and Gatog keep “dancing” like that, we’ll have to throw a tarp over them too. And I only have so many tarps.
Creaky, do you need some unguent? (That’s “salve”, not a hoofed animal. That would be “ungulate”) The cam-corder is around somewhere. Knock yourself out. (But don’t really get knocked out. Unless you sign a waiver of liability. And it should be in a real funny way.) Have you seen the selection of bodu paints T.Bunny brought?
zoogirl, go ahead and call the Mr. The more the merrier. And have him bring his own livestock. We already have T’Other’N’s burro, and Lucy the Wonder Dog chasing free range chickens all over the house. What are a few frogs and lizards? All these beetles underfoot, it’s like walking on potato chips.
-Rue.
Creaky, just go down the hall to that last bedroom on the left. I need to find a few props to make this more believable.
Now where did they park that donkey? Or is Superdude still here in case I need a stand-in?
Popsicles aplenty. Just follow me over to the corner so that we don’t interrupt the festivities…
::bobkitty follows Superdude over to the corner::
So… whatcha got? Cherry? Grape? And it’s those single popsicles, right? The double ones always wind up being too big, and they melt before I get finished with them, and just make a big old mess. We could split a double if that’s all you’ve got…
… so then the Zulu warrior turns to Nancy Reagan and says “Oh, about a foot and a half, is that big enough for you?” Well, you can imagine the uproar. The whole place just fell on the floor laughing. I think that the Pope acutally peed in his pants. You should have been there.
Don’t look now, but do you see that couple over there on the dance floor…no, not the two dwarfs, the other two…yeah, them. I bet she doesn’t know that he’s eunuch. Hmmm? I don’t really know. I hear he had some terrible accident involving a Gingsu and an electric pencil sharpener. Can you imagine? I also hear he had three to begin with…how strange is that?
Say, do you actually know any of these people? Me, neither. I was just driving by and saw someone laying in the bushes and figured that was the place to be. Want to go catch a buzz? I hear the prices of hash are about to go through the rough. One of those unintended consequences of the war on terrorism.