And pickles. Did we mention those?
I think those were mentioned only once…for 20 minutes…
Has anyone contacted the Pickle Family Circus about this thread? Problem is, they have no monkeys or butlers to contribute. So screw 'em.
A while ago I thought my parrot was dead–turns out he was just pinin’ for the fnords, though. I woke him up with a pickle right across his little feathery nugget. Then he bit me. Ow.
Mmmm, pickles.
My daughter brought me marinated garlic olives from the Olive Pit in Corning–those are pickled enough to qualify–and I have home made pickled beans in my pantry. Now that’s some good pickle action I tellya!
Switzerland has no king. If I was you, posting in the greatest thread ever, I would claim to be the Emir of Swat.
Tris
Are we assigning tittles now? I want to be the Duke of Funk.
Somehow, the words “pickles” and “whole body cavity search” in the same sentence make me cringe.
And if you’d really like to enjoy brewha’s contribution, try singing it to the tune of “Hernando’s Hideway.”
In my attempt to be artsy, I purposely forced everyone to contemplate the meaning of the phrase " Who is woods these are I think I know".
I was trying to draw a comparison to a person actually being the woods instead of being in a woods. Wrap your mind around that!
[sub] or I don’t know the difference between who’s and whose grrrr.[/sub]
Maybe it was a regional thing. I’ve never seen it. Most movie theaters I have been to (except the fancier ones that have pizza and stuff) just have popcorn, nachos, hotdogs, and candy. Some have big pretzels, too. I wish they didn’t have hotdogs, though, because I’m sorry, but that is just a gross smell and when you’re watching a movie and the guy behind you is eating a hotdog… just…eww.
Well, can assigning jots be far behind?
crinz83, wrote a thread and said that this was the greatest thread ever. I wrote him back a post and told him it was not the Greatest Thread ever because he hadn’t said anything at all about:
*Trains, or trucks, or Mama, or prison, or gettin’ drunk.
Well, a Doper wrote back a post and after readin’ it I realized that my friend had writtten to Greatest Post Ever.
Best post goes like this here…
I was drunk the day my mom got outta prison
And I went to pick her up in the rain…*
Can we all sing the verse together?
Sgt Schwartz
brewha, you’re supposed to adapt the poetry to the forums. See:
Whose threads these are I think I know.
His house is in Chicago though.
He does not bother stopping here
To watch the dopers blather so.
The little mods must think it queer
To post without a spell-check near
With in-jokes and puns that make us ache,
Can you believe they volunteer?
They give their moderator tags a shake
To tell you of a rules mistake.
They keep their watch over the sheep
Who pine for pickles and birthday cake.
The forums are civil, nice and cheap,
But I have promised not to weep,
And postcounts to pad before I sleep,
And postcounts to pad before I sleep.
(Only a little bit tortured.)
**garygnu **, I applaude your cleverness - nicely done!
Sadly, I haven’t the gift of wit - only the gift of brain sludge.
The Greatest Thread Ever must include one
BUMP.
Laugh: Why did the snail take off his shell? He was feeling a little SLUGGISH!
Cry: Somewhere right now, somebody is dying.
Think: What if this is all a dream, and our dreams are reality?
Love: You’re beautiful and nothing can change that.
Hate: I dislike everything you represent.
It is done!
Blasphemy. This thread was done in post 4. Mods, please delete all subsequent posts and lock this thread. People are finger painting all over my Mona Lisa.
So I’ve actually been skinny dipping in a pool of custard with Jessica Simpson while Rage Against The Machine played a show in Carthage?
w00t!
I LOVE DIOSA BELLISSIMA!!!*
*or LAMP. Take your pick.
You can’t have a pickle thread without Olives!
But what is this nonsense about pickles at movie theatres? I am a born and bred Michigander and never heard of such a thing in my life. If it were true and not a horrible urban legend, however, I am certain the pickles would cost $10 a piece and you would not be permitted to smuggle in your own pickles.
Also may I contribute by being the irritating n00b who asks, "WTF do you mean by the ‘‘Tribute’’ reference? 
The ‘signature’ song of Tenacious D.
BTW, if you love pickles, peal and very thinly slice a bunch of cucumbers. Put in a bowl and pour a TON of salt on them. Throw in the fridge for a few hours. Rinse the crap out of them, but don’t squeeze them. Add Italian dressing, and tomatoes, if you like.
The cucumbers are almost like pickles. The Greatest Cucumber Salad Ever, in The Greatest Thread Ever.
That is the greatest thing I have ever heard. Thank you.