Stalin did the same to messengers of bad news.
Andy Borowitz has this covered … 
“The American economy added a million new jobs in May and a billion new jobs in June,” Santos declared. “President Trump is creating jobs like crazy—he even gave one to Pete Hegseth.”
The unprecedented job growth has boosted Trump’s approval rating, which Santos said currently stands at 140 percent.
140%? Trump’s not going to like that, he saved 1500% on drugs, so his approval rating should be at least 1600%. Rookie mistake, that.
I just realized there has to be a 1600 Percentsylvania Avenue joke in there somewhere.
I am surprised he hasn’t “promoted” the address to 1700 Pennsylvania Ave.
“45-47 Pennsylvania Avenue”
Think bigger. Why should it be Pennsylvania Avenue? It should be Trump Avenue.
Don’t give them any ideas. I can imagine someone proposing exactly that.
Apologies to Dr. Suess, but someone should write a book about him titled On Beyond Parody.
…in Trumpington, D.T., in the Trumped-Up States of America.
A hyphenated house number would be oddly apt for our first president from Queens…
On that glorious day, when all the trumpicoronation signs and labels get torn down like confederate statues. Bolt ya nugget.
Safety advantages of mRNA are discussed here:
I cannot think of no one as unqualified as this suggestion
And yes, I know it is supposedly satire….
… but is it?
Trump’s DoJ has opened an investigation into New York Attorney General Letitia James, related to her successful prosecution of him on business fraud. According to the linked article, the grand jury probe into James is said to be looking into deprivation of rights, which means violating someone’s constitutional rights, against Trump.
From the link:
I do not see how they could investigate Trump’s perceived enemies and then fail to prosecute most of them. But I also do not see much chance of jury convictions, especially if tried in red states, as seems likely. And I also do not see Trump accepting the humiliation of acquittal after acquittal. How could this realistically play out?
Extortion?
I assume you meant “blue states” above?
Harassment. It’s essentially the same strategy which private citizen Trump used against his enemies and rivals for decades, in civil courts: keep filing nuisance lawsuits, and force people he hates to lawyer up and burn money on legal fees. Only, now, with the added bonus of possible actual jail time, due to the DOJ being his puppet.
His 2024 run for president was always about payback and staying out of prison.
The prosecution itself is consequence enough. The individual person may be exonerated, but their life will be tied up for years and the financial impact of funding the defense will be debilitating. This is then paraded as an example for others: don’t cross me or I’ll ruin your life.
I think it’s more narcissism. He genuinely doesn’t understand that he did anything wrong, and really believes that the prosecutions are a great criminal conspiracy against him. He totally thinks that they are the real criminals and he is the innocent victim.
And when senior LEOs tell him there is no crime to investigate, or if an investigation finds no evidence of wrongdoing, or if a Judge dismisses the case, Trump will genuinely think they are part of the conspiracy, and order an investigation into them too.
From the POV of the accused, yes, especially if another GOP administration is elected in 2028.
The unsuccessful prosecution of Donald Trump was not life-ruining or debilitating. When a co-defendant like Sidney Powell made a plea agreement, it was debilitating to her. But she was presumably guilty*. Defendants off of Kash Patel’s enemies list are unlikely to plea guilty on account of being innocent (although maybe some innocent lower level co-defendant, offered zero jail time in return, will at least plead no contest).
DJT would see it as unacceptable if major defendants were given a so-called slap on the wrist sentence, much less an acquittal. Think how Trump would feel when he meets peer dictators who are much more successful than he is at killing or jailing their internal enemies. Humiliation! I’m not saying Donald will destroy our system of fair trials. I am saying he will want to, and what then happens is hard to predict..
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* Presumably? As an opponent of plea bargains, I do not see a plea bargain, agreed upon to avoid the trial penalty, as being the same proof of guilt as a trial conviction.