So, just outside the main door this morning while I was at my scanning station inside was a 6 foot tall “Easter Bunny” who was greeting the kids and giving them small bags of treats. When one of my 5th grade sweeties came up to my station and scanned she said, “Miss Jasmine, Bunnies don’t lay eggs, birds do! This doesn’t even make any sense!” Quick on my feet I replied, “True, but the Easter Bunny is just a distributor. A distributor is someone who delivers a product to the people that was made by someone else.” She looked at me uncomprehendingly. I said, “You know, like UPS.” The light went on and she was satisfied! 
I never understood the Easter bunny. Rabbits have nothing to do with chickens, so why would a large rabbit be coloring and distributing their eggs? Why isn’t there an Easter Chicken? And what do rabbits and eggs have to do with Easter and Christianity? Who started it and why did they do it? It’s not like Christmas where you celebrate Jesus’ birthday by buying other people presents… which doesn’t make much sense either if you think about.
A spring festival called Beltane. It celebrates new birth, bunnies are profligate at making babies.
Except that, from what I can find, Beltane is Celtic while the Easter Bunny is of German origin.
I think that lots of religions had spring festivals celebrating new life, and a lot of the symbolism was shared between them. It’s easy to see both eggs and rabbits showing up as symbols of that.
Hey! Remember Cecil Adams? And his column, The Straight Dope?
What’s the connection between Easter and rabbits?
Nice!
Well done! I wish I could think on my feet that fast.
Hey! The main site is working again! Last I checked, it errored out, and I had to go find the column on a mirror.
Memories of elementary school like that are great. For example I saw my fifth grade teacher in an airport the summer after when she came around a corner right at us. My sister can still hear the echo of my voice vibrating the whole airport when I hollered the teacher’s name. She reeked of cigarette smoke and wore threadbare clothes but inspired the kids in a way unfathomable.
I believe in Santa, but not the easter bunny.
The trick to being witty is having an excellent memory. Some other kid has or will ask substantially the same question, and you’ve got your zinger at the ready.
As you say, the hard part is the first time. But there will be more.
I believe in Father Christmas — Greg Lake
There is a short story by Alan Ryan called, “Death to the Easter Bunny!” It’s one of those stories where you want to shriek and laugh at the same time.
“Holidays,” is an anthology movie with unique takes on the various yearly celebrations. “Easter” is interesting but probably not for children. Kevin Smith’s take on Hallowe’en is funny and disgusting at the same time. Of course.
Well, that takes me out of the running …
I think I read somewhere that the trick is having an excellent memory.
HA! A clever shot! LOL