Is anyone as tempted as I am to start a faked-up religion worshipping Xenu, the would-be nemesis of the Scientologists?
Occasionally, buying an ad in various papers proclaiming a Xenusian victory, having conquered the Scientologists of the Third Planet of Altair… making vague proclamations of the impending doom of the Earth, that sort of thing?
Personally, I and a number of my friends follow more along the lines of Boogah the petrified weasel god of strange coincidence. Boogah’s holy symbol is wood grain (the vinyl plastic type not the actual tree woodgrain). We have a tendency to make comments about strange coicidences as the Paw of Boogah strikeing. An example of this was once we were watching Star Trek: The wrath of khan one evening at just after Khan says “So, not so badly hurt as we were lead to believe! So much the better!” right then becky’s cuccko clock went “cuckoo!! cuckoo!!” Thus a boogah moment was born.
You have only freed me to realize my true purpose as adjutant Xenusian. My master commands me in first directive: enslavement! I have laid siege to the golden discs under the mountain. I await…