At what age, if any, would you let your son take the subway alone to go home from school (with nobody home) on Halloween dressed as a female character, to your possibly bedbug infested house/apartment?
If your answer changed based on the context, please explain:
- Age of your son (no at 4, yes at 9, maybe at 12, or not until he can legally pack heat)
- Which subway/metro system it is (NYC, Boston, DC, London, Paris, Moscow, or “other - please specify”)
- Disney Princess vs. Other Female Character (e.g., Chun Li from Street Fighter)
- If you’re raising the boy as a Wiccan (i.e., Halloween is really a Hallowed Day)
- What room(s) the bedbugs are infesting in your house, and type of attempted extermination tactic
- If your “boy” was born a hermaphrodite
- If you have gay friends raising children and you just wanted to say that
- The price of tea in China (spot price only, no speculation or hedging with commodities futures)
Please be sure to also make or imply judgmental, possibly derisive comments about where other people draw the line at age of the child, gender, character, bedbuggy-ness or even where they happen to live, because the LACK of such a comment itself would itself be incredibly judgmental. I mean, who the hell are you to say we’re judgmental? (Or as I like to say, in my best New Yorker accent, “What? Judge ME?! Judge YOU, you mother-judger!”)